Intimacy: So hot

So hot

By bonesniffer - 16/09/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, I crawled into bed, naked, wanting to get some, and hoping to surprise my boyfriend who's always complaining that I don't sleep naked. When he finally got into bed he rolled over, touched my bare ass, and said "Oh…" then rolled back over and went to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 841

You deserved it 6 060

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/12/2009 08:29 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend was sleeping, I got naked and sat on top of him. He woke up and I asked him if he would rather stay awake or go back to sleep, in hopes that he would stay awake and want to do some naughty stuff with me. His response? To grab my butt, and then go back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 336

You deserved it 19 978

By left out wet - 22/06/2019 22:08

Today, I was laying in bed completely naked, uncovered and waiting for my husband to walk in. He laid down in bed and starting playing with his phone instead of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 734

You deserved it 246

By coldwetnose - 09/05/2011 06:08 - United States

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 226

You deserved it 18 912

Make your mind up!

By nextcontestant16 - 19/11/2012 15:12 - United States

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 596

You deserved it 5 125

Crazy nights

By Ugh... - 20/07/2010 08:15 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house. Expecting to get a little action, I was surprised to find that he had fallen asleep while I was showering. I spent my night watching television and browsing the internet while he snored. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 566

You deserved it 10 079

That was quick

By Anonymous - 09/09/2012 12:03 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 569

You deserved it 6 833

By horny21 - 21/02/2010 08:19 - Canada

Today, I was laying on the bed, naked, waiting for my boyfriend to come home since we haven't had sex in almost a month. Hearing him come in, I struck my sexiest pose. He walked into our room and tossed his backpack at me. Not only did we not have sex, his backpack gave me a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 520

You deserved it 4 038

By princess - 17/03/2009 05:06 - Canada

Today, I texted my boyfriend of 6 months saying that I was in the mood, and that I was in bed, and naked. He texted back saying "U got fingers, use them, im going to bed xoxo". FML

I agree, your life sucks 151 964

You deserved it 40 648

Nobody's fooled

By sandy - 17/03/2009 21:25 - United States

Today, I was completely naked in my boyfriend's bed. Suddenly his mom yelled that she was coming in so that she could get to the attic. I pulled a blanket up to my neck, hoping she would think I was just cold. She had to step over my bra and panties on her way to the attic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 175

You deserved it 90 740

Manchild

By Anonymous - 02/11/2021 05:00

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years thought it would be funny to squat above my head completely naked while I was sleeping. When I woke up, his asshole and ball sack was in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 387

You deserved it 296

sourgirl101 28

Thursday 16 September 2010 12:16

I feel sorry for your boyfriend if you expect him to do all the work. Ummm you need to do more then just show up naked!

sourgirl101 28

Thursday 16 September 2010 12:51

WTF So he's cheating because he didn't have sex with you one time? What have you been smoking in that blunt?

Comments

deathcoreislife 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 13:04

lol "oh"

KaleidoscopePope 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 13:08

what an ass..your boyfriend that is..

bayonet 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 13:26

I have to agree with 12. Men can't read minds.

donicus 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 13:36

maybe you should have gone down onbhim first.

JC_64 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 13:40

if all he said was "oh" then mayb sumthinn is wrong wit ur ass.... is it hairy? is it flabby? is it too big? is it too firm? lmfaooo I'mma b laughing bout this alll day:D thanxz op

AaliyahMorgan143 5

Saturday 4 August 2012 18:09

To a guy. No ass is too big. -_____- *sigh* men.

Elbaja 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 13:41

Sounds to me like he's not getting something he needs and took that moment to show you what disappointment feels like.

ironhead_fml 20

Thursday 16 September 2010 13:45

you can sleep nekked in my bed anytime.

123jeff456 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 13:51

you sound like my wife. do woman think men are that shallow that all you have to do is get naked in front of us and wham were ready to go. do think so. try doing something for him. I bet he has no problem doing things for you in that manner.

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Thursday 16 September 2010 18:57

No, not all of us. Do men think women are all the same? ;)

imright24 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 14:00

Sounds like he's used to not getting any. You could have started something before he fell asleep but it looks like that's not something you do either. YDI and FHL.