Miscellaneous: Tension

Tension

By Anonymous - 06/04/2011 11:47 - Netherlands

Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said, "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 985

You deserved it 5 475

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Same thing different taste

One way or another

By embarrassed - 08/10/2012 09:12 - Australia - Morphett Vale

Today, despite having a mild case of the flu, I visited my boyfriend's house and watched a movie with his parents. During the movie, I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. Trying to hold it in, I managed to do the loudest fart I've ever done in my life. Everyone heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 001

You deserved it 6 135

By SierraDiaz2097 - 23/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Vardaman

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 621

You deserved it 9 662

Both ends

By Anon - 19/06/2024 12:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I was in a meeting when I felt a sneeze coming on. I tried to hold it in to avoid making a noise. Instead, I ended up sneeze-imploding so hard that I accidentally farted at the same time. The entire room went silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 441

You deserved it 130

Bursting out

By Myth Confirmed - 26/10/2023 16:00 - Philippines - Makati City

Today, I overheard my brother telling my son and his male cousins, who all think he's a cool uncle, that, "Only women can sneeze and fart at the same time." I decided to intervene, and gave him a scolding of a lifetime in front of them. Let's just say, I had to sneeze while in the middle of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 648

You deserved it 440

Blame the pooch

By anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 338

You deserved it 32 300

By Anonymous - 30/09/2013 16:22 - United States - Union

Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 363

You deserved it 8 110

Bad timing, dude

By Anonymous - 24/02/2021 07:59 - Australia

Today, in the middle of asking my girlfriend to marry me, I sneezed so hard that I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 015

You deserved it 150

Let it all out

By Anonymous - 25/03/2023 22:00 - Australia

Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 835

You deserved it 140

It's a gas gas gas

By Dani - 28/11/2011 12:34 - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 377

You deserved it 9 475

By mandygeegoesnom - 29/02/2012 05:30 - United States

Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 147

You deserved it 2 536

lmaoatall 6

Wednesday 6 April 2011 19:27

and you say, nooo, open your ears! it was a snart.

cptmorgan15 2

Wednesday 6 April 2011 19:41

Haha, funny, but a dick move on his part.

Comments

SiobahnR 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 1:19

damn u for having bodily functions!

xBGCx 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 1:50

LMAO!!!

cbizkitten 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 2:00

omg lmao

JGoD24 5

Thursday 7 April 2011 2:06

hahaha funny!

Schalmer 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 2:37

I have a question. Who gives a shit?

sueannpalma 7

Thursday 7 April 2011 3:46

lol big deal it's a normal body function if you don't release gas you can get horrible gas pains

Jrefinne 7

Thursday 7 April 2011 6:26

If you don't release gas, you will spontaneously combust. I'm sure your boyfriend doesn't want that.

Rosa_La_Hermosa 5

Thursday 7 April 2011 4:20

haha this FML was so funny hahaha don't worry at least you didn't also pee a little haha

xxdominicanqnxx 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 4:30

lol that's funny

xxdominicanqnxx 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 4:32

wow lol that's funny

edteach 0

Thursday 7 April 2011 5:04

so horses are not the only pplz who sneeze fart... interesting...

Keywords

Embarrassing Work Accident Health Relatable Love LGBTQIA+ Annoying Inappropriate AITA My ex Relationship advice Animals Cute Cats Friends Transportation Awkward Cars Dogs Money Scams Miscellaneous Kids Family Drugs Public freakouts Cheating Sex Intimacy

The Top

Today, I found out why the parents whose children I babysit use me so often and on such short notice. It's not because they have abrupt nights out; it's because their kids hate me, and me being around is their way of punishing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 334

You deserved it 3 790

Today, at work, I heard a weird sound coming from the ceiling. As I looked up to see what it was, a huge splash of water hit me in the face. I called mall maintenance to let them know. They told me they already knew about the leak… from the sewage line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 933

You deserved it 2 295

The Top

Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 664

You deserved it 8 162

Today, I almost burned the house down while changing a lightbulb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 591

You deserved it 262

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after 2 years of being together. The reason? I don't enjoy playing video games as much as he does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 935

You deserved it 191

Today, two months after forgiving my girlfriend for breaking my heart by cheating on me, I found out that she's cheating again with the same guy. When I confronted her, she basically said I brought it on myself and that I was an idiot for not dumping her the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 020

You deserved it 26 930

Today, I had sex with a guy. As he was sleeping next to me, I checked his Facebook messages and saw that he sent a message to one of his buddies, asking what kind of lotion helps get rid of crabs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 389

You deserved it 66 774

Today, we got a new employee at work. I said hi, and told her that if she needed help figuring out our computer system, then to give me a call. She promptly accused me of sexual harassment and filed a complaint against me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 803

You deserved it 3 424

Same thing different taste

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