Sex, Awkward, Religion, Neighbours and Intimacy: Nice place to live!

Nice place to live!

By GrossedOutKary - 19/05/2010 19:20 - Puerto Rico

Today, after finally moving into a better neighborhood, my family and I were greeted by the elderly couple who live window to window to us. How? By hearing them have sex loudly and then praying for forgiveness even louder. Welcome to the neighborhood! FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 057

You deserved it 3 413

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Same thing different taste

By holler - 15/09/2011 04:22 - Japan

Today, I had my parents over at my new apartment. As I was telling them how quiet and peaceful my new place is, we could hear my neighbors talking nasty to each other before launching into a full-blown sex ordeal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 181

You deserved it 3 160

By Ceej - 28/10/2012 04:06 - United States - Grand Haven

Today, my husband and I were told by our elderly neighbors that they can hear us having sex a lot. To top it off, the elderly man said while patting his wife's arm with a smile, "Carol used to make noises like that too, back in the day." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 916

You deserved it 7 072

Get it on, bang a gong

By can’t sleep - 17/06/2020 17:04

Today, and for the fourth time in a week, my 60-year-old neighbors have woken me up by having obnoxiously loud sex. Complete with over the top moaning and the headboard smashing against our shared wall. When I asked them nicely to quiet down, they laughed and called me jealous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 027

You deserved it 366

NSFW, NSFL

By 12MONTHLEASE - 22/04/2016 00:30 - United States

Today, my new upstairs neighbors moved in. Within ten minutes of getting in the door they were screaming and arguing about everything, practically handing out death threats to each other. I then heard them having even louder makeup sex for about three hours afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 796

You deserved it 1 765

By pear8head - 08/08/2009 16:31 - United States

Today, I ran into my new apartment neighbor. She said she could hear me and my girlfriend having wild sex last night. She told me she had always wanted to have a threesome. My new neighbor is as old as my grandma, and even resembles her. I politely declined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 314

You deserved it 5 911

By 44magnumtime - 06/08/2012 17:57 - Canada - Oakville

Today, some new people moved into the house next door to mine. The previous occupants were very loud and obnoxious day in and day out, so I was looking forward to some sanity. When I went outside, I noticed they'd parked their cars on my lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 642

You deserved it 1 748

Hi there!

By curtain buyer - 09/03/2015 01:05 - United States - Albany

Today, I moved into my new apartment. As I sat in my living room watching Netflix, I found out that my window has an excellent view of my new neighbors, who just so happen to like to shag with the blinds open. I guess I'll be buying some curtains. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 056

You deserved it 3 707

By Username - 03/08/2011 14:33 - United States

Today, I got an anonymous letter, stating my condo's community and all my neighbors can hear me having sex. Not only that, but kids gather around my window to listen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 690

You deserved it 37 593

By :(( - 25/04/2012 18:46 - United States - Saint Petersburg

Today, I heard my neighbors having a violent argument in their front yard. I listened in, and soon found out why the wife wasn't happy with her husband. Apparently, she had caught her husband peeking through my windows for the second time this month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 922

You deserved it 2 397

YELP!

By Anonymous - 19/04/2022 12:00 - United States - Brookline

Today, my new neighbours moved in. I had always thought my bedroom wall was soundproof, because my old neighbours never complained about my loud night terrors. Turns out they were just stone deaf. The new ones can hear everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 928

You deserved it 137

DaBlankoMan 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 1:57

New home in a nice neighborhood? $300,000 The old couple next door? priceless

missvee98324 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 1:56

old people ftw

Comments

Rawr_Doodle 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 8:05

DAMN 52 your fine! and that's coming from a girl...

timelesshour 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 8:07

welcome to the gayberhood!

luvtruckguy 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 8:32

ha better neighborhood just means that they pray afterwords lol

krazykiya12095 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 9:07

thats funny AF . ahah ! they got it ooooonnn !

partyman007 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 15:59

go have sex an be even louder then them

mpclaw 3

Thursday 20 May 2010 16:18

what kind of "better" neighborhood is window to window? you should answer back!

youthink_fml 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 17:23

What do you expect? That's what happens when you move into a place where your neighbors are "window to window".

torcom 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 20:00

Time for a threesome!!!

metalmaiden 0

Friday 21 May 2010 10:38

Old people sex. Ftw! Did they use mayo? :P

pfunk129 1

Friday 21 May 2010 16:28

#53 is hawt.

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The Top

Today, I tried to get a picture of a cute cat while on my morning walk. The cat didn't run away scared, it was even as if he knew it was "strike a pose" time. Then, out of nowhere, a seagull swooped down and stole my breakfast bagel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 263

You deserved it 224

Today, on my first day as a community support officer, a 7-foot meathead in the middle of a domestic argument told me to “piss off shorty”, and when I asked him not to swear at me, he picked me up one-handed and threw me in a builder's skip full of mud and wet cement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 559

You deserved it 351

The Top

Today, I spent 3 hours looking at a youtube video for how to do rubik's cube. Even after being told how to do it, I couldn't finish it. I scroll down at the comments and read "Awesome! I'm 10 and can do it in 3 minutes now!". I'm 28 and still couldn't get it, even with a guide. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 639

You deserved it 11 013

Today, I awoke to find a giant turd on my carpet, cat hair everywhere in my room, and a big hole in my window screen. I don't own a cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 114

You deserved it 2 404

Today, I was happy about finally having the time to pot up the $50 worth of reblooming iris's I bought. Until I went into the garage and couldn't find them. My husband cleaned up and threw them in the garbage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 000

You deserved it 282

Today, my husband was two hours late from picking up my daughter from practice. I called his cell once to check if they were alright. When they finally arrived, he was annoyed at me for "controlling" him. He then pushed his sweaty shirt in my face to take in his "musty scent". When I refused, he got mad again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 034

You deserved it 141

Today, I had to show a new student around my school. Normally, that wouldn't be such a bad thing, but the student was my crazy, overly-attached ex. I transferred schools to get away from her in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 997

You deserved it 3 598

Today, I returned to work after celebrating the New Year in Mexico. I wasn't feeling well, but didn't want to call in sick after already taking a vacation. Now I'm at work with diarrhea, and trotting to the bathroom every 30 minutes. My commute home usually takes around an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 479

You deserved it 5 807