Health, Pranks and Sunburn: Life's a beach

Life's a beach

By Brittanyy_leigh - 17/12/2009 07:57 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 157

You deserved it 6 018

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Same thing different taste

By Beccarr - 01/07/2009 17:04 - United Kingdom

Today, it was boiling hot so my boyfriend and I decided to sunbathe in the garden and ended up falling asleep for a few hours. Not only is my back so burnt that I can't lie down, I also have a white hand print on my upper back where my boyfriend had left his arm while we slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 665

You deserved it 45 661

By poopedon - 26/04/2009 03:10 - Canada

Today, I was at the beach and fell asleep in the sun. When I woke up, there was a blob of sunscreen on my leg. Thinking it was my boyfriend who was sweet enough to squeeze sunscreen for me, I rubbed it into my leg. After smelling my hands, I discovered it was bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 998

You deserved it 18 158

By Anonymous - 08/04/2009 04:03 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend and I were outside tanning in the sun. I asked her if she could put some sunscreen on my back. Thinking it would be funny, she used the lotion to write "I Love Little Boys". I work as a children's swimming instructor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 659

You deserved it 6 233

By Burned - 05/06/2011 00:54 - United States

Today, I went to the beach with my friends to show off my engagement ring. I fell asleep in the sun and woke up extremely sunburnt to a text from my boyfriend confessing that he's been cheating on me. I gave him the ring back. Now I have its tan line on my finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 108

You deserved it 7 103

By Crashburn - 16/01/2012 11:09 - United Kingdom

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 873

You deserved it 15 390

By ilovedirt - 10/07/2011 03:12 - United States

Today, I was tanning by the pool. My friend put his arms under my back and knees and picked me up. He threw me across the kiddy pool to my boyfriend, shouting "Catch!" My boyfriend didn't catch me. Instead of a tan, I have a huge bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 320

You deserved it 3 768

By Anonymous - 21/02/2010 12:56 - United States

Today, I was at the beach with my boyfriend in Key West. I had gotten a bikini wax and new swimsuit for the occasion. My boyfriend was being romantic until he pulled a long hair from a mole on my leg. It's all fun and games until the mole starts bleeding, profusely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 429

You deserved it 4 477

By tooembarrassed - 12/02/2016 15:13 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was cuddling with the man I've been seeing, and he started caressing the mammoth of all pimples on my back. He continued fondling me while lecturing me on the dangers of skin cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 194

You deserved it 1 994

By Dlpnlvr85 - 10/07/2016 18:43 - United States - Elkhart

Today, I woke up to find some really weird stuff in my bed. We just got back from vacation in Florida, and my husband burned really bad. I woke up to his peeled off skin all over my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 576

You deserved it 845

This is fine

By Anonymous - 09/06/2012 02:36 - United Kingdom - London

Today, at the beach, my boyfriend picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I felt my bikini top come undone in the process. I panicked and pulled down on his shorts. We were fined for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 661

You deserved it 10 376

Anteezy 7

Thursday 17 December 2009 16:13

haha genius.

aback 4

Thursday 17 December 2009 16:43

He wanted to be able to say that his dick had made you sore, and that was the only way.

Comments

fobchick 0

Thursday 17 December 2009 16:58

Your boyfriend is hilarious. EPIC

turnedoffTVgrey 0

Thursday 17 December 2009 16:58

I though you wanted a penis on your back.

xxreikoxx 31

Thursday 17 December 2009 17:06

Forgive my ignorance when I ask, "How does that work?" (My ignorance comes from my inability to be out in the sun. -_-) The boyfriend was sure to feel a little bit of pain in return,...right?

chicky82 5

Thursday 17 December 2009 17:10

I would draw a ****** on his face in black sharpie while he sleeps, that would serve him right :)

twin_spirit 0

Thursday 17 December 2009 17:51

No, she should draw a penis on his back too....a droopy floppy one.....or on his forehead

CallMeHush 0

Thursday 17 December 2009 17:17

I don't understand, what girl wouldn't want a giant dick on her back? BTW it is easy to do, first you start with small areas until outline is roughed out. Then do larger areas until the masterpiece is finished. Not that I ever shaved a dick into the back of someone's head or anything.

xxreikoxx 31

Thursday 17 December 2009 18:28

I'm talking about burning the back with a penis, not shaving one onto somebody's head. Read more carefully.

CallMeHush 0

Thursday 17 December 2009 18:38

No shit... same process, you approach it slowly and protect the outline, they never catch on... of course what am i thinking I'm not the one with a Dick Tan, but I bet you get another one.