Money, Health and Smells: Stinky pits

Stinky pits

By shakinmahbuttbutt - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, it's been two weeks since my parents went crazy with their attempts to save on the water bill. Every time I want to take a shower, I have to ask them first. Let's just say I've had to resort to taking sponge baths in public bathrooms to keep my B.O. under control. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 858

You deserved it 4 565

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

Close encounters

By Pinkie - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I had to announce to the whole house that I was going the bathroom, because the lock on the door is broken. Before I had the chance to wipe, my dad loudly burst through the door, stark bollock naked, to take a shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 287

You deserved it 2 717

Surprising

By Anonymous - 28/11/2019 20:00

Today, my younger sister had some friends over at ours. I was in the shower but was horrified to realize my clothes and towel were gone. Figuring that she took them, I tried to make it to my room without being seen, but one of her friends came up to use the bathroom. She saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 105

You deserved it 311

Hard times

By psychopumpkin - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Boston

Today, I'm so strapped for cash that I smuggled toilet paper out of my mother's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 671

You deserved it 7 460

Piss poor prank

By peedonme - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - New Zealand

Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 270

You deserved it 2 951

The smell test

By sosadstudent - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Netherlands

Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 105

You deserved it 4 461

Caturday surprise!

By keeperstride - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I tried to wash my cat in the shower, conveniently naked myself. He disapproved, scratching my man-parts and nicking a vein. I just got back from the hospital with an infection, swollen nuts, and a hole in my butt for which I had to get a shot of antibiotics. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 817

You deserved it 72 175

Thanks for the info

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 848

You deserved it 634

By Bareassed - 29/07/2009 04:13 - United States

Today, I was at a water park with my family. They wanted me to stand underneath this big bucket filled with water. I didn't know it tips over, and my swimsuit isn't the tightest, so when all the water fell down, my swimsuit bottoms fell to my knees in front of tons of kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 623

You deserved it 12 947

Weird flex, but OK

By Anon - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I actually took pleasure in sniffing my armpits after two days of not showering. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 352

You deserved it 42 188

Well done!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 609

You deserved it 5 045

Gixie 25

Monday 13 January 2014 1:21

Shakin your butt butt probably isn't going to help with your BO.

Omfgitsmia 15

Monday 13 January 2014 1:20

Almost sounds like my mom these days. Maybe shower at a friends?

Comments

IHATEFMYLIFE 26

Monday 13 January 2014 2:05

#27 Sorry about the similar comment. I didn't see your comment until after I sent mine and the edit time ran out. But you took the words right out of my mouth. I thought maybe I was a little insane because I couldn't find that word anywhere! Glad to know it wasn't just me. :)

bellles 18

Monday 13 January 2014 2:06

I'm sorry OP, if you have a gym membership you can take a shower there? If not that sucks, just go to a friends house, I guess.

Zebediabolical 39

Monday 13 January 2014 2:16

Take a Navy shower. Turn on the water to get wet, turn it off. Lather up and get clean, then turn it on to rinse off again. You don't need to stand under the spray for 10 minutes to get clean.

sammieshortcake 15

Monday 13 January 2014 2:18

That comment was literally a waste of my time.

sammieshortcake 15

Monday 13 January 2014 2:19

To previous commented-As a human, you flaunting your major is the most useless thing ever. Boom roasted.

Xotoolyxo 16

Monday 13 January 2014 2:28

Then ask them more often if you can shower, or try showering when they leave the houss

Etweens96 25

Monday 13 January 2014 2:41

why not speak to your parents about getting well water? it may sound like a pain but the truth is, it's a good way to save money! My family and I haven't payed a water bill in almost 16 years!

IHATEFMYLIFE 26

Monday 13 January 2014 5:37

#50 Not everyone has access to well water. If they did, almost everyone would use it because they wouldn't have a water bill anymore. Which would put the water company out of business so that wouldn't happen. :)

blackonblight 32

Thursday 16 January 2014 17:05

Well water has it's own issues, one being you may not pay a water bill but it takes electricity to power the well, plus you have to deal with salt and such. Lugging those 40lb bags around every couple months was not fun for a tiny string bean like me.