Miscellaneous: Patronising

Patronising

By quickfingers100 - 22/05/2011 09:31 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad married his fiancée, who insists I call her "Mom." I'm three years older than her, and went to the same high school. She's taking me shopping next week to buy me "something nice." FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 399

You deserved it 4 247

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By guy - 15/03/2013 05:31 - Canada - Port Coquitlam

Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 781

You deserved it 3 363

Hey!

By wtf dad - 10/01/2013 03:15 - United States - Saint Charles

Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 444

You deserved it 3 320

Is this guy Hugh Hefner?

By Gold diggerzzzzzzz - 15/03/2021 13:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad is getting married for the 4th time. First it was my mom, then as they got older, he married a woman 10 years his junior, then his third wife was my age and 28 years his junior. Now at the grand old age of 64, he is marrying a 22 year old, 42 years his junior, almost 2 decades younger than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 236

You deserved it 119

By OfCourse - 27/06/2009 05:32 - United States

Today, I learned my 40 year old father is marrying a girl barely a year and a half older than me. She told me not to be afraid to call her mom. I was torn between punching her in the face and vomiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 289

You deserved it 3 427

Thanks Dad

By Anonymous - 07/09/2018 03:00 - United States - Anchorage

Today, my father told all of us that he eloped with his girlfriend of two months. I'm engaged to the woman's daughter, and have been engaged since before they met, but now my family is making fun of me for marrying my "sister". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 627

You deserved it 226

By Anonymous - 23/08/2012 21:40 - Ireland - Kilkelly

Today, my dad introduced me to my half-sister. He'd only recently found out that he had another daughter by another woman, and had only just met her. She and I have been in the same class in school for the past three years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 018

You deserved it 1 686

By Stephie2009 - 30/10/2010 06:33 - United States

Today, my mother got remarried. I am now officially older than my step-father. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 702

You deserved it 3 146

By - - 09/11/2010 00:38 - United States

Today, my daughter got engaged. Her fiancé is not only 25 years older than her, but was her teacher in middle school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 072

You deserved it 4 555

Tripping

By Blank - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my new step-dad proposed to my mom during a family trip to Wal-Mart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 956

You deserved it 4 237

Apron strings

By heatherjo - 02/11/2011 04:49 - United States

Today, my fiancé told me he wants to buy an engagement ring for his mother, so that she doesn't feel left out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 541

You deserved it 3 934

CateXOX 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 16:14

I think your dad has some serious issues...

Astroman129 7

Sunday 22 May 2011 16:12

whatever. She can't control what comes out of your mouth.

Comments

deaper 16

Sunday 22 May 2011 19:40

Umm.... Maybe the fact that it's effing sick to go after a partner who's nearly the same age as YOUR OWN KID?

smurfman44265034 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 19:44

**** her

CitrusGirl 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 19:52

Anyone else think of Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure?

maialuvstdi 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 19:59

**** you, not ur life

TheDrummingResul 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 20:09

holy shit!

Zdog101 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 20:10

iz ur dad hue heffner

SigneRobertson 1

Sunday 22 May 2011 20:13

I think your dad is a very selfish person to be with a woman who is so disrespectful to his children.

xpskl 5

Sunday 22 May 2011 20:15

dude, your dad has issues...0_0

matttheman33 0

Sunday 22 May 2011 20:21

...auquard...

GoArmy6624 7

Sunday 22 May 2011 20:23

awesome

Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Haircut Cute Relatable Work Cars You're fired Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Sex Roommate Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me to completely shave off all of my already-groomed pubic area because, "It looks so unnatural." Ignoring the obvious lack of logic, I asked him why he keeps his totally ungroomed. Turns out "Men having hair is okay. Women aren't supposed to, though." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 090

You deserved it 13 428

Today, I followed my daughter and found out she wasn’t with friends, she was on a date. I confronted her about the lie, but she takes after her mother, a lawyer, and steamrollered over me about invading her privacy, so even though she lied, she somehow has the moral high ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 2 713

The Top

Today, my household ran out of toilet paper so we have to shower after every dump. My mom just confessed that she does in fact have money for shit tickets, but won't buy any because it's the only way she can get my brother to shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 204

You deserved it 278

Today, it's been twelve years, seven months, and fifteen days since my wife has wanted sex. She was drunk. She no longer drinks. Guess my name is Job now and I have to be patient. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 138

You deserved it 357

Today, I got an empty peanut butter jar to put my used insulin needles in so nobody gets stuck. My husband washed it for me. He also wrote all over it: "Fuck off!" "Sharp!" "Do not fucking touch!" "Go away!" "Do not fucking throw away!" Thanks, sweetie. Now it looks like a crazy guy shouting on the subway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 165

You deserved it 320

Today, the guy I was sexting asked me to stop including my face in the pictures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 041

You deserved it 22 530

Today, at work, my colleague started to look for a new job. For me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 984

You deserved it 723

Today, I found out how messed up I am when a guy held a knife to my throat and it turned me on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 067

You deserved it 463