Love: Perfect timing

Perfect timing

By Anonymous - 10/08/2009 20:18 - United Kingdom

Today, my friend and I were arguing over whose boyfriend was better. Just as I was about to convince her, my boyfriend rang. Trying to start the perfect conversation, I put him on speaker phone and answered, "Hey Tiger, I was just thinking about you!" He broke up with me on speaker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 896

You deserved it 16 347

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/07/2009 18:47 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me to break up with me. Immediately after we hung up, I started crying hysterically. I thought I dialed my best friend, and as soon as the line picked up, I yelled, "That motherfucker broke up with me!" My now ex-boyfriend replied, "Yeah, I know I did." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 795

You deserved it 20 521

By Anonymous - 12/08/2009 02:05 - United States

Today, my boyfriend sent me a text saying to call him. When I did, it went straight to voicemail. It was a recording of him breaking up with me. He broke up with me over the phone, without even talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 808

You deserved it 3 291

By noboyfriend - 24/05/2009 04:14 - United States

Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend. I called him and started yelling at him over the phone. He told me that if I wanted to end the relationship I should just hang up the phone right then. Before I could say I still love him and don't want to break up, my phone battery died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 108 360

You deserved it 26 547

By Anonymous - 17/08/2018 14:30

Today, I called my boyfriend and a woman answered. Turns out, she's also his girlfriend. She broke up with me on his behalf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 549

You deserved it 222

Alexa, play "I'm Not In Love" by 10CC

By sucker - 07/09/2019 17:01 - United States - Duluth

Today, I went on a date I was really enjoying. My ex-boyfriend called halfway through. When I answered, he told me he wanted to get back together and couldn’t stop thinking about me. I didn’t realize my phone was on speaker. My date heard everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 678

You deserved it 2 539

By And you think I'M crazy? - 22/04/2013 05:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I got into an argument. Naturally, I drove over to my best friend's house for comfort. My boyfriend saw me driving past his house and promptly broke up with me for being "a psycho stalker." She lives across the street from him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 079

You deserved it 6 290

Hello?

By Anonymous - 17/07/2024 16:00 - Canada

Today, I butt-dialed my ex-boyfriend while venting to my best friend about how hot but emotionally unavailable he is. I realized this when there was a lull in the conversation and I heard his tinny little voice coming out of the phone, saying, "I can hear you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 499

Crossed purposes

By knee2tak - 14/03/2009 09:46 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend, "We need to talk." He said, "I know". So we met after school, and he said he was OK with me breaking up with him, that he wasn't that into me either. He said all that before I could tell him that my parents wanted to meet him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 364

You deserved it 11 287

Bragging rights

By lucasbeck99 - 31/03/2015 09:35 - United States - Mabank

Today, I got in an argument with an ex-girlfriend who kept tactlessly bragging to me about her new boyfriend. I told her to read what she'd sent me, then pretend her boyfriend was telling her that. Fifteen minutes later, her boyfriend calls me, yelling for making her feel sad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 371

You deserved it 3 870

By ihateguys - 26/09/2014 19:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I heard my boyfriend talking with my father in the backyard. I thought he was asking for my hand in marriage. He was actually telling him about his plans to break up with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 967

You deserved it 4 007

kewlcat 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 0:55

hahaha sucks ps. never go on speakerphone with your boyfriend with friends around. also its better than him texting you..i guess

ChasinParkedCars 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 0:57

Is it just me or did she just call her ex "tiger"?

Comments

mcguyver98 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 6:14

good ridence!

Signposthead 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 6:44

Hey, she called him Tiger? How is that YDI, he could be Tiger Woods...

Mancubus 2

Tuesday 11 August 2009 7:15

I guess your friend won...

Shyman4ever 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 7:16

Maybe tiger is his real name like Tiger Woods. Btw, FAIL!!!

another_guy 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 7:18

that's why you never boast with your relationships!

lovelykendra5 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 7:46

I still think you have the better boyfriend.

pyros09 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 10:25

ahaha WIN

senior_dingdong 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 13:26

anyone legally named "tiger" is my idol

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Tuesday 11 August 2009 11:14

Oh, and FMLs naturally run in cycles. Haven't you ever read one, thought "Something like that happened to me!", then submitted your similar story? Not all FMLs actually happened today.

senior_dingdong 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 13:28

did "lion" dump you the same way? negative on the trolling affirmative on the bitterness radar - mine just blew up

xoxoCheer 0

Tuesday 11 August 2009 14:27

Guess your friend won.. Anyone with the name Tiger is pretty awesome! But it's a sucky pet name.. That's what my dad called my brother. Weird! And at least it's better than him texting you.. Ya know, too scared to say it.