Animals: React content

React content

By fmlfmlfml - 02/06/2009 18:03 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunderstorm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96 969

You deserved it 252 017

Carnival of Disasters
Dive into carnival, where hilarious costumes meet unexpected mishaps. Laughter is guaranteed, mask or no mask! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By badmom101 - 16/05/2009 11:26 - Canada

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 700

You deserved it 6 402

Spooked

By Anonymous - 20/10/2024 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying to sleep when I saw a head looming from the darkness with no eyes and a mouth open like a silent scream. I just froze and pissed myself. It was my daughter wanting to cuddle with us. Alas, the bed was wet, so she got put back in her bed, while we had to share the sofa downstairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 261

By bodhimae - 03/05/2009 07:15 - France

Today, I was taking a nap on the couch when my 2 year old daughter decided that daddy needed an ear cleaning. With all the grace of toddler-hood, she stabbed me in the eardrum with a Q-tip. Now I can't hear her coming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 098

You deserved it 2 377

By Mom2grls808 - 19/12/2018 20:00 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap with my 5 month-old on the (carpeted) floor in the living room. When I woke up, my daughter had bombed her diaper, and her and the dogs were rolling in it on the carpet and tiled kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 193

You deserved it 519

By Anonymous - 15/12/2012 15:55 - United States - Amsterdam

Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 008

You deserved it 2 501

By shitface - 25/01/2010 10:18 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 570

You deserved it 3 446

By Uh oh.... - 05/05/2019 16:00

Today, I was awakened by a small scary dark figure approaching me while making creepy noises. I screamed, kicked it away, and buried my face under my pillow. Later, after braving up, I turned on the lights. It was my sick 3-year-old niece, now dazed and coughing blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 093

You deserved it 2 820

By time to buy a gun - 02/11/2015 04:22 - United States - Carolina

Today, I was upstairs with my wife when I heard my cat scream from the porch downstairs. I ran down to find her "puffed up" and growling on the floor, and a corner of the screen next to the door busted out. I still have no idea what caused it and my wife is now afraid to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 034

You deserved it 1 701

Merry Xmas

By Christmas sucks - 24/12/2012 01:03 - United States - Boston

Today, I was wrapping presents for my daughter, trying to be really quiet. Behind me, the cat decided to climb the tree, which then fell on top of me and I couldn't move. My daughter had to help me up. She now knows everything she's getting for Christmas this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 883

You deserved it 4 771

Surprise, human!

By Anonymous - 22/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I didn't realize my cat was sleeping in the room with me until she decided to jump on me in the middle of the night, resulting in a critical hit to my groin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 384

You deserved it 100

truslide 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:02

LMAO must have been a hard kick to do that and even then, why the hell would you kick a cat that hard?

uhmfml 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:02

I don't think your child will be crawling in your bed anymore for a while... if ever.

Comments

vicky8949 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:31

That's what you get for yeti g to kick a cat u failure!!! Sorry for ur daughter hitting the wall though...

mercedeslove 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:31

good, little bitch deserved it.

cmurphy44 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:31

Holy shit I could imagine that in like epic movie and stuff, nice job =]

littlemisslee 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:31

Where's animal cops when you need them?

taylor_xo 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:32

F YOUR life? F your daughter's life/your cat's life.

JessTrek 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:32

Oh and for all the posters who assume the OP is the mother/father, way to show your biased attitude. Some of you should stfu.

sivardhpets 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:32

You are a ******* idiot! how the hell could you do that.

Jennydew 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:33

YDI. Hopefully you learned your lesson and won't kick your animals anymore. They don't deserve to be kicked any more than your daughter does. I hope she's ok.

poprockxmassacre 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:33

I really wanna see everyone who has posted a "OMG U KICK CATS?!1" post sleep and not move at ALL in their sleep when an animal jumps on their bed. I highly suspect we're not talking a soccer-star-going-for-the-field-goal kick here, everyone.