Painful, Bikes and Kids: Nature is harsh

Nature is harsh

By fallsdownplenty45 - 02/06/2009 11:08 - Taiwan

Today, I went biking. I attempted a large hill and lost control, slipped, and fell ten feet into a sewage pit. Riding home covered in crap, my sock caught my chain and I flipped over my bike. My dad had to spray me with the garden hose, bloody and shitty, in the front yard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 933

You deserved it 6 759

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Same thing different taste

I want to ride my bicycle

By Anonymous - 27/06/2021 14:02

Today, I decided to ride my bike for the first time in over a year. It was seemingly going well, until I got to the first hill. As I began to ascend, I was trying a bit to hard and shit my pants, 8 kilometers away from my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 880

You deserved it 301

By cathugger - 13/07/2019 16:30

Today, while hurrying by bike to an appointment, my chain broke. I quickly got off the road and managed to fix it on the sidewalk, covering my hands in black smear. Dirty but confident about my repair skills, I got up. A second later, felt something warm running down my neck. Bird poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 928

You deserved it 130

By SmellyLeg - 20/11/2017 15:00

Today, my bike slipped on ice and I slid spectacularly for several meters. While my helmet saved me from a cracked skull, nothing could protect me from landing leg-first in the dog poop somebody hadn't bothered to pick up. I had to go to school like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 325

You deserved it 323

Biking

By OMGWTF - 13/08/2009 02:01 - United States

Today, while biking home from work, a 12 mile trip, I was speeding down a long hill and my jean pant leg got caught in the chain. It ripped, and then the rest of my pant leg ripped off. I had to bike 10 more miles half naked along the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 144

You deserved it 6 148

By me - 11/11/2010 18:11 - United States

Today, my friend and I were racing on our bicycles when my chain snapped. I went over the handlebars and slid, on my back, for about ten feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 281

You deserved it 4 902

By Lawrence - 06/08/2009 04:55 - United States

Today, I was riding my bike to the local grocery store to pick up some supplies for dinner. On the way down, traveling down a hill, I hit a drain with no lid. I went to grab hold of the nearest object to soften my fall. That nearest object was a barbed wire fence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 686

You deserved it 3 740

Don't mind me

By Moon-chan - 30/06/2019 00:30 - Netherlands

Today, I was cycling home. On the way, my laces got stuck in the bicycle pedals and I couldn't move the foot that got stuck. The bicycle fell over, with me attached to it. Everyone was looking at me like, "What are you doing?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 536

You deserved it 355

**** the environment

By Anonymous - 02/12/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I was trying to be environmentally friendly by riding my BMX to work. My 'rad skills' are out of whack because I hit a pothole, fell off, and landed in a pile of trash bags that were dumped by the side of the road. The irony wasn’t lost on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 137

By maybenot - 06/08/2012 23:25 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 828

You deserved it 29 952

Like an animal

By limeychefboy - 23/02/2018 01:30

Today, I was on my motorbike 200km from home, in the middle of nowhere, when I needed to poop, so I found a wooded area and did my thing. As I was climbing back up, I knocked my helmet from its perch and watched it roll right into what I’d just left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 731

You deserved it 2 269

poolshark 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:17

You might want to look into a tetanus shot and some antibiotics... feces and open wounds do not mix.

padlarf 14

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:09

Holy shit man!

Comments

PsychoX 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:07

Nice, 48. It's really too bad the heart symbol doesn't work on these comments (at least last time I tried). Good call. @OP: Just be glad your crush didn't drive by while your dad was hosing the shit and blood off you, right? It could always be worse. And yeah, 77, bikes can slip. So can people. So can cars. So can motorbikes. So can timing belts. Actually, anywhere two things touch, they can slip.

darkday979 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:11

Damn I almost feel sorry for u....

Misanthropist 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:12

OP, this is the first time in a long time I have felt sincerely bad for any FML author in months. FYL.

genius_man16 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:17

#46 and all the "FAKE" screamers Have you looked at every sewage line in the entire world? I'm guessing not. I'm sure it's fair to say that there is an open sewage drain SOMEWHERE in the world for whatever reason. Maybe they are doing some construction near there and that's why there was an open drain? Maybe just after years and years of erosion the dirty was washed away and there was a hole in one of the sewage drains that was exposed? etc etc Think for a minute before you post next time so you don't look like such a dumbass.

footbag 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:17

Lmao u fagget

random3742 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:21

Wow 82 way to go bitch y would he deserve this if it is true its just a hell of a lot of bad luck

kashi_fml 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:25

ouch... are you okay? ;)

midnighthammers 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:29

I call bullshit on this

Skooma 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 22:29

Soz owned by a pile of shit haha I really feel your pain there. I fell into a pile of horse manure a while back. After accidentally stepping on it, I got freeked out and fell right into it. Oh well at least I didnt fall into toxic human shit haha