Public announcement

By Pissed - 05/10/2011 15:29 - Australia

Today, in an incredibly busy shopping center bathroom with my 5 year-old niece, I was squatting over the toilet seat to avoid germs. My niece then says at the top of her voice, "Auntie, why are you sitting like a kangaroo?" I'd say the whole room pissed their pants laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 739
You deserved it 8 424
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Top comments

MarioDragon 14

Just put toilet paper on the seat and take a shower when you get home

81 2
deviable 9

It's not like I don't understand why people don't want to use public toilets, but wouldn't it be easier to bring some toilet seat covers? Squatters often cause the most mess.

76 4

Comments

NomOnShroomz 14

This it one of the times where a penis would really come in handy.

37 0
Enslaved 36

Why would squatting be unhealthy? Guilty! I'm a squatter. Not because I fear "germs", I just don't want my ass on someone else's pee. I can honestly say I'm a pro and have excellent aim. I have (for the respect of the next person, even though it's not my mess) grabbed a large ward of TP and wiped the seat by using my feet. I also flush using my feet. Squatting is a lesson taught to me by my mom and is a habit that can not be undone.

6 2
Feklfekl2222 32

45- it depends, if you're in a clean toilet in a supermarket or restaurant it's fine to sit down but if you're in a tiny dingy pub bathroom that has yet to be introduced to a toilet brush and looks like it has a new species ready to dominate the world in there I would suggest squatting or covering with toilet paper.

1 0
Feklfekl2222 32

Sorry my iPod sent this to the wrong place

0 0
Enslaved 36

71fek Same thing happened to me. I posted under 45 DjeePee and it ended up here too. If you look, many of the numbers repeat so many posts will probably end up in the wrong spot. ****Wondering if the FML team know of this problem?(: crossing my fingers it will get fixed soon.

2 1
rldostie 19

Squatting is unhealthy, 54? Where are you getting you're health info? Out of your ass? Squatting is great for your body. It lubricates the knees and builds muscles in the thighs and tightens the buttocks. Humans were made to squat. The vast majority of women until recent history use to give birth while squatting. Not lying down. Squatting IS very healthy for you. It's only unhealthy if your form is way off or you have a preexisting condition. Geez. People will say anything these days.

0 0
G0t4acked 8

Put your hands on one keyboard, then rub your ass on another. Which do you think will have more germs?

3 0
noboundary 9

91 I read your comment in red's voice, :D I love that guy.

0 0
Bekll 31

Or an STP which is possible for females to mimic a penis.

0 0
swisher_swishin 3

Not the kind of sprinkles I want on my ice-cream

1 1
zachherbert 10

A penis comes in handy in almost every situation.

1 1
daftPunKt 4

That was the dumbest statement ever

1 2
TraceCase_ 19

I have to make a 5 layer neat seat because kangaroos like you are always leaving pee sprinkles behind. Sorry, you deserve it.

36 2
JinxosGirl87 0

Why is your niece watching you pee?

3 11
Llama_Face89 33

I wouldn't leave a five year old outside a stall in a busy public washroom...

4 1
SxeDaze 13

Were you pretty pissed? :P

2 5
feedle 1

You do realize that the "germiest" thing in a public restroom is the door handle. The toilet seat is sterile by comparison.

16 3
fakefantasy 0

yes but you can get crabs from sitting on the toilet seat...

3 11
jweezy89 4

@27- You are an idiot. It is possible, but the cleaners that are used on an hourly basis by law, are strong enough to prevent this.

5 3
TraceCase_ 19

No one cleans the toilet seats every hour where I work! You are the idiot if you believe that.

12 0
feedle 1

You are more likely to get crabs from sitting on public furniture than a toilet seat.

6 0
Enslaved 36

25, I would hope most people wash their hands after touch the handles. Not many can wash their bottoms after.

1 0
sweetheartxoxo88 7

@25 But they could take a bath once they get home.

0 0
NoNotTheFace 8

If you squat like that, don't you think your pee stream will change course? I don't think it will just flow down perfectly like a waterfall, like men, yes? And when your pee starts to trickle down the side of your thighs, I think you'll ******* lose it from all of your germs covering you. Delicious. Couldn't you just cover the seat with toilet paper and sit down?

15 2
nothingmuch_ 5

You do know that pee is sterile? (unless you have blood poisoning, but then again, would you take your niece to a mall if you have blood poisoning I guess..)

4 5
TraceCase_ 19

Fresh urine MIGHT be sterile. Inside the bladder it is, but it can pick up bacteria on the way out. Also, standing urine is an excellent medium for bacteria growth so there's a short window if your planning on drinking it or whatever.

3 0