Miscellaneous: Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently...

By hardee fucking har yourself, sir - 07/08/2013 22:00 - United Kingdom - Stockport

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 599

You deserved it 4 048

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By toosmall - 31/01/2009 21:40 - United States

Today, at the urinal a guy came up next to me to do his business. He stared over at me, looked down, laughed and then left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 608

You deserved it 2 609

Stranger danger

By Anonymous - 20/11/2014 16:35 - United States - Calhoun

Today, while using a public toilet, a guy started pissing beside me at the urinal. The breach of bathroom etiquette then escalated to him taking a long look down at me and saying, "Nice sack, dude." followed by him finishing up and leaving without even washing his hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 563

You deserved it 2 814

Dude! Boundaries!

By devinbyrne - 05/03/2011 20:26 - United States

Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 743

You deserved it 3 761

By webperson04 - 27/07/2009 19:07 - United States

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 420

You deserved it 3 605

By Anonymous - 16/10/2015 13:31 - United States

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 334

You deserved it 1 827

By Anonypiss - 22/07/2015 16:21 - Canada - Pembroke

Today, I was taking a piss at a urinal when a fly started harassing me. I got so annoyed, I tried to swat it. Didn't go too well. I ended up losing control of my stream, soaking the guy beside me. He busted my face in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 645

You deserved it 26 667

By Anonymous - 01/07/2013 05:50 - United States - Austin

Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 803

You deserved it 3 912

Pissed

By TJ. - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - India

Today, my friend whacked me in the family jewels while I was washing my hands in our college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 671

You deserved it 3 079

By pissed off - 17/05/2014 00:33 - United States - Brentwood

Today, I was taking a piss, when a mosquito came out of nowhere and headed straight for my dick. In my startled attempt to ward it away, I pissed all over everything, including myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 708

You deserved it 14 969

By wurtabang - 09/02/2010 05:27 - United States

Today, I was at one of the urinals in a bathroom. A chubby kid goes to the urinal next to mine and starts peeing violently. Apparently, he was peeing so violently that it splashed onto my legs the whole time. I've picked the wrong day to wear shorts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 460

You deserved it 3 108

Kyot3 7

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:28

That's when you're allowed to legally beat the tar out of him.

myoukei 31

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:28

*Insert a string of pissed off/on puns here.*

Comments

Anai08 17

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:37

1. That's disgusting. I would of wanted to kick his ass, then take the money from HIS wallet and buy myself new clothes. 2. I'm sure you're a 'grower' and not a 'shower' OP. I'm sure it's a good enough size to please whatever partner you choose! ; ] 3. Isn't this breaking some kind of sacred man code to be looking at other men's penis' while at urinals?

banemask 14

Thursday 8 August 2013 7:03

It is in fact a violation of the guy code to disrespect the "eyes forward zone". You can get your mancard suspended for that

hcollins1 18

Thursday 8 August 2013 21:21

You never know, that man may pitch for the other team and needed and excuse for his wandering eyes.

Otaku31 19

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:38

Hearing stuff like this makes me glad I'm a girl. I'm very sorry OP.

olpally 32

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:38

What a dick.

Olympiakos10 15

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:38

I was imagining him falling on the floor while his stream of pee was shooting out really hard causing his body to spin around on the floor and then shoot him through the door back first. Bur that's just me.

Misskayfoyer 14

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:38

Why is he looking at your junk to begin with?

Olympiakos10 15

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:40

Because he's a cockbite

flashback.miss 28

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:38

Why would he randomly stare at a stranger's dick? Have him pay for dry-cleaning.

trbuson 11

Thursday 8 August 2013 5:38

That guy is a repeat offender to the urinal code of conduct.

ThePK 5

Thursday 8 August 2013 10:32

Exactly! Everyone knows that when there is no divider between urinals, then you don't go next to another man--one urinal distance between at the least!