Illness and Work: Lava

Lava

By not_fakingit - 22/09/2013 04:26 - Canada - Montr?al

Today, I joked with my boss about calling in sick to work tomorrow with food poisoning to avoid taking the Sunday shift. Tonight, I'm sitting on the toilet bowl in agonizing pain with combination diarrhea and vomiting. My shift starts in 3 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 564

You deserved it 11 247

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 06/06/2015 04:20 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I have food poisoning. My boss told me that if I didn't come into work, I'd be fired. Not 30 minutes after sitting down, I sneezed and shat my pants. My boss still won't let me leave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 933

You deserved it 2 190

Not a morning person

By Anonymous - 30/01/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I was forced to come in to work early in the morning. For me, that means I will have a pounding migraine, vomiting, and diarrhea for at least the next two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 281

By Anonymous - 02/08/2013 21:34 - United Kingdom - Newcastle Upon Tyne

Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 021

You deserved it 5 403

By Anonymous - 05/01/2011 20:22 - United States

Today, I returned to work after celebrating the New Year in Mexico. I wasn't feeling well, but didn't want to call in sick after already taking a vacation. Now I'm at work with diarrhea, and trotting to the bathroom every 30 minutes. My commute home usually takes around an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 479

You deserved it 5 807

Buckethead

By hi! - 17/09/2021 14:00

Today, I called in sick for the first time. My boss said that if I didn’t show up, not only would he fire me, but he’d make sure I never find another job for the rest of my life. So I showed up to work with a bucket, puking every five minutes. My boss still made me stay the full nine hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 808

You deserved it 142

Walk, don't run

By Anonymous - 19/07/2022 03:00 - Finland

Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 015

You deserved it 113

By Anonymous - 21/04/2015 15:40 - United States - Ann Arbor

Today, despite having a stomach bug, I went into work, as my boss is overseas and had warned me not to take any sick leave until she returned. After 4 hours and vomiting twice, I left. She found out and sent me an email bitching me out for coming in sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 379

You deserved it 2 933

By anon - 26/07/2010 04:22 - United States

Today, I was fired from the restaurant I work at because I missed my shift. I missed it because I was in the hospital for food poisoning from the meal I ate at work last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 110

You deserved it 3 235

By Wow - 23/12/2018 16:00

Today, I have a job interview after months of struggling to find work. I also woke up with explosive diarrhea and can’t be away from the toilet for more than 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 634

You deserved it 148

By Mark - 27/02/2015 18:24 - Malta - Naxxar

Today, I was feeling terrible so I called in sick to work. My boss refused to believe me and told me he'd fire me if I didn't come in. I dragged myself to work, only to spend most of the day glued to the toilet. Now he says I won't be paid for the day because I barely did any work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 869

You deserved it 2 721

EpicSquishii 21

Sunday 22 September 2013 13:16

I'd get a doctors note if I were you. Just to be sure your boss knows that it's legit. Hope you feel better, OP. Try and stay hydrated.

KatieMajestic 17

Sunday 22 September 2013 13:18

You jinxed it.

Comments

Memen88 16

Monday 23 September 2013 5:26

never joke about calling in, case in point

jrock9093 18

Monday 23 September 2013 7:11

Karma is a Biach but a valuable lesson hope you feel better

thegravytrain 6

Monday 23 September 2013 7:41

Just send your boss a picture message of your vomit and you next to the toilet with a piece of paper saying todays date, and just be like "I know its kinda gross but just so there isnt any doubt, haha. I know it was a terrible joke last night but I really am sick its a horrible coincidence" Your boss will understand

Cheez_Mastah 10

Monday 23 September 2013 7:42

At first I read "combustible diarrhea" and I was kinda terrified for a sec.

ANLemus 3

Monday 23 September 2013 7:59

Karma.

04NewEdge101 1

Monday 23 September 2013 10:12

worst case scenario, you can face time it lol he'll have to believe you then. :P

KeeLady 20

Monday 23 September 2013 10:30

Sounds like it could be Viral Gastroenteritis! I've had it, no fun at all. :( Hope you feel better OP!

TheOneMica 6

Monday 23 September 2013 13:12

Ugh I've had that RIGHT BEFORE vacation (it almost didn't go away before vacation, thank god it did), and it was the worst illness I've had in my entire life. I had it for 10 days, too. It would not go away and I couldn't take medicine for it because of my other meds conflicting with ANYTHING that effected the stomach. Poor OP man.

HaleiJ 16

Monday 23 September 2013 12:43

All of you saying it's karma are stupid. OP was joking around with their boss and ended up sick. It's an unfortunate coincidence, not karma. If karma came back to bite everyone who joked around we'd all be screwed.

bungholemcgee 11

Monday 23 September 2013 21:47

If he doesn't believe you, just send him a picture of your diarrhea.

birds_fml 7

Tuesday 24 September 2013 3:04

LOL OP! It always happens like that! One time I was joking with my boss and coworkers on how I was going to call in sick the next day so I could go see a midnight showing of a movie. I didn't actually plan on doing so, since I wasn't really interested enough in that movie. But that night my boyfriend dumped me, and I had to call in sick the next day because I couldn't stop crying. My boss didn't believe I'd actually been dumped for weeks, and kept making fun of me over it. I finally had to have my store manager talk to her about it. She finally believed me months later when I started dating a new guy (who I'm now married to).