Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: Strange kink

Strange kink

By Anonymous - 28/04/2009 00:43 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend when we started messing around. Things were getting really hot when he got a call from his best friend, whose grandfather had just died. As they were talking and I heard her crying, he unzipped his pants and mouthed, "She won't know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 967

You deserved it 7 528

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Read the room

By pissed girlfriend - 25/02/2013 03:08 - United States - Celina

Today, at my grandpa's funeral, my boyfriend texted me while sitting right beside me, asking if we could have sex when the "family get together" was finally over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 112

You deserved it 5 623

Me me me

By perfectmoment - 30/11/2009 00:47 - Canada

Today, I called my boyfriend to have a shoulder to cry on because my grandpa died. As soon as I told him, he started crying and telling me how much he missed his grandmother, who died six years ago. I spent the majority of the phone call listening to him wail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 579

You deserved it 6 001

Fond memories

By -_- - 13/08/2011 00:05 - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend for the first time. I went down on him, only for him to burst into tears halfway through. Apparently, I do it just like his long-lost teen sweetheart did. I swear I could feel him go completely limp in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 841

You deserved it 4 639

By tdiz - 12/10/2010 04:48 - Canada

Today, I was getting frisky with my fiancée when she started talking about her dead great-grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 889

You deserved it 3 569

By TheGoodTwin - 14/07/2011 15:53 - United States

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has been having an intimate text exchange with a woman. She's the grieving widow of his friend who died three weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 361

You deserved it 2 813

By JessBaby - 04/05/2009 20:44 - United States

Today, I found out my grandmother passed away. When I told my boyfriend I began to cry. Instead of caring, he said "you're getting my bed wet," rolled over, and fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 000

You deserved it 6 577

Ahem

By Bucko321 - 30/03/2009 01:18 - Canada

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 724

You deserved it 78 322

By princess - 12/04/2014 21:01 - United States - San Marcos

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky, and I whispered that I love him. He immediately lost his boner, and a few minutes later "remembered" he had to be somewhere else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 588

You deserved it 7 162

By Anonymous - 25/12/2009 07:09 - United States

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend. Things got a little hot and I started to pull up my shirt. She screamed and told me to stop because the innocence of her stuffed animals was at stake. We are 18, and she was dead serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 601

You deserved it 4 113

By vadoodoo22 - 15/01/2010 05:02 - France

Today, I was chatting with my girlfriend and I asked her to give me her phone to make a call since mine was dead. A text came in from someone and the name sounded familiar. My best friend has been dating my girlfriend longer than I have, and she gave him head. I kissed her earlier that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 010

You deserved it 3 268

Nexxion 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 10:14

Today, I called up my best friend because my grandfather had just died. I suddenly hear the sound of a zipper, some moaning, and a dialtone as he hangs up while I'm still bawling. FML

MtVernonVA 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 9:28

Then what happened?

Comments

FoundManyLemons 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 11:23

DTMFA and run like hell.

CaptainJellyBean 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 11:25

What a charmer.

hk_fml 9

Tuesday 28 April 2009 11:31

wow how charming. So insensitive D:

boatiebanter 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 11:48

#22 "... and people would gripe if he left his girlfriend hanging when she wanted sex." So instead HE gets pleasure while he's comforting his sobbing best friend? I damn well hope the OP refused, because if she's any good at it he shouldn't be able to keep from making some sort of noise to give it away to his best friend.

ideekayys 4

Tuesday 28 April 2009 11:49

I wouldn't want to be friends with your boyfriend O:

EmbalmingTheatre 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 12:16

That's more of a FHL, for having such a jerk as a best friend!

wutupbruh 0

Tuesday 28 April 2009 12:27

Today, I called my best friend to tell him the horrible news about my grandfather dying. It was pretty much the first time I'd cried since i was like 7. Halfway through the conversation i start to hear sucking noises. My best friend got a ******* while i was crying on the phone with him. FML.