Intimacy: Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while...

By cumhole - 10/10/2012 02:32 - Canada - Toronto

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 554

You deserved it 69 899

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Same thing different taste

Pull up

By ohdeargodthatswrong - 09/01/2010 13:25 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 479

You deserved it 6 198

By Anonymous - 22/05/2010 23:22 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 586

You deserved it 47 219

Didn't see you there

By eatmyshipoopie - 18/12/2009 15:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when my dad opened the door. I thought I hadn't been seen because the door was only open a tiny bit. I then looked into the mirror by the door to see my dad's reflection, staring at mine, horrified. I was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 666

You deserved it 10 159

Lock it up

By stickyface - 24/10/2010 05:18 - Canada

Today, I decided to be adventurous and give my boyfriend head in the downstairs TV room. Just as he was about to come, I heard someone walking towards the door. I took my mouth off to get up and lock the door right as he came. I didn't make it to the door but my dad saw something he will never forget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 059

You deserved it 41 813

Not now!

By XxDiabolikalXx - 24/08/2010 07:30 - France

Today, while having dinner, my boyfriend decided to tell everyone about our sex life. It wouldn't have been too bad except my father was sitting right next to me. My boyfriend's excuse was that he wanted to make my dad laugh. He didn't laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 813

You deserved it 4 327

Ahem

By Bucko321 - 30/03/2009 01:18 - Canada

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 724

You deserved it 78 322

Dad jokes!

By Chels - 11/05/2011 05:17 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 516

You deserved it 5 325

Mortified

By killmenow - 21/02/2011 01:19 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 000

You deserved it 8 945

Nope out of there

By twintowers - 04/07/2009 20:30 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 417

You deserved it 23 273

Cold shower

By MrAwsum - 17/03/2009 20:40 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I came back to my house after a night on the town. Thinking the house was empty, we had sex. Just as it was getting good, my phone beeped. It was a text from my mom, saying, "Quiet down. Even your father can tell you're faking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 110 543

You deserved it 48 717

RougeRamirez 8

Wednesday 10 October 2012 8:51

Apparently your mouth

gideeupp 9

Wednesday 10 October 2012 8:49

Lol not quite Daddy's little angel anymore.

Comments

lelo007 11

Wednesday 10 October 2012 13:03

I'd never be able to look my dad in the face again. Good luck not dying of embarrassment, unless your family is just that open. Makes me turn beet red to even think of that situation happening to me.

zuelhater 7

Wednesday 10 October 2012 13:54

So. How do you come back from that?

kkillaj 5

Sunday 14 October 2012 10:12

You never do. You go through life haunted by that memory

anencephalic 14

Wednesday 10 October 2012 13:58

Hey, maybe 25 meant to say that her dad would be scared for the rest if his life, never daring to ascend the stairs of his own home.

LuckyLynx7732 5

Wednesday 10 October 2012 13:59

Not only did you have sex while your dad was in the house, you felt the need to loudly discuss the sex you just had while he was there? YDI

doctorhook86 24

Wednesday 10 October 2012 14:01

I can't not favorite this FML.

IAmFromTacoLand 14

Wednesday 10 October 2012 14:06

Haha sucks you didn't see that one cumming;P

alexNEX 7

Wednesday 10 October 2012 14:18

Your an idiot. I can't even think of something witty to say because of how stupid she was. I hope her bf stayed there and faced her dad like a man.

Abfootball 1

Wednesday 10 October 2012 14:46

That's the funniest thing I've heard in a while! I'm pray for you ;)

madib1998 2

Wednesday 10 October 2012 14:50

I dont understand why so many idiots have sex in the same house as their parents

hadrian2012 2

Wednesday 10 October 2012 17:09

Because few round people can afford a home. And as advanced as our society is we are still biologically wired to have sex at a young age when we are most fertile, humans are not designed to wait till they're older