Kids: Today, a five year old that I am babysitting picked up a knife...

By thatoneguy - 05/09/2011 20:23 - United States

Today, a five year old that I am babysitting picked up a knife and said he would chop my nuts off if I didn't give him his ice cream before dinner. Only 5 more hours to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 459

You deserved it 3 466

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Same thing different taste

By sumhub94 - 14/05/2013 16:48 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 667

You deserved it 3 921

By Anonymous - 02/03/2012 08:30 - Belgium

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year-old brat. He refused to eat his vegetables, so I forbade him from playing until they were finished. He stomped off upstairs, so I let him cool off for a couple of minutes. When I went upstairs, he had taken scissors to all of his mother's clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 601

You deserved it 4 432

Damian?

By Anonymous - 16/09/2019 06:01 - United Kingdom - London

Today, while babysitting, I got stabbed by a 7 year-old with a mechanical pencil. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 227

You deserved it 116

By whattabrat - 26/02/2012 05:16 - Canada

Today, I was babysitting. Everything was going well until the kid called 911 on me for making him eat his vegetables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 079

You deserved it 3 297

By nutsucker - 08/03/2009 19:08 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year old girl and we were eating chocolate covered nuts. She kept on chewing the nuts and wondered where the chocolate was. I told her to taste the chocolate you suck on the nuts. Then her parents came home and the first thing she said was "I learned how to suck nuts!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 530

You deserved it 10 867

By Anonymous - 10/08/2014 18:12 - United Kingdom - Ilminster

Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 309

You deserved it 10 043

This boy

By GirlinGreen - 30/04/2009 01:34 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a four year-old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me, and that I should go die and never come back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 451

You deserved it 18 512

Demon child

By Some Guy - 12/10/2015 00:54 - United States - Allen

Today, I was babysitting a two year-old. He was messing around with a silver fork and I told him it was dangerous. He then got mad at me, started crying, and stabbed me right in the foot. Be warned, even though they're little, they can still cause a lot of pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 366

You deserved it 2 771

By raquel - 17/07/2015 16:40 - United States

Today, I babysat the Antichrist of all kids. After the 5 long hours were over, his parents came home. Instead of paying me what they agreed, they offered to let me eat some leftovers of a takeout in the fridge. I'm so afraid of confrontation that I accepted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 156

You deserved it 10 176

Bride of Chucky

By spooked - 22/11/2013 06:20 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, while babysitting a girl, I told her to be quiet so she wouldn't wake her little brother. In reply, she told me that she would kill me, wake her brother up to show him my dead body, then draw all over my face. I'm stuck with her for another two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 881

You deserved it 3 811

1215116a 14

Tuesday 6 September 2011 0:12

Spoiled brat. -_-

Oceanborn_fml 24

Tuesday 6 September 2011 0:15

You're babysitting and allow the kid to get his hands on a knife? Please get a different job

Comments

perdix 29

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:09

Shoot the little bastard. You're in Texas -- that would be legal. OK, if you don't want to deal with a grand jury, smack the knife out of his hand with a baseball bat and make him watch you eat his ice cream AND yours.

indielove 13

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:09

So did OP give the kid his ice cream?

stevenmx86 7

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:10

Why did he have a knife in the first place?

corrinaswan 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:16

The kid got ahold of a knife how

THE_A_TEEN 27

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:39

Gosh, thank you for telling us information everyone knows because of the fml.

sxe_beast 11

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:34

This reminds of the FML where the kid told his teacher that his mother starved him because she wouldn't give him pizza and ice cream for breakfast resulting in child services showing up.

XenaWP 6

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:40

Why are knives in a 5yo kid's reach? O.o

MzMuLaBaBii_ 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:46

Lmao I love this story

CiaranPM 0

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:47

If you feel threatened by a 5 year old, you're pretty much a wimp.

potsie10 4

Tuesday 6 September 2011 1:47

Give him the damn ice cream dumbass its not like its your kid! plus he's threatening you with knives the ic cream before dinner is the least of your worries.