Intimacy: Sorry - FML

Sorry

By Anonymous - 23/09/2013 18:06 - United States - Olympia

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with another man. Her main reaction was to get mad at me for not knocking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 884

You deserved it 5 077

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Twins

By Anonymous - 30/06/2012 01:06 - Canada - Windsor

Today, I saw my girlfriend walking hand-in-hand down the street with another man. When I confronted her, she claimed she had no idea who I was, and the guy told me to beat it. Later on, she returned to our apartment and actually tried to act as if nothing had happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 913

You deserved it 2 949

Confuddled

By yosenfal - 28/04/2012 01:04 - United Kingdom - Plymouth

Spicy

Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 031

You deserved it 4 095

Considerate

By BadLuckLad - 22/10/2014 22:38 - United Kingdom - Portsmouth

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 387

You deserved it 3 890

By Anonymous - 14/03/2013 16:59 - Germany - Dortmund

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 730

You deserved it 10 556

By fuck russia and fuck georgia too - 09/03/2014 18:38 - Azerbaijan

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She'd walked in on me jerking off, which she said is exactly the same as cheating on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 004

You deserved it 10 361

Parental advice

By ifeeldirty - 27/10/2011 12:22 - United States

Spicy

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 102

You deserved it 8 900

By lolatmylovelife - 11/06/2015 20:51 - United States - Del Valle

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my husband going down on another woman. Instead of speaking, he looked at me, got up, and slammed the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 142

You deserved it 3 165

You sad man

By Anonymous - 13/02/2020 19:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend sent me a revenge video of her having sex with another guy, because I cheated on her. I got angry with her, but later used the video to masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 6 993

Life imitating art, or…?

By Bik - 27/06/2023 22:00

Spicy

Today, some filthy creep grabbed my girlfriend's ass in front of me. I smashed his face in, as would be expected. Afterwards, we had wild sex, then she cried, told me how frightened my "unprovoked violent response" made her, and kicked me out. I'm now in a seedy motel, wondering what the hell happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 069

You deserved it 411

By Katrina - 13/02/2011 22:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was busily having fun with my girlfriend, when suddenly the bedroom door opened and a man walked in, picked me up, and threw me outside the apartment. I was naked and didn't even know she was into men, much less had a husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 624

You deserved it 9 579

Next

Top comments

Andicc 19

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:36

Be glad to be rid of the tramp

misspulkadot24 17

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:38

I think she has her priorities off...

Comments

Rainhawk94 27

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:41

next time knock...that.bitch out

Dusty_Busters 15

Tuesday 24 September 2013 2:11

Well said sir.

911_Guy 5

Tuesday 24 September 2013 20:48

Well, that escalated quickly.

sunnyray812 42

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:43

Would've been better if you did knock...the door down!

Silentcrafter11 13

Tuesday 24 September 2013 1:27

That's not funny.

hollyanne27 9

Tuesday 24 September 2013 12:55

Not funny...but clever (:

sunnyray812 42

Tuesday 24 September 2013 22:10

I tried.

AllegroRubato 16

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:43

Ah! Good old deflection, a mainstay in the shitty partner arsenal!

ulissey_fml 22

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:46

Soon you'll be so happy you didn't knock...her up !

Little4Bear 10

Tuesday 24 September 2013 2:11

Semi-bad pun.. But otherwise agreed. Sorry that had to happen to you OP, but atleast you know her true colors. Hope you cycled that tramp out of your life to find someone better :)

thebomb553 5

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:47

That's when you act like some chick is calling you for sex as well. Oh, and please act logically and DUMP HER

Wizardo 33

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:48

Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks... seriously be glad you're done with her.

michelleJ11 25

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:53

Sorry OP :/ at least you learned that she was a worthless bitch before you got any farther in your relationship. There are NO excuses for cheating; I hope you broke up with her.

PenguinBitch 43

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:55

Looks like she got *lowers sunglasses* ....knocked up. Yeeeeeeaaaaahhhhhhhhhh

NoFlippinWai 24

Tuesday 24 September 2013 1:02

That... was horrible. :-) Try again.

Dusty_Busters 15

Tuesday 24 September 2013 2:14

No way that was rad!

allie2590 31

Tuesday 24 September 2013 7:35

*smashes sunglasses* Enough!!

gracehi 31

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:58

Seriously? Like, what the the ****? Who the Hell doesn't knock? Tsk, tsk, OP. How rude of you.

TyT63 12

Tuesday 24 September 2013 0:59

**** logic

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Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird Dating AITA Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight

The Top

Today, yet again I had to lie to a date about what I do for a living, because every time I tell someone the truth, that I work in private equity, they have some choice words about "people like me ruining things" and "ruining the housing prices." I feel like an evil James Bond or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 548

Today, I had to quickly back out of a Skype call between me and three coworkers because my fiancée came home from work in tears. When things had calmed down, I re-entered the call to find them unaware I had returned, saying how glad they were I had left because they all secretly despise me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 878

You deserved it 2 095

The Top

Today, some girl's mom gave me a load of abuse for endangering her daughter's health. How? By deleting my Facebook account, which caused her to have a serious panic attack. Apparently she thought we were best friends, and that I was ditching her. I'm confused too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 907

You deserved it 3 560

Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. In an ambulance. On the way to the hospital after being T-boned at an intersection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 644

You deserved it 2 070

Today, a customer called me "chink eyes", "dog eater", "bloody Chinese communist" and "ching chong." I'm black. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 282

You deserved it 3 718

Today, I was in a dating auction. I was bought for $2. The man who won a date with me recited every dialog from the movie The Lord of the Rings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 650

You deserved it 8 355

Today, I went on a date with a guy from Bumble. It was going well, with dinner and a walk on the waterfront, until he started complaining about skincare products, "People with eczema use that nasty cream, it's so sticky and smells horrible." I have severe eczema. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 91

Today, my cat knocked over a cup of scalding hot tea - but don't worry, the carpet wasn't damaged. It went all over my leg instead leaving a nice big scar for my holiday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 681

You deserved it 4 391