Health: Today, after moving in with a couple of vegan zoologists a few...

By Stevski - 11/09/2012 15:08 - Australia - Port Macquarie

Today, after moving in with a couple of vegan zoologists a few weeks ago, I discover that they don't believe that we have the right to kill cockroaches, and will not allow me to do so. The house is infested, and it's spread to my bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 277

You deserved it 4 019

The rhythm of the fight
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 17/06/2015 12:14

Today, my pregnant girlfriend and I moved into our first home together, signing a 1-year lease. Less than 12 hours later, we've discovered that the place is infested with cockroaches and we have a mouse. The landlord won't let us out of the contract. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 396

You deserved it 5 251

**** me, I guess

By Anonymous - 18/08/2024 18:00 - United States - Richmond

Today, after months of my girlfriend crying about cockroaches, I finally called and paid for an exterminator. Now she's furious at me for "making decisions for her" and she keeps pointing out that, since she owns the house, what I did was technically illegal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 554

You deserved it 125

Usually a bad omen

By Karen - 21/05/2023 06:00

Today, my boyfriend finally moved in with me, after being long distance for months. Our apartment just became infested with mice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 710

You deserved it 101

My little friends

By Annonymous - 18/10/2012 14:41 - United States

Today, an exterminator sprayed for cockroaches in my dorm room. After classes I got back to find three large cockroaches on top of my bed. Now that the exterminator has sprayed everything, all the cockroaches are coming out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 453

You deserved it 1 953

Bugging out

By Ernest - 30/11/2022 06:00

Today, my girlfriend won't stay over at my apartment anymore. Why? Because she saw a few roaches. Pest control comes every week and I spray every other day, so there's only so much I can about it. The worst part is now it's extremely difficult to spend time together because she lives with her mom and sister, who argue nonstop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 282

By merrymary - 07/01/2012 11:11 - United States

Today, I moved in with my new roommate. She's a vegetarian, and won't let me put my meat in the fridge because it will "contaminate her food". FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 738

You deserved it 6 053

The Summoner

By Anonymous - 14/09/2020 05:02

Today, I've lived in my apartment for over 5 years with no bugs, as I'm phobic of them. I broke up with my ex, who smirked at me and declared war. I now have thousands of roaches that I can't get rid of. Coincidence? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 174

By Sarah Ellsberry - 13/09/2017 16:00

Today, my girlfriend and I moved back in after over a month of couch hopping and $2,000 of heat and chemical treatments for a chronic bedbug issue. I just found bedbugs on my legs. We've used all our favors and have nowhere to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 123

You deserved it 292

By anonymous - 29/06/2016 03:11 - United States - Charlton

Today, for the third day in a row, I have been volunteered to kill and dispose of the bugs entering my apartment. I live with two "manly" men who can't use a flyswatter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 057

You deserved it 924

By TheRoad42 - 20/08/2013 12:54 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, when I got back to my dorm, I found a trail of ants trying to shove a dead roach into a power outlet. The front desk insists that there is no pest problem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 731

You deserved it 2 732

SilverGTP99 8

Tuesday 11 September 2012 18:51

Kill them anyway?

Welshite 39

Tuesday 11 September 2012 18:52

I don't care if they don't want cockroaches to die; I would go nuclear on those nasty creatures.

Comments

freddykrueger56 2

Wednesday 12 September 2012 3:34

Screw that. Call the exterminator

Tamz13 2

Wednesday 12 September 2012 3:48

Lol! If someone didn't get the reference they've been living under a rock. Too funny

augmented 1

Wednesday 12 September 2012 4:26

When you move be careful you don't bring them. Happened to me! Run away!

UltimateTanMan 6

Wednesday 12 September 2012 4:29

You deserve it for voluntarily moving in with hippies!

BxCat 0

Wednesday 12 September 2012 4:34

Bomb the house when everybody leaves and just pout and say " I didn't kill them the posion in the bug bomb did"

Brettersson 0

Wednesday 12 September 2012 4:38

Maybe you should inform the landlord, he might not appreciate them allowing his property to be infested with roaches

iHeartKitties 2

Wednesday 12 September 2012 4:45

Move out so you don't have to live with a cockroach-loving hippie douche. Or you could call the exterminator. And I agree with 178 call the landlord.

buca100 4

Wednesday 12 September 2012 4:50

Move the hell out.

n3rd4lifee 0

Wednesday 12 September 2012 4:53

Move out asap!

RoroRoxyRoo 2

Wednesday 12 September 2012 5:06

Time to call Billy the Exterminator.

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The Top

Today, I was cockblocked by a machine. I'm in the hospital so I'm attached to the typical machines that monitor vitals, including heart rate. I fell asleep and had a sex dream which made my heart rate go up, which set off the beeping from the machine monitoring my vitals. Bam, I woke up, sex dream over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 236

Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He said, "Yeah well, you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 956

You deserved it 4 151

The Top

Today, before leaving my house, I OCD-checked all of my doors 16 times to make sure that they were locked. When I got home, my house had been broken into. Turns out I accidentally unlocked my front door when trying to lock it for the last time. This is why I have OCD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 983

You deserved it 10 635

Today, I noticed my doctor has freakishly huge hands. This normally wouldn't have bothered me were I not there for a prostate exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 929

You deserved it 547

Today, after waiting a couple weeks, I finally slept with this guy I really like. It went like this: 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi, done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 159

You deserved it 4 804

Today, my dad came home and wanted to grab a glass. It wasn't in direct sight so he slammed the cupboard door so hard, I peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 596

You deserved it 176

Today, trying to be romantic, I started coming on to my wife while in bed, only for her to yet again say she wasn't in the mood. When I asked why she never is lately, she sarcastically blamed it on the government shutdown, then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 020

You deserved it 6 343

Today, my husband was using the microwave when we suddenly hear a huge 'POP'. The good news is we found our daughter's missing hamster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 507

You deserved it 4 763