Insulting, Argument and Love: Tactical nuke

Tactical nuke

By Anonymous - 18/07/2015 00:54 - United States - Johnson City

Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting out, "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 671

You deserved it 42 598

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Same thing different taste

By FUUUUCK - 11/02/2014 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was Skyping with a guy I'm really into. I'm not supposed to Skype at night, so when I heard my mum coming, I minimized the window. She walked in before I could mute my mic and started bitching me out for flushing my tampons down the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 452

You deserved it 26 070

By c*nt - 13/04/2012 23:14 - Canada - London

Today, I was Skyping with this kid, when his girlfriend started arguing with him. They do this every other week, and there was a bet on when they'd finally break up. I egged the guy on and told him not to take her shit. She ended up dumping him. Now I feel like an asshole, and all for a lousy $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 215

You deserved it 47 249

By fucklife - 16/04/2013 18:13 - United States - Washington

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 542

You deserved it 5 210

By J. Homen - 30/03/2013 22:22 - United States

Today, the girl I thought I was dating got into a fight with me over the phone. She did this because she bet her boyfriend that she could make me cry on FaceTime. She won the bet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 859

You deserved it 5 795

Not now!

By Al - 19/11/2024 21:00 - United States

Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 80

Privacy

By whyme27 - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - South Bend

Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 917

You deserved it 4 473

STFU

By annoyedguy - 30/06/2009 11:20 - United States

Today, my girlfriend missed our date, so I angrily texted her, telling her if she can't make our dates then we should break up, and generally telling her off. Five minutes later I get a picture of her sleeping in a hospital bed from her mother, saying, "Shut the fuck up, she had appendicitis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 457

You deserved it 96 711

By a tad whipped - 28/04/2013 20:44 - Australia

Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 224

You deserved it 7 244

Ironic, isn't it?

By KC. - 25/04/2012 20:06 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 493

You deserved it 8 745

By -1 friend - 17/05/2013 21:16 - United States - Freeport

Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 330

You deserved it 14 668

cutycat136 28

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:56

Instead of saying something that could potentially turn into a huge fight, couldn't you just have said really loudly "I'm going to fall asleep on you babe, I'm sorry" to speak over top of her and then ended the call without allowing her the time to argue?

iwishlifewasfair 8

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:55

How to get a girl to stop talking to you 101

Comments

balake_fml 8

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:25

You feel like an asshole because you are an asshole

EarlFug 19

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:32

So you started a fight and burned a bridge when you could've just said "I'm sleepy" Um, people skills dude.

Sheh_fml 25

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:41

If you really cared so little for her, you could just have hung up without being (as much of) a dick.

knightmareengage 16

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:46

Dude just turn off your computer and text her that the Internet is acting up, but you'll talk to her tomorrow. Seriously who wouldn't believe the Internet is at fault?

Roxas_hearts 27

Sunday 19 July 2015 3:26

Yeah, texting her right after would totally make it believable.

Fmlsea 28

Sunday 19 July 2015 3:39

actually it would be believe since texting is not using the internet ! it use mobile data instead!

sarcasmwins 24

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:50

That's a dick move

undersea 1

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:53

its ok, we've all done it

slyde32 12

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:44

no we haven't

SPN_lover666 27

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:47

Really? I have never been tired enough to call anyone a ****. See, I am the type of person who tells other people that I am tired and will talk to them in the morning. If they still insist on talking to me, I put my phone on mute and go to sleep

ShyVi 18

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:52

No, I'm not an asshole. Even when I do something asshole like, it's not that horrible.

Jiigaaboo 12

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:53

Well you don't have a girlfriend now so that's a win for your sleep.

Tyrez 32

Sunday 19 July 2015 1:03

Maybe you feel like an asshole because you are one.

LilyTdawg 7

Sunday 19 July 2015 1:03

Why couldn't you just say something like "Babe, your voice is so soothing; don't be surprised if it puts me right to sleep?" And you're probably not a complete asshole. We all have our moments and at least you know that it was wrong.