Intimacy: Shower sex time?

Shower sex time?

By mark - 31/12/2011 17:40 - United States

Today, my wife was about to take a shower, when she called me into the bathroom. She stripped me off and pulled me in with her. As I started to get into it, she sighed, "Thank god. You really needed a shower." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 694

You deserved it 40 243

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Same thing different taste

In the mood

By Steve - 16/12/2012 06:25 - United States - Oshkosh

Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 806

You deserved it 18 371

Buzzing the tower

By Princess ? - 12/04/2020 14:00

Today, I was taking a shower when my husband suddenly came in naked. I thought we were gonna have some fun, and so tried to be sexy. He took a quick shower and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 164

You deserved it 283

Let's get it on

By chief623 - 01/10/2023 16:00 - United States - Ashland

Today, I showered with my wife for the first time in months, so I was excited. Once we got in, she was adjusting the temperature to something more comfortable. She then turned around and tell me to suck in my gut. After I did so, I slipped and ate shit, smacking my head on the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 121

Romance is dead

By Anonymous - 10/10/2022 18:30 - Turkey

Today, my girlfriend and I haven't had sex for a long time, so when she got out of the shower I was ready on our bed to finally do it. Her response? "Really? Now? I just got out of the shower." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 501

You deserved it 491

Can't win

By Anonymous - 24/09/2019 22:00

Today, I was in the mood for morning sex, but my wife told me to go wank it off in the bathroom. Three minutes later I was mid-wank when she started banging on the door because I was taking too long, and she needed to pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 160

You deserved it 363

By FUCK GOD - 03/02/2013 23:04 - Argentina - Salta

Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 124

You deserved it 4 859

Romantic

By Anonymous - 22/01/2011 05:29 - Canada

Today, at the end of another long workday, my husband announced that he was going to take a shower. Attempting to rekindle some much needed romance in our lives, I seductively asked him, "Want me to join you?" He replied, "Sure. But first I have to poop." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 910

You deserved it 6 864

By Anonymous - 12/07/2010 23:15 - United States

Today, my boyfriend looked at me and suggestively told me to take a shower. He's leaving for two days so I humored him, thinking he wanted to do it in the shower. I waited for 20 minutes before he knocked on the door, telling me he needed to shower as well. He just wanted me to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 725

You deserved it 29 693

By Anonymous - 26/04/2017 04:00

Today, after not showering with my boyfriend in 3 months, he called me in to the bathroom and asked me to shower with him. After getting excited and ripping my clothes off, I get in and he asks me to wash his hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 704

You deserved it 887

By coolhand - 29/08/2009 15:13 - United States

Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 514

You deserved it 67 441

moop256 10

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:15

Your wife is pretty ******* smart ;)

that1guy1 13

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:14

Take the hint and start showering daily, use soap. You're lucky she didn't just hose you down and stick you with a bar of soap ties to a stick.

Comments

mollysbp 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:24

YDI have a shower everyday cuz stink aint sexy :p

kahnforyourmom 2

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:28

Welp...at least she cares enough to bathe you.

Pentium_4 27

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:30

what's all the FML about?!?! a girl pulled you into the shower with her! you go bro!

asnell98 8

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:36

I think it was the part about him being smelly that made it less sexy..

thenoobftw 3

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:34

False hopes!

lefran 5

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:38

You wish

iPfreeee 3

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:40

Maybe u should wash your balls more often...

GoW_Chick 14

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:40

Your wife sounds like she has a good sense of humor, now you're clean and plus you got to have sexy shower time :)

kaybaby123 0

Monday 2 January 2012 4:03

How are you sure it was a joke lol..

supahcoolperson 0

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:43

Exactly! how is this a bad thing?! your wife pulled you in the shower! lol good for you ;D

ManWhatsoever 6

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:45

You're lucky. she's a nicest wife. Stripping her way to tell you that you r smelly :)

mrssuarez2011 12

Sunday 1 January 2012 3:36

And he's complaining

stfu_bam 5

Sunday 1 January 2012 2:59

And you're complaining why?

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend will only have sex when she's on her period, because it's the only time she gets horny. She also gets body acne, bloating, and utterly foul BO and gas. The sex is so unpleasant, I'm starting to wish she just got cranky and emotional. FML

I agree, your life sucks 410

You deserved it 211

Today, while at the restaurant I work at, a bunch of kids came in. They all gave incredibly complex orders, laughed at everything I did, and made a huge mess by "spilling" hot sauce and water all over the floor. After they left, I was tipped eleven cents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 306

You deserved it 3 563

The Top

Today, I was paying for coffee and accidentally touched hands with the girl behind the counter. As I was walking home, I realised that was the closest I've been to getting laid in two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 389

You deserved it 5 030

Today, I had a wet fart with liquid in my underwear that I could smell. I let the one guy in front of me take the elevator so he wouldn't smell me. When the next empty elevator showed up, seven people started lining up behind me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 607

You deserved it 186

Today, my boyfriend's dick got stuck in the wrong hole. And by wrong hole I mean the pool filter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 398

You deserved it 2 187

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I had a penis, our relationship would be better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 192

You deserved it 6 997

Today, my dog died. We planned to get her cremated and keep the ashes. My sister put forward the idea of putting the ashes in our food so our dog can be "inside of us, always." She's completely serious. I'm scared to eat food from her now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 375

You deserved it 2 477

Today, my boyfriend told me that we can’t be together because I’m not the person he fell in love with since I don’t do anything all day. I’m 6 months pregnant and on bed rest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 644

You deserved it 454