Insulting, Argument and Love: Tactical nuke

Tactical nuke

By Anonymous - 18/07/2015 00:54 - United States - Johnson City

Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting out, "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 671

You deserved it 42 598

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Same thing different taste

By FUUUUCK - 11/02/2014 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was Skyping with a guy I'm really into. I'm not supposed to Skype at night, so when I heard my mum coming, I minimized the window. She walked in before I could mute my mic and started bitching me out for flushing my tampons down the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 452

You deserved it 26 070

By c*nt - 13/04/2012 23:14 - Canada - London

Today, I was Skyping with this kid, when his girlfriend started arguing with him. They do this every other week, and there was a bet on when they'd finally break up. I egged the guy on and told him not to take her shit. She ended up dumping him. Now I feel like an asshole, and all for a lousy $20. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 215

You deserved it 47 249

By fucklife - 16/04/2013 18:13 - United States - Washington

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 542

You deserved it 5 210

By J. Homen - 30/03/2013 22:22 - United States

Today, the girl I thought I was dating got into a fight with me over the phone. She did this because she bet her boyfriend that she could make me cry on FaceTime. She won the bet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 859

You deserved it 5 795

Not now!

By Al - 19/11/2024 21:00 - United States

Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 644

You deserved it 80

Privacy

By whyme27 - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - South Bend

Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 917

You deserved it 4 473

STFU

By annoyedguy - 30/06/2009 11:20 - United States

Today, my girlfriend missed our date, so I angrily texted her, telling her if she can't make our dates then we should break up, and generally telling her off. Five minutes later I get a picture of her sleeping in a hospital bed from her mother, saying, "Shut the fuck up, she had appendicitis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 457

You deserved it 96 711

By a tad whipped - 28/04/2013 20:44 - Australia

Today, I summoned the courage to call my abusive mother-in-law about her non-payment of the money I stupidly lent her last year. She replied, "Why don't you go deepthroat a cactus, then we'll talk about it, cunt." and then hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 224

You deserved it 7 244

Ironic, isn't it?

By KC. - 25/04/2012 20:06 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, I got into an argument with my mother, when she snapped and called me a son of a bitch. I said that made no sense, because I'm a girl, and it'd only really confirm that she's a bitch. She then grounded me for insulting her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 493

You deserved it 8 745

By -1 friend - 17/05/2013 21:16 - United States - Freeport

Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 330

You deserved it 14 668

cutycat136 28

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:56

Instead of saying something that could potentially turn into a huge fight, couldn't you just have said really loudly "I'm going to fall asleep on you babe, I'm sorry" to speak over top of her and then ended the call without allowing her the time to argue?

iwishlifewasfair 8

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:55

How to get a girl to stop talking to you 101

Comments

iwishlifewasfair 8

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:55

How to get a girl to stop talking to you 101

jayemerald17 25

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:59

Forever!

cutycat136 28

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:56

Cayers97 12

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:18

But his idea was much more exciting number 2

scarlett3diaz 24

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:56

just tell the truth !

grogers311 20

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:21

He did, he just said that he was an asshole...

DragonDude 24

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:41

Well, to be fair, we don't necessarily know if it was a lie.

amandathemermaid 19

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:57

That's because you are an asshole. You really couldn't have just said that you're tired?

Lalala579121 27

Sunday 19 July 2015 4:23

I assume he did, based on saying she wouldn't let him go. Still though, much better ways to get out of the call than what he did.

jingleejanglee 17

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:58

You should feel like an asshole. Next time, you need to assert the fact that you want to leave. Starting a fight would, I assume, make you have to stay longer anyway.

nfedrichy 20

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:20

What type of relationship is this? That was hurtful and inconsiderate. Hope he apologized and explained himself.

AdamPractical 18

Saturday 18 July 2015 23:59

Is it that hard to say, "I'm really tired can I talk to you tomorrow?" She will most likely agree!

Ms_ValS 27

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:33

He most likely already tried that since he said she wouldn't let him go. But he could have just said he needed to poop or something. Calling her mother a **** just so he can sleep makes me wonder how old OP is. I hope he's not like 13 or something. Cuz then the problem is the fact that he has a girlfriend at that age, period.

AdamPractical 18

Sunday 19 July 2015 3:09

I think that if he did he would specify that in his FML to add to the reason why he did this. Though possible, it is not likely.

thatonetribute 31

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:01

You should. You are one.

venterd 13

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:01

As a man...From one side I personally think that was one very impressive and ballsy move, however on the otherside not the brightest idea...I congratulate you

shay_serendipity 29

Sunday 19 July 2015 1:56

How on earth is that impressive? And it's definitely not ballsy if he couldn't just simply tell the truth instead of saying shit to start a fight.

SPN_lover666 27

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:06

So, you would be fine with some degenerate dating your daughter and calling your wife a ****?

venterd 13

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:02

Im not even mad...thats amazing

Ms_ValS 27

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:45

Don't ever be a best man. The couple would break up before the wedding or worse on their wedding day thanks to your "bad jock who took too many shots to the head" kind of advice.