Intimacy: Stop talking

Stop talking

By -.- - 19/01/2015 01:18 - United States - Ellwood City

Today, my mother told me how long it took for her to have me. Not how long she carried me in her womb - how long it took her and my dad to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 039

You deserved it 3 032

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Same thing different taste

The truth

By Theaccident - 22/01/2011 10:03 - Australia

Today, my mum told me how I was only here because my dad couldn't pull out in time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 047

You deserved it 3 673

By Confused - 15/09/2009 09:58 - United States

Today, I told my mother that I'm pregnant. She went off screaming at me about how I shouldn't be having sex. I am 25 and have been happily married for 3 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 866

You deserved it 2 440

By crakbbyaparently - 31/01/2009 01:34 - United States

Today, my old man told me that he only married my mom because she convinced him she was pregnant with his child. In fact, she aborted a week later. "And then we had you instead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 839

You deserved it 1 891

By Anonymous - 23/10/2010 16:01 - United States

Today, my parents told me about how they met. I'd already known they were eight years apart, but I never knew my dad started dating my mom when he was 21 and she was 13. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 700

You deserved it 4 109

By Told_You_So - 09/07/2009 06:33 - United States

Today, I was in the car with my mom and dad. My mom turned around and asked, "Have you had sex yet?" I said no, which is true. My dad cracked up and said, "Told you so!" My mom frowned, took out her wallet, and handed him $20. My parents bet on my nonexistent sex life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 078

You deserved it 5 087

Harsh

By Anonymous - 16/08/2020 08:01

Today, my mom screamed in my face that if she could go back in time, she’d rather have put up with the 3-minute pain of being fucked in the ass like her boyfriend wanted, because then she wouldn’t have had 13 years of pain raising me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 919

You deserved it 340

By Christina - 29/06/2012 05:31 - United States - Aurora

Today, my mother decided to share with me that my father is impotent, and they hadn't had sex in a year and a half. Thanks, Mom. I can never unhear that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 489

You deserved it 3 101

By bitchasaurusrex - 15/02/2011 21:24 - Canada

Today, I was driving with my mother. The ride was 2 hours long. For the first hour, she talked about how uncomfortable sex is the first time. For the second, she talked about how I should take accordion lessons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 502

You deserved it 3 418

By crazy mother in law - 17/12/2012 18:48

Today, my husband told my mother-in-law that we're trying to have a baby. She decided to call me and explain in extreme detail what positions to try, and when. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 123

You deserved it 5 027

Not now!

By Ineedit - 26/02/2010 17:46 - United States

Today, my husband and I were going to have sex for the first time since having our baby, who was taking a nap. As soon as we lay down in bed, his mother rang saying she was five minutes away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 114

You deserved it 2 576

Obito_Rocks 6

Monday 19 January 2015 12:38

Yikes, awkward for sure, but I can't help but ask... Was she bragging or griping?

Darkness_Hate 29

Monday 19 January 2015 12:46

Was it the "sex talk" or her personl anecdote?

Comments

sam882 28

Monday 19 January 2015 16:21

My parent's told me I was an "oops" baby..

xninix_fml 36

Tuesday 20 January 2015 7:22

A lot of people are "oops" babies.

hellphone_fml 37

Monday 19 January 2015 17:40

I was a drunken night at a party, according to my mom she had "the best sex ever, then i returned to the man i married and never saw him again".

netflixislove 32

Monday 19 January 2015 18:18

It's so gross to hear about your parents sex lives.

milkman18 16

Monday 19 January 2015 18:48

They timed it?

thatcoolguy123 14

Monday 19 January 2015 19:06

Who times themselves when they're having sex? TMI

Cath_Astald 9

Monday 19 January 2015 19:57

well yeah unfortunately we often can't prevent our parents from spilling the unwanted details about their sex lives. I have that luck that I know how their genitals look, randomly drive my dad to the ER cause of "problems down there", mom often talks about how they get laid...and when I say I don't wanna know all that stuff, they get offended. Really? -_- so I know how you feel OP. If letting them know it bothers you doesn't help, then you can't do anything else but ignore it.

gintwinsmoore 20

Monday 19 January 2015 20:01

TMI...

AssassinD3 19

Monday 19 January 2015 20:13

Don't stress, I've had *cough* that *cough* conversation too...

speakfreely 21

Monday 19 January 2015 20:16

How long was it? Lol

Freda92 12

Monday 19 January 2015 22:33

Yeah, some parents DEFINITELY don't know what they can tell their children and what needs to be kept private. My Mum was once bragging my Dad's skills in the sack...I REALLY didn't need, nor want to know that! FML and FYL.