The great replacement
By mommy - 18/04/2014 02:31 - United States - North Andover
By mommy - 18/04/2014 02:31 - United States - North Andover
By divorced - 07/03/2009 20:15 - United States
By knew that kid looked familiar - 06/10/2021 17:00
By crzyry - 23/02/2012 03:49 - Canada
By ihatemyex - 23/05/2020 14:00
By notahomewrecker - 09/01/2010 16:07 - United States
By nil mil - 23/09/2019 22:02
By Bullet - 13/08/2010 16:28 - United States
By bad dad - 05/06/2019 06:00
By nowinshituation - 12/10/2022 07:00 - United States
By Anonymous - 05/12/2023 05:00 - United States
Children tend to break a parent's heart all the time. This will not be your only disapointment.
Without weighing in on the OP (because I have already given my opinion upthread), I'm rather surprised at the number of people who find it wrong or strange or disloyal to call a step-parent 'mom' or 'dad'. Sure, forcing your kids to call them that is wrong, because you can't force your kids to like/accept a new parent, but my SIL's kids call my brother Dad without any prompting from either of them whatsoever. It doesn't seem disloyal to me to call your primary caregiver by Mom or Dad even if they're not your biological parent. You can still love (or not love) your birth parent as much or more without hating a new parent.
Agreed in the case of the OP (though we don't know how new the 'new' GF is, or whether anything less than the OP's arbitrary amount of time makes them not new), but I was more commenting on the commenters who seem strangely adamant that they would never ever call a step-parent 'Mom' or 'Dad'.
Don't think much into it. I call my step mom "mom" and she has been "mom" now for 30 years as my parents divorced when I was 1. I call and treat her as mom. Unfortunately you divorced for whatever reasons, but whomever becomes apart of your ex's like will undoubtedly be called mom as well. (Especially with younger kids)
That's really hurtful, but kids aren't mature enough to know what they f saying and how it feels. Don't think too much abt it and just move on
sorry OP that must have been hurt so bad...
You should put your feelings aside and be happy your kids are being so loved and taken care of they want to call her mom as well.
That's not the issue though. It would be slightly different if she were actually a step mom and even so most step parents are called by their name. But she is not. She is only their fathers GIRLFRIEND so she has NO right to claim the title as mom, especially when the children's real mom is still in the picture.
Maybe it's because I was a teenager when my mom remarried, but I've never called by stepfather by anything but his name (and his kids from his prior marriage call my mom by hers). It's one thing for young children to call a stepparent "mom" or "dad", but a presumably new girlfriend? No. OP needs to have a talk with her husband about why the kids are calling his girlfriend "mom".
My daughter's friends call me their 2nd mom, but I have never allowed my step children to call me mom. They call me by my name. They see me as a 2nd mom (even though their father and I have divorced) but I have always corrected them if I heard them calling me mom. My boyfriend's children call me by my name and I've been with him for 4 years. I would never expect them to call me anything other than my name. I also want to state that I have a very good relationship with both my boyfriend's ex and my ex husband's ex. I try to be respectful of the relationships they have with their children.
Unfortunately kids are sponges and they will absorb what they are told or what they see or hear. I know it's no consolation to you now, but when they grow up and adopt their own ways of thinking or viewing the world, I'm sure they'll see and appreciate who you are and what you do for them.
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Damn, OP. This really sucks! That's not cool that your ex and his girlfriend are having the kids call her that especially if their relationship is still so new.
Youch! I'm sorry... At least they're taking the divorce well. Because the main focus NOW should be on the children's well being... but stillll! FYL