Kids: Today, after 18 years of struggling to provide my daughter with...

By BerzerkelyBongBabe - 23/08/2011 21:55 - United States

Today, after 18 years of struggling to provide my daughter with the finest educational opportunities I could afford, I dropped her off to start school at the best public university in the U.S. So far the only thing she's learned is what weed smells like. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 312

You deserved it 6 266

New Year, New Blunders
Celebrate the New Year with stories of resolutions broken in less than 24 hours and memorable New Year's Eves... for all the wrong reasons! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

They'll have anyone these days

By Anonymous - 13/04/2021 23:00

Today, I asked my 18 year-old daughter to buy half a dozen donuts. When she brought them over, I opened the box and discovered the dozen donuts were all cut in half. She just got accepted into a prestigious private university. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 023

You deserved it 325

Boozehound

By Anonymous - 04/11/2020 17:02

Today, after being accepted into the college of my dreams, I found out that my mom has spent all my college savings on alcohol over the years, and she says that it's my fault for not "helping her get help." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 395

You deserved it 104

By idiot says "you raised him" - 31/05/2014 21:30 - Canada - Barrie

Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 186

You deserved it 7 997

Excuse you?

By done - 07/08/2018 11:30 - United States - North Las Vegas

Today, after spending years volunteering at community theatres and being accepted into a prestigious university for theatrical design, my public high school gave me a scholarship. All my mother could say was "I'm sorry they wasted their money on you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 274

You deserved it 212

I didn't choose the thug life…

By Anonymous - 20/01/2023 10:00

Today, it's my 37th birthday. I was an honor student in high school, went to a top university, accruing a bunch of debt, and got trapped working jobs I hate. All because my teachers told me I was too smart for state school. The drug addicts I went to high school with live a more stable life than I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 276

Thanks ma

By 1940s wants their attitude back - 29/09/2020 20:01 - United States

Today, I excitedly told my mom how I got accepted to the master’s program of my dreams. She decided now would be a good time to proudly repeat for the millionth time how she gave up a full ride to the Ivy League to marry my father, and I ought to be a "good woman" and do the same. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 696

You deserved it 210

Rip off

By sourgirl101 - 04/01/2022 04:59

Today, I learned that my daughter pocketed the money I'd paid so she could go to college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 232

End student debt

By Reluctant Scholar - 08/03/2022 20:00 - United States - Bloomington

Today, I'm in a US college. I could've gone into a trade or internship, but no one listened. Now, while my parents brag to their friends that their child has a degree, I'll probably be spending the rest of life in crippling debt, sleeping on the side of the road, and begging strangers for table scraps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 240

You deserved it 492

By Anonymous - 24/11/2010 04:41 - United States

Today, I received my acceptance letter to one of the most prestigious universities in the US, as well as a nice scholarship. I was so proud of myself, I eagerly showed my dad, hoping he would shed a tear or two. His only words were, "Just get a job so you can get the hell out of my house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 720

You deserved it 3 795

Networking

By grant - 07/06/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, the “lowlifes” from my school who smoked weed are all doing better than I am. Some have family connections in real estate or marketing; Others banded together and started now successful brands. My strict parents forbade me from socializing where I best fit in, so I have zero connections. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 182

Dalliance 4

Wednesday 24 August 2011 8:45

I am not surprised.

thatnucca 36

Wednesday 24 August 2011 8:47

At least it's weed and not sweaty man balls...

Comments

duzzyfucks 0

Wednesday 24 August 2011 14:15

Marijuana win!

cubancgar 0

Wednesday 24 August 2011 14:15

I'm in love with you daughter

TGRandom 5

Wednesday 24 August 2011 14:20

Essential life skill

rezzel 0

Wednesday 24 August 2011 14:23

i was 12 wen i found out wat weed smelt like n i dont even smoke, i dont see a problem

brianjman14 22

Wednesday 24 August 2011 14:24

Well, you ARE from California... What did you expect?

ohSNAPyall 26

Wednesday 24 August 2011 14:28

Philosophy major, is she?

loserman67 35

Wednesday 24 August 2011 14:47

Not to be disrespectful, but she probably also learned what a guy's splooge tastes like later that same day. Or, since she sounds like the expermenting type of person, she probably learned what a girl's coochie-coo tastes like. I'd say all-in-all you're in for a wonderful four years mom! Enjoy!