Kids: Today, after I bathed my nine month old, I laid her on my bed...

By raebay - 05/11/2009 01:23 - United States

Today, after I bathed my nine month old, I laid her on my bed to grab a diaper. I turned around to see that she'd peed on my comforter. I then put her in her playpen to put my cover in the wash. I came back into the room to get her, and saw she'd taken off her diaper. She'd crapped in her playpen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 913

You deserved it 8 367

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Shidding and farding

By Anonymous - 07/09/2021 08:01

Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 290

That's not a child, that's a bio-hazard!

By Anonymous - 08/01/2018 09:00 - United States - Thomasville

Today, I took a shower while my two-year-old slept. In the 30 minutes it took me to shower, get dressed, and go back to his room, he had woken up, taken his pants and diaper off, and smears crap all over himself and his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 780

You deserved it 818

Little bundles of joy

By SD. - 15/05/2021 16:06 - United States - Essex Junction

Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 174

So sweet

By Mom of 3 - 07/10/2018 15:30

Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 956

You deserved it 437

Stinky

By Carolina R-h - 18/06/2019 16:30

Today, my 2-year-old woke up from her nap with a full diaper, then decided to climb down from her bed and got stuck under the railing, leaving a stinky trail of poop everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 521

You deserved it 250

So sweet

By Aislinn - 12/02/2022 12:01

Today, my one year-old took his diaper off and peed on my chest while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 196

By Getthelysol - 10/10/2018 05:00

Today, I gave my 8-month-old a bath in the kitchen sink after dinner, like I always do. Today, she decided to poop in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 322

You deserved it 1 535

By Mom2grls808 - 19/12/2018 20:00 - United States

Today, I was taking a nap with my 5 month-old on the (carpeted) floor in the living room. When I woke up, my daughter had bombed her diaper, and her and the dogs were rolling in it on the carpet and tiled kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 193

You deserved it 517

Shitty situation

By Anonymous - 08/01/2022 05:01

Today, I went to change my one year-old son's diaper and it was a total disaster! He'd picked at his diaper and it came loose. There was poop all over his sleeper, and when I went to clean it up, he put his hands in it. Let's just say I threw the damn sleeper away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 219

The sweet smell of…

By Anonymous - 04/03/2017 14:00

Today, my not-quite-potty-trained toddler niece had a 'wee accident' in my bed. I used towels to mop it up and changed the sheets. Later, I had the bright idea to dry it faster by turning the electric blanket on high. Now my room smells like burned urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 947

You deserved it 6 560

UpYourself 0

Thursday 5 November 2009 9:22

Haha kids...

Krystakitty 0

Thursday 5 November 2009 9:29

Its just what Kids do...as a mom you sjhould know to put a towel under her if shes on your bed and if shes prone to taking of her nappy she should have had trousers or a vest with the buttons done up at the bottom common sense really

Comments

cheetahboo2010 5

Friday 6 November 2009 2:05

I wouldn't wanna poop in a diaper either. So, I have to say smart kid. Didn't vote YDI OR FML lol.

kayPandastyle 15

Friday 6 November 2009 2:23

#10 is right if a baby is makin it their mission to pee on somethin it will summon its super baby strenth and pee right thru shiz. they will pee thru a new outfit or throwup all over your clean shirt after you had just put it on!! lol babies suck sometimes but its just how shit is. and no its not a YDI whether you wanted a kid or not noone ASKS.." oh please baby shit all over the place!! for me please?! " idiots. and to the person who wrote this good thing you dont have a boy cuz they have lil wee's that pee straight into the air lol

FML1786 0

Friday 6 November 2009 5:17

lol and it only gets better, my son has taken his diaper off and pooped (or pooped then took the diaper off) 3 times in the past 2 months, while in the play pen while i was getting dinner ready,cleaning or whatever, each time he played with it and smeared it everywhere, one time he also played with the diaper and i had the gel crystals everywhere as well as crap, ah the joys of motherhood, and BTW those who said you are never having kids, i said that too, and well accidents happen lol

Gandalf_Baggins 4

Friday 6 November 2009 5:44

are you sure its a girl? he could have an inverted penis..... hahahahahaheheheheheh

suzieq57 0

Friday 6 November 2009 6:05

I feel like it's just time for these "my kid did something gross" FMLs to be retired. Babies are gross. Kids are gross. People are gross. Shit happens. Babies are practically required to pull stunts like this and I'm sorry that it sucks, but you learn to deal with it.

xApril 0

Friday 6 November 2009 6:07

That's kind of what babies tend to do. Parenting is not supposed to be easy.

Gibby_fml 0

Friday 6 November 2009 6:19

at least she didn't crap in your bed.

red_queen 0

Friday 6 November 2009 13:36

Oh yeah... Your life must REALLY suck... srysly wtf.

guy_on_the_couch 0

Friday 6 November 2009 22:44

I disagree with people that say this isn't an FML. Having a baby brings multiple FMLs.

crammer1 6

Tuesday 13 December 2011 22:48

I would have to agree...it's funny that most of these people who are saying that it's just part of being a parent aren't parents themselves. You can love your kids and expect all of the surprise body fluids in the world but still have your FML moments with them from time to time.