Miscellaneous: Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in...

By btchzloveit - 29/09/2011 12:27 - United States

Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in the military, I receive an email from my mother. Attached was a picture of a toilet full of green shit, with a message from my mom saying, "Seen neon poo before? Thought I would share!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 265

You deserved it 2 414

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Same thing different taste

By Alisha - 07/08/2012 18:04 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, I visited my mother's new apartment, and found a picture of yours truly hanging above her toilet, and I asked why it was there. She shrugged and said, "Because the thought of you makes me want to take a shit?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 176

You deserved it 2 345

By icyrebel25 - 12/11/2013 23:57 - United States - Mckinney

Today, my mom showed my girlfriend a picture of me crying when I pooped in the bathtub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 961

You deserved it 5 240

Join in the fun

By Anonymous - 23/11/2020 11:02

Today, after discovering my grown-up kids have sent poop pictures to each other since they were teenagers, I had an epic poop that looked like a question mark. So I finally lowered myself to their level and sent a picture of it to them. It got sent to my boss by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 1 649

By assassinmaster - 04/05/2017 04:00

Today, I saw a kid taking a dump next to my lawn. The good news: his mother picked up the poop to discard it. The bad news: she put it in my mailbox. I now have a pile of smelly brownish tissue-wrapped goo baking under the hot sun inside my mailbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 918

You deserved it 438

By Anonymous - 09/04/2015 15:10 - United States

Today, I got a 'Good Morning' text from my boyfriend. Since I hadn't gotten one of those in a while, I thought it was rather nice. That is, until I saw the picture that accompanied it. It was of him, sitting on the toilet and taking a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 657

You deserved it 3 868

Serial Shitter

By Anonymous - 24/10/2021 05:01 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, I got an email from a colleague with a picture in it of shit on the toilet seat. The email said, "Not pointing fingers but I left you out of the last email." I pee a lot and so I use the toilet a lot. I think everyone at work thinks it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 910

You deserved it 107

By emsbuffalo - 04/01/2012 06:15 - United States

Today, my mom came home from surgery. Upon arriving home, she flashed a paper in my face and said, "Want to see pictures of my colon?" My eyes are still burning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 224

You deserved it 3 132

Anaconda

By lizbeth - 23/05/2021 04:01

Today, I took a massive shit and flushed the toilet, but it apparently didn’t flush properly. My mom then entered the bathroom, took a picture of my shit, and showed it to everyone she knows. She doesn’t understand why I’m embarrassed, and thinks that I should instead "take pride" in my giant poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 954

You deserved it 234

Army dudes

By Anonymous - 02/12/2014 17:39 - United States - Glendale

Today, I received a package from my deployed husband. It contained a scarf, a letter, and a bag full of his pubes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 346

You deserved it 4 216

By poopexperttt - 07/09/2012 07:12 - United States

Today, my brother started a new tradition: sending me pictures of every poop he takes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 559

You deserved it 2 446

SCREAM4meeee 0

Thursday 29 September 2011 19:15

well, have you?

ceilingfans 1

Thursday 29 September 2011 19:18

Take that as a challenge. Im sure if you eat enough fruity pebbles your shit will turn rainbow.

Comments

Amy28_fml 0

Sunday 2 October 2011 0:35

did u not flush before leaving? lol

andrea1122 0

Sunday 2 October 2011 19:33

That's just so. Ugh. Im sorry they haven't kept up contact but thank you for serving our country!

viciouspanda 0

Monday 3 October 2011 5:49

Better than nothin, right? :D

viciouspanda 0

Monday 3 October 2011 5:49

Better than nothin, right? :D

KrazyLove54 0

Monday 3 October 2011 8:25

nice mom you have ???

stoneywoney 3

Tuesday 4 October 2011 0:49

And why isn't your profile pic this?

kristina1124 3

Thursday 6 October 2011 1:18

well it's awesome ur mom has a great sense of humor atleasthehe. and thanks for serving hun :)

allknowingbrony 5

Sunday 9 October 2011 22:12

What a shitty text and a crappy way to finally hear from your family.

clumsy1allday 2

Friday 21 October 2011 6:12

happens to me after two bottles of blue Gatorade. looks cool lmao. PS.. I love ur mom for that

jesse22493 0

Monday 5 December 2011 2:38

Don't get how that's an FML moment, not many people can say they've seen neon poo.

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I agree, your life sucks 11

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Today, on my way home from watching a movie with a girl, I began having an erection because I thought I could kiss her goodnight. She dropped me off at home, and with my full blown erection, I walked in front of her car with the headlights on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 433

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 081

You deserved it 116

Today, at work, I went to place a small item on a shelf. The shelf fell on me, trapping my hand. While lifting it, the top shelf fell against my chest and the products all dumped on my face. I then realized the shelves were only held up by zip ties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 851

You deserved it 364

Today, according to my boss, he could cancel out the chill effect of pot brownies by mixing Red Bull into coffee. Somehow, I think his wastedness was still noticeable, since he fell asleep at an important meeting and our main investor pulled out, putting most of our jobs at risk. FML

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You deserved it 91

Today, my dad forbade me from playing or listening to Queen because Freddie Mercury was gay. FML

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You deserved it 514

Today, I was jamming out and playing some air guitar. I somehow managed to knee myself directly in my left eye socket. I now have a hideously swollen face and a black eye. When people ask me what happened, I'll be hesitant to tell the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 841

You deserved it 24 513

Today, I discovered that when you suddenly get channels that you didn't have before, it doesn't mean there was a glitch and you're getting free TV, it just means that your son called the cable company and had your plan changed so you get every conceivable channel at a hugely increased price. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 788

You deserved it 5 285