Love and Drunk: Thanks, I guess…

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Thanks, I guess…

By Anonymous - 02/11/2018 03:00

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk from town, busted the toilet door open crying, and proposed to me with a ring and all. I was literally mid-shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 297

You deserved it 309

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Same thing different taste

By ShittyProposal - 20/10/2013 07:06 - United States - Columbus

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 275

You deserved it 4 874

By Anonymous - 12/03/2013 22:21 - United States - Berkeley

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. I said yes. This caused him to panic, excuse himself, then take it back via text message a half hour later, claiming he'd been drunk. We live together. When he comes back home, it's going to be very awkward indeed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 589

You deserved it 3 113

Nervous

By amelie - 09/12/2018 05:00

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me. While getting down on one knee, he farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 738

You deserved it 718

By cai - 29/10/2011 08:56 - United States

Today, my boyfriend finally proposed to me. He was drunk and won't remember any of this tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 652

You deserved it 3 857

By em - 05/02/2011 09:32 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend came home drunk. As he got home he asked me to marry him, I was going to say yes until he said, "Oh wait, wrong woman." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 306

You deserved it 5 916

By Anonymous - 10/05/2014 22:11 - Sweden - Lidk?ping

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 396

You deserved it 13 711

Party animal

By Laci - 30/04/2011 17:50 - United States

Today, I was stuck crouching over the toilet after a night of drinking. My fiancé walked in, gathered my hair, and held it out of the way. When another wave of nausea hit me and I leaned in, he shoved my face into the bowl and ran out, laughing and yelling, "That'll teach ya!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 953

You deserved it 23 226

By gp28 - 18/02/2010 20:08 - United States

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 942

You deserved it 4 014

By lillymean - 03/02/2012 01:02 - United Kingdom

Today, I reached a new low in my relationship: my boyfriend got so drunk I had to help him take a piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 486

You deserved it 6 116

By SeatofIgnorance - 29/08/2017 04:30

Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 686

You deserved it 5 005

acmariner99 25

Friday 2 November 2018 3:32

Well ... what did you say?

Dave_Davington 33

Friday 2 November 2018 3:54

Some things absolutely cannot wait, and this situation involves two such things.

Comments

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Friday 2 November 2018 17:13

Talk about a shitty propoosal. I'll see myself out.

BurnInDemonFire 35

Friday 2 November 2018 18:28

Please do. Immediately.

BloodyButUnbowed 31

Friday 2 November 2018 18:18

Well, on the bright side, you will easily win any "worst proposal" contest you ever find yourself in.

sunshineandroses 9

Friday 2 November 2018 22:29

did he remember it when he sobered up?

magnumpeyote66 6

Saturday 3 November 2018 15:39

We all must know Did you say yes?

1gullible_bugger 34

Tuesday 6 November 2018 8:27

you could look at it as a compliment. He's comfortable enough with you to walk right into the bathroom. Haha

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The Top

Today, I had to admit to myself that I’m not attracted to my boyfriend on any level. I agreed to go out with him because he's a nice guy, but the reality is we have absolutely nothing in common. Not to mention, we have the sexual chemistry of a vegan and a bacon cheeseburger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 1 072

Today, my very sheltered girlfriend decided to surprise me by cleaning our apartment. Although she grew up with housekeepers and maids, I thought it was common knowledge that you don’t try cleaning the bathroom with both bleach and ammonia. We still can’t go back inside our place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 671

You deserved it 180

The Top

Today, after finally getting rid of an extremely rude, abusive customer, I muttered that I could kill people like her. I didn't know my manager had heard me, until a pair of police officers arrived. He'd reported me for "threatening to murder a customer". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 016

You deserved it 11 145

Today, my mother said she called our internet provider, and told them to cancel it. In rage, I left for a friends house for a couple of hours. When I got home, she told me she was joking, and wanted me out of the house so she could eat all the ice-cream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 488

You deserved it 39 418

Today, I saw a Red Tailed Hawk land on my car and spend a few minutes looking at his reflection in the windshield. This was all really neat until I found out he badly scratched my hood with his large talons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 938

You deserved it 3 769

Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by bringing him some dinner. He made the same noise unwrapping the burger that he does when he sees me naked. I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 365

You deserved it 346

Today, I was stopped in traffic when a woman rear-ended me, backed up, and sped off along the shoulder, taking my passenger side mirror with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 032

You deserved it 148

Today, my professor let a guy into my philosophy class 30 minutes late because his excuse was, "Time is just an illusion." This is the same professor that kicked me out of the classroom for being 2 minutes late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 765

You deserved it 3 020

Thanks, I guess…

Same thing different taste

Nervous

Party animal

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