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Self own

By Anonymous - 30/01/2025 20:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, thinking I was pretty healthy, I signed up for a 5K run. I didn’t train at all, thinking, “How hard can it be?” Halfway through, I realized I was in way over my head. I ended up walking the rest of the race, and a 70-year-old man lapped me twice. To make it worse, my friends made a banner that said, “Congratulations on Not Dying!” FML
I agree, your life sucks 70
You deserved it 672

Same thing different taste

First impressions

By Anonymous - 01/12/2024 15:00 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I joined a gym. I’m overweight and not very athletic, so I was nervous. I looked around and tried a treadmill. I start walking at a chill pace, then got ambitious and cranked it to a "light jog." Within seconds, I tripped, fell, and sent the emergency stop button flying across the room. The gym staff ran over and I swear someone said, “Well, at least he’s trying.” FML
I agree, your life sucks 480
You deserved it 116

Top comments

You got exactly what you deserve there, mate.

Stupid Bastard Syndrome. A condition where a person or persons do something obviously stupid, then seem bewildered when it goes wrong. There is one positive, however; your Darwin Award is all but guaranteed, and who doesn't like awards?

Comments

You got exactly what you deserve there, mate.

Stupid Bastard Syndrome. A condition where a person or persons do something obviously stupid, then seem bewildered when it goes wrong. There is one positive, however; your Darwin Award is all but guaranteed, and who doesn't like awards?