Health: Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through... - FML

By Rowansgonnarow - 05/07/2014 20:19

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 432

You deserved it 15 958

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Same thing different taste

By Justkillme - 15/11/2018 03:00

Today, I confessed my feelings to the guy I've been seeing. He confessed that he gave me chlamydia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 691

You deserved it 444

By unluckybirthdaykid - 11/09/2017 23:15

Today, my birthday, was going great until my boyfriend received a text from a girl saying he gave her chlamydia. Now I have no boyfriend, but at least I have the chlamydia keeping me company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 506

You deserved it 423

By clinictime - 11/04/2012 23:05 - Canada - Okotoks

Today, my ex, who I'm still in love with, emailed me. I thought she changed her mind about us, so I poured my heart out to her. She just wanted to let me know she has chlamydia, and advise me to go to the clinic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 520

You deserved it 5 044

Wrap it up

By Anonymous - 17/11/2023 16:00 - Sweden - Linköping

Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 643

You deserved it 94

By fmltom - 16/12/2015 02:21 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, my coworker, who has a tendency to overshare, decided to tell me she has chlamydia. I threw my hands in the air and said, "Stop. I don't wanna know." A customer heard this exchange and we were both written up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 758

You deserved it 1 685

Contact tracing

By Anonymous - 15/12/2020 16:58 - United States - Mechanicsburg

Today, I woke up to a text from my girlfriend telling me to call when I wake up. Turns out she had one of her friends over who tested positive for Covid and I was just at her house, so now I’m forced to quarantine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 953

You deserved it 257

By Anonymouse - 02/07/2011 07:42 - United States

Today, while I thought my brother was playing with my new phone, he was actually texting a bunch of my friends that I have chlamydia. He deleted his texts so I wouldn't see them, and I spent a half-hour trying to figure out why I kept getting texts of shock and sympathy. We're both in our 20's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 610

You deserved it 4 793

Knowledge is power

By andy - 28/01/2013 04:36 - United States - Long Beach

Today, on my shift as a nurse, I asked a pregnant woman what she would name her child. She said she saw the name "Chlamydia" on a billboard and decided to name her daughter that, saying it was "beautiful." I informed her that it was an STD, and she replied, "Oh, well no one knows that!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 355

You deserved it 2 848

By Anonymous - 15/02/2016 01:57 - United Kingdom - Hull

Today, after trying for months for a baby, I finally got a positive test. For chlamydia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 556

You deserved it 3 320

By Bilirubin - 20/02/2010 16:22 - United States

Today, at 1am, the girl of my dreams that I've been trying for over three years to date, finally asked me out via SMS. Too bad I was asleep at the time. She now thinks I've rejected her, and will no longer speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 733

You deserved it 3 951

Next

Top comments

toxic_walrus 15

Sunday 6 July 2014 0:46

She gave you chlamydia AND has bad taste in music? You sure know how to pick em!

tj4234 35

Sunday 6 July 2014 0:49

Hey, i just ****** you. And this is crazy. I have chlamydia. So now you do maybe. Also, Sirin is the best, she's so cool. I wish she were my mum and all.

Comments

can_you_not_ 10

Sunday 6 July 2014 4:47

At least it's curable... Sorry OP!

DarkPoet_fml 5

Sunday 6 July 2014 4:59

Hey I just met you and this is crazy. It burns when I pee it might soon for you maybe

RedPillSucks 31

Sunday 6 July 2014 5:10

Maybe that's the name of your new daughter?

Dif_fml 12

Sunday 6 July 2014 5:17

I posted something similar a couple weeks ago but his made it? Bullcrap! Mine was better.

tbart13 7

Sunday 6 July 2014 5:28

I really don't understand why people don't tell the person they're going to have sex with that they have some sort of STD. It's really messed up.

limabeans101029 20

Sunday 6 July 2014 22:41

She might not have known. Chlamydia shows no symptoms in 80% of the women who have it.

vikky538 28

Sunday 6 July 2014 5:30

well STD may be...

Strider207 5

Sunday 6 July 2014 5:44

I feel bad for you, but you really should practice safe sex...

kaoticroy 10

Sunday 6 July 2014 6:10

So here's my number

cheshireau 26

Sunday 6 July 2014 6:19

That's why I always make guys were condoms. I don't care if you hate them, I don't want what you may not know you have.

mannatee 19

Sunday 6 July 2014 6:25

You can sue for that, can't you?

rocker_chick23 27

Sunday 6 July 2014 6:49

What's he going to say? "Your honor, I slept with a woman I barely knew, and didn't use a condom." He will lose in court for being a huge dumbass. Not to mention the way the FML is worded, she just found out she had Chlamydia.

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Keywords

Weddings Awkward Miscellaneous My ex Love AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Health Relatable Mental health Therapy Argument Parenting Kids Thanksgiving Covid Medication Ironic Cute Sports Proposal Snow Cold weather Annoying Cheating Work Money

The Top

Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said, "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him every day now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 532

You deserved it 32 701

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I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

The Top

Today, I decided to work on my social anxiety by ordering some food. I waited in line, practicing my order in my head all the way. When I got to the front, I said my order with no mistakes. The cashier just stared blankly at me until I mumbled, "Never mind..." and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 184

You deserved it 1 607

Today, I went downtown with my friends. A group of guys came up to us and started hitting on everyone except me. Then one of them said, "Do you girls hang out with her to make yourselves look better?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 851

You deserved it 3 863

Today, I found out I'm allergic to bug repellent. So instead of having a couple of itchy bug bites, my skin feels like it's on fire and is violently itchy everywhere the repellent has touched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 873

You deserved it 2 971

Today, my fiancé got his associate degree in the mail. Wanting to surprise him when he got home, I opened it to display it before going out to buy groceries. His dog got a hold of his degree and shredded it to pieces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 308

You deserved it 1 790

Today, I was at a band practice. The band was talking to each other with language like "cadence", "resolution" and "consecutive fifths". When they spoke to me, they used terms like "tick", "bong", "ticky bong"; and "bongy tick". Musically, I feel like a baboon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 483

You deserved it 6 820

Today, I disconnected and hid the WiFi router and told my kids and husband I wanted an hour together doing family stuff. I failed miserably. Rather than spend an hour together, they spent nearly 2 hours separately tearing the house apart for the router. Now the house is a mess and I’m still lonely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 242

You deserved it 575