Love, Poopoo peepee and Health: IN A RUSH, SORRY

IN A RUSH, SORRY

By Anonymous - 04/07/2009 06:07 - United States

Today, my boyfriend returned from a 2-month internship in New York. As I saw him exit the plane, I imagined him running to me and kissing/spinning me around passionately like in movies. He got closer and closer, and as I opened my arms to embrace him, he runs past me saying, "BRB, I GOTTA TAKE A SHIT." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 800

You deserved it 10 789

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 19/07/2009 13:49 - United States

Today, after not seeing my boyfriend for 9 months, he came to meet me at the airport. I was so excited when I first saw him that I broke into a sprint to greet him. Apparently, running through the airport looks suspicious, because a security guard tackled me. Now I have a broken nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 363

You deserved it 7 623

Bad look

By Anonymous - 24/04/2024 02:00 - Jamaica

Today, after patiently waiting to see my boyfriend for a month because he was overseas, I excitedly went to the airport to finally pick him up, only for him to walk straight past me to greet his friends. He didn't even bring back anything for me, but brought back a suitcase full of goodies for his friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 580

You deserved it 105

By ouch - 01/09/2010 13:50 - Belgium

Today, I was in the airport after saying goodbye to my boyfriend who left for three months. Walking back to my car, I saw a young couple kissing passionately. If that wasn't bad enough, the guy then picked his girlfriend up, spun her round in the air and her foot kicked me square in the jaw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 329

You deserved it 4 202

By sadgf - 25/07/2009 04:25 - United States

Today, my boyfriend came home from being deployed for the past 3 months. As soon as he gets out of the car, he walks right past me and goes to hug his dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 844

You deserved it 8 875

By tina - 17/08/2010 12:30 - Canada

Today, I ran into my boyfriend at the mall, the same boyfriend who'd told me he was going on a family vacation to Mexico. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 178

You deserved it 4 101

By Anonymous - 19/05/2019 00:05

Today, I was seeing my boyfriend for the first time in 3 weeks. I was so excited to see him that I gave him a big hug. He must have been excited to see me too, because he hugged me so tight that he squeezed a fart out of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 984

You deserved it 265

By sunkissedberries - 15/07/2010 04:12 - United States

Today, I ran into my boyfriend. The same guy that told me he was still in Florida with his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 669

You deserved it 3 879

By kissless - 10/10/2009 19:04 - United States

Today, my boyfriend left for a month-long trip with his buddies. I stood near the door waiting for a goodbye kiss. He kissed his xbox goodbye instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 422

You deserved it 5 887

By grossedout - 01/11/2014 00:39

Today, I was walking back to my dorm with my boyfriend. He was being really sweet as he held my hand. We were about to kiss goodnight and as he pushed some hair out of my face he said, "Can we hurry it up? I'm about to rip one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 039

You deserved it 3 722

Romantic

By Anonymous - 23/04/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was meeting my girlfriend at the airport after studying abroad for a year. She ran to hug me, and I wanted to pick her up and spin her around, like they do in those romantic movies. I tried to do that, but instead I dropped her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 832

You deserved it 54 339

LuckyCharms_fml 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 16:04

That's love.

paperfox_fml 0

Saturday 4 July 2009 16:15

Your life is ****** because your boyfriend needed a poo when he got off a plane?

Comments

yaknowiverse 0

Thursday 22 September 2011 23:27

that's just lovely. LMFAO.

UNICORNmonster 0

Monday 10 October 2011 23:52

I would have laughed like hell, then gave him shit about it later. Whenever he wanted sex, throw his own line right back at him. :D

ronniejacobs 6

Saturday 17 March 2012 19:21

I don't think you'd want a shitty hug lol

Funkymunky1511 4

Friday 28 September 2012 10:39

Maybe he's gonna kiss you after he take a sht. :))

gators1995 30

Wednesday 29 May 2013 15:58

Sounds like a blooper

Coolaidegirl 18

Monday 19 August 2013 8:19

hey i wouldnt use those airplane toilets either

fantasyworld 37

Friday 29 August 2014 15:35

Airplane toilets are gross.

whateves997 19

Tuesday 17 February 2015 19:15

Get fudging roasted

Mooto 8

Friday 10 July 2015 11:39

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

midnight1890 17

Wednesday 2 November 2016 7:11

I think the real FML here is that your boyfriend said "BRB" out loud in a scentence...

Keywords

Friends Love Awkward Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable You're fired Work Cars Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management Poopoo peepee Coworkers Frustration Capitalism Dogs Animals ADHD Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 885

You deserved it 61 102

Today, myself and my pug entered a novelty dog competition at the local fair. We won first prize in the lookalike contest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 281

You deserved it 233

The Top

Today, my company held another team building event, and it's annoying. It was third event for this month only. I like having fun, but we keep losing clients and revenue. Our boss knows this, but she keeps encouraging us to "find our energy and channel it into productivity." Next week, we're going to a beach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 091

You deserved it 442

Today, I was babysitting my co-worker's son. He was eating Jell-o and spilled it on his top, so I pulled off his PJ's, and went in his room to grab a new pair. I heard a thunk and ran to find him out cold on the floor. His parents walked in on me trying to wake up their naked 3 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 012

You deserved it 6 062

Today, my fiancé left to take care of his little sister who lives alone and recently got COVID-19. To be cautious, he will remain there for weeks until he tests negative. Feeling lonely, I texted my mom for comfort. She immediately canceled our engagement party this summer instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 168

You deserved it 530

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 245

You deserved it 3 701

Today, my wife is refusing to go on our honeymoon because the resort we chose won’t allow pets. She’s now angry with me for not checking before we booked the place, and is threatening divorce if I go without her. I told her we could just get a dog sitter, but she refuses. Oh well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 295

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend crying. Concerned, I quickly asked her what was wrong. She told me tearfully that she couldn't understand why her pet lizards hadn’t grown into dinosaurs yet, and that pet store had cheated her. I’m still concerned now, but for entirely different reasons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 576

You deserved it 4 355

IN A RUSH, SORRY

Same thing different taste

Bad look

Romantic

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