Silver linings

By Anonymous - 16/12/2009 19:28 - United States

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me that he will never marry me because we are different ethnicities and his parents don't approve. I was of course very upset and crying. His way to comfort me was by saying, "Don't worry, I will always cheat on my wife with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks 47 214
You deserved it 3 752
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Top comments

blackturquoise08 0

GET OUT, CHEAT ON HIS WIFE? POOR WOMAN THAT MARRIES HIM! Find someone who isnt attachted at the umbilical cord to their racist parents and will marry you despite what people think

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Comments

unknownuser1234 0

Individuals who have asserted that there are plenty of other women out there for the OP’s ex-boyfriend (I hope) and have claimed that he should be more concerned with not being disowned by his parents, I would advise you to pay careful attention to comments that have suggested that it is time to cut the umbilical cord. I believe in the value of family with every fiber of my being, but at some point in time, you have to set aside what other people believe is best for you and do what you believe is best for you, especially when the subject matter pertains to something as serious as marriage. Whether or not you are man or woman enough to acknowledge this cruel fact, you are willing to marry someone you care less about for your parent’s sake. This cruel to all individuals involved in your wicked game of pretense, especially the girl you make your wife and the girl you do not. Personally, I would be very hurt if I was the wife and knew that my husband married me, not because he GENINUELY wanted to, but because he would be applauded by his lovely parents. If that isn’t enough to move you, realize that your parents have already made their choice and it is now time for you to make your choice. They have lived their life. Live your life with the person you really want to live it with. Have a family with the person you really want to have a family with. You will be far happier waking up to a wife and family you love than you would be waking up to a wife and family you love mainly because she is your “own kind.”

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9k5 0

Wait, is he married already or is he saying he won't marry you, but he'll keep dating you when he gets married...?

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ashiiya 0

Wow I'm gonna be honest and say that he should just die. I mean, it's better to know now then find out randomly later, but still, that's just wrong.

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Lisa89 3

FYL for having a sucky boyfriend. I'm sorry. If he really did love you he wouldn't care what his parents thought.

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mbii 0

It doesn't matter one bit what he thinks/cares, in some cultures (and I'm guessing this guy comes from one of them), the parents get the final say on who you marry. I'm not saying that makes it ok or anything but you guys are all going on as if this poor dude even has a choice. Chances are he probably doesn't.

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unknownuser1234 0

Though the OP’s boyfriend may have "no choice" as to who he marries - he definitely does have a choice, the consequences for the choices are just not in his favor - the OP’s boyfriend has made a conscious decision to get involved with a girl he will never allow himself to truly care for. For this reason, many other people and I are opposing the OP’s boyfriend. If he knew that he would not be willing to abandon his values, culture, family, etc, for the OP, he should have told her before they started dating. By tell her, I mean tell her the truth. It is not alright to manipulate someone for your own pleasure; pretending that you would give up your values, culture, family, etc to be with your partner definitely counts as manipulating them. Never informing them that these things mattered to you, and allowing them to think that they actually have a chance at being your wife counts as manipulating them. He made a choice to disregard all of the things of great importance to him for the year they dated. The OP should have had the opportunity to make a choice whether to date him knowing that the relationship would be short term.

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Taravampire 0

your boyfriend sucks at consoling. im sorry. (_/) (O.O) ( ) (")_(")

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dragonflygal 0

time to move on...

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mbii 0

is there some sort of troll academy or something where that annoying and pathetic excuse for logic is drilled into your heads or something? or do all you assholes just have ESP?

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mbii 0

I find it funny how none of you guys remotely grasp the situation. I'd bet tomorrow's lunch that the guy in question has either Indian/Paki or Arab parents. Convincing them to let you marry a girl of a different ethnicity is like Hitler having shots at the bar with Anne Frank. In other words, don't count on it happening.

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eean 0

I don't care what ethnicity the guy is. He is obviously a big time racist himself (and also just a douche bag for using a girlfriend for just sex for year+). The message is from America, you certainly don't have to marry who you parents tell you to marry here. You don't have to "convince" anyone to "let" you marry. It's also possible that he isn't a racist, but is pretending to be one to dump this girl. That's some backwards logic, but its possible, people do silly things when they are trying to dump someone.

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Flutist 3

should have used a build-break-up-bear.

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Cherrybomb08 0

YOU ARE CORRECT. HE IS ARABIC.

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unknownuser1234 0

The situation is far from great, but the conversations that this FML has sparked are excellent. I have learned so much from reading over other individuals comments; you all have wonderful perspectives and wonderful ways of articulating them. By far, out of all the other FML’s I have read, this FML has generated the most thoughtful comments. I've been waiting to converse about this matter for a very long. :).Thanks OP. Thanks commenter’s. I'm more opened minded and I'm beginning to get over a similar situation in which I, too, was an unfortunate victim of circumstance (preserving values, culture, legacy, family, etc).

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