At least he was nice enough to spare her feelings. I give OP props. I'm not sure I could be that kind.

How twisted is it that your wife had you eat cat food ? But good choice on not telling her the truth

Idk, 76, how twisted IS it?

Best case scenario she would have tried to improve the flavor by adding arsenic.

Actually... he SHOULD have said it! She tried to prank him, "Prank's on you, honey. These are better than your original ones!" BWAHAHAHA.

how is he gunna say she needs it though

Hey honey, you know what would be great? A nice romantic couples cooking class. We get to spend time together and learn to make things we don't know how to.... Oh look. The BBQ class is next. Let's do that one first to see if we like the instructors!

I can screw up toast. Burgers are way outta my league.

Rocket surgery? Or did you mean rocket science or brain surgery?

People operate on rockets?!

Yeah...that was part of the joke. So thanks for making me point it out and ruining it.

It's possible, especially if you are not standing over the grill at all times. The fat from the burgers can drip into the fire causing a flare-up. This chars the outside of the burger into coal while leaving the inside an undercooked vector of E. coli. The fifth required ingredient is Vigilance.

Perdix, vigilance is required to cook anything. I can't add that to the list since it is an obvious ingredient in everything.

Basic rule of FML. Don't question DocBastard. DocBastard can operate on anything.

Rocket surgery? I didn't realize rockets had health problems.

Why can people not understand a purposeful malapropism delivered for humor. No way could people understand the humor in great old tv shows like All in the family. And op talk to the flies in your neighborhood, maybe they will chip in and buy you a screen door.

Nobody else uses Worcestershire sauce?

Salt...pepper ? I've never seen anyone make burgers that way...

#79, I use Doc's recipe (with my own Vigilance) and people adore my burgers.

I agree with DocBastard, It's not brain science people!

... for your submarine....?

Btw Jane's Krazy mixed up salt is absolutely the best seasoning for beef. I have converted hundreds to the cult of this wonderful spice.

I wonder what burnt water taste like :D

I have burned water before. I'm actually a fantastic cook, but on a few occasions I've forgotten that I was boiling water until it was boiled out and just a pot cooking on the stove. Whoops.

It makes me wonder just how bad a cook she really is; canned cat food smells like ass and I imagine frying it enhances the fragrance.

It does. One time we were cooking burgers and my mom leaned over the counter with an open can of cat food to grab a bowl for it... Gag.

"It's alright honey, you didn't burn the beer."

Burned beer?! Blasphemy, don't talk about wasting alcohol in such a way.

My cat has food that looks like meatloaf and steak. They're getting really fancy with pet food these days.

Yes it does (some of it anyway) so I'm guessing she used the cat food the way she would use raw hamburger and turned it into a burger patty.

What if she replied with stuff like "since you prefer this one, i'll make cat food burger from now on instead.."

than he would get all the necessary vitamins O:-)

It tastes better anyways so I'm sure he wouldn't complain too much.