Healthy Lifestyle, Dentist, Ironic and Health: Irony at a base level

Irony at a base level

By SterlingEnigma - 25/09/2009 08:43 - United States

Today, I decided to start making healthier decisions. Instead of the usual cheeseburger I have for lunch I ate an apple instead. I took one bite and broke one of my teeth. Apparently, apples keep the doctor away, but not dentists. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 345

You deserved it 7 383

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Same thing different taste

By ouch - 05/10/2015 19:20 - United States - Stockton

Today, I cracked my tooth. I was so tired I put my pretzel stick in my tea and took a bite out of my spoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 876

You deserved it 3 771

By bucktooth - 26/04/2012 23:04 - United Kingdom

Today, while enjoying breakfast, my teeth took a chunk out of my cheek. This happens regularly, even when I'm talking. Both my doctor and dentist have no idea why, and I'm in utter agony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 464

You deserved it 2 671

Great idea

By dumbbb - 27/12/2011 08:30 - United States

Today, I tried to open the door with my mouth because my hands were full. I chipped a tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 264

You deserved it 46 028

Hangry dude

By Anonymous - 07/08/2021 20:01

Today, I accidentally bit so hard on my fork that I cracked my tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 247

Snap!

By fax4voice3 - 28/08/2023 18:02 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I was flossing my teeth, which I do only to not get yelled at (chewed out?) by my dentist. Dentist I’ll now be seeing later today because the floss broke off a corner of one of my molars. FML

I agree, your life sucks 530

You deserved it 183

Strange metric

By Anonymous - 03/11/2020 01:57 - United States

Today, I decided that I need to lose weight when I discovered I could no longer chew on my own toenails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 232

You deserved it 1 533

By howaboutthemcarrots - 14/04/2015 15:08 - Finland - Laajalahti

Today, I decided to be healthy and make a fresh juice out of carrots and apples. Apparently, something had gone bad and now my asshole feels like a bomb just went off inside it. Good start to a healthy lifestyle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 354

You deserved it 4 200

Food ****

By Anonymous - 11/06/2021 22:01

Today, I decided to start eating healthier, so I had fruit and yoghurt for breakfast and a chicken salad for lunch. My stomach violently rejected both meals in a fountain of vomit. I later ate a giant McDonald’s meal with no issue, and felt loads better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 828

You deserved it 340

Fight Club

By Nose bleed - 16/04/2014 02:48 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I was eating an apple in class. When I went to take a big bite, my teeth went right through the apple, causing me to scrape the apple right up my face. My nose then started to bleed. I'm now known as the girl who punched herself in the face with an apple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 314

You deserved it 7 814

Venn diagram of healthy living

By Anonymous - 10/02/2023 00:00

Today, after a conversation with my dentist on how to prevent further suffering, I realized that what is good for my teeth, my health, and my digestion are actually three different things that don’t offer much overlap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 108

Blobenshnogen 0

Friday 25 September 2009 16:06

Who breaks their teeth on an apple...?

plutosaplanet 0

Friday 25 September 2009 16:12

an apple is a fruit....

Comments

Jakojan 4

Saturday 27 February 2010 2:01

oh so YOURE the jerk that took my rock that i painted red because it looked like an apple? how could you? YDI

wolfman860 0

Sunday 2 May 2010 3:38

dentists are doctors you dumb ****

globulerouge_fml 0

Friday 21 May 2010 19:26

just an apple is not a lunch either.

angryangry 0

Sunday 2 January 2011 19:59

Your apple is made of stone?lol...your life sucks!

Rj93 8

Thursday 17 February 2011 5:22

this will teach you that you should've tried eating healthier earlier, before your teeth were weakened by all the crap you ate -_-' YDI!

Madstar744 0

Sunday 24 April 2011 16:51

people who eat fatty foods are obviously all fat slobs... I ate three burritos, a packet of doritos, a bacon and egg roll and two slices of chocolate caramel pie and I'm 110 lbs ... I eat like this everyday, come at me bro.