By Anonymous - 23/07/2012 19:12 - United Kingdom

Spicy
Today, against my advice, my boyfriend decided to read Fifty Shades of Grey in an attempt to learn how to please me in bed. Now all he does is suck on my toes, and thinks it's weird that I don't spontaneously orgasm as if I'm some kind of nymphomaniacal weirdo. FML
I agree, your life sucks 38 331
You deserved it 5 375

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Elovena 9

At least he cares enough to try.

He sucks on your toes?! Absolutely disgusting.

Comments

I love it how everyone has a problem with sucking on toes but most people won't hesitate to suck a d**k

Merylwen 24

#68 Your comment made me take a double take at your profile pic.

62- Uhm, I'd personally rather lick a pussy, over a toe, over a penis, in that order, thanks. But does that make me a hypocrite that I'd rather have my penis sucked over my toe? ;p (This fml's getting a little TMI here, sorry....)

raraisbang 12

89, but pee touches vaginas and penises so basically you're licking pee - and before anyone argues that it is "sterile," no, pee is no longer sterile after passing through the urethra. So really, as long as the foot is clean, who cares if someone sucks on toes? Don't judge and call it nasty if you're willing to put your mouth on a penis/******.

blehkj42 0

Suckin foot doesnt turn me on really /:

Perhaps the OP could save herself future troubles with her boyfriend by doing something totally bizarre like telling him what she likes.

Amen to that one hahaha too much to ask these days tho communication has taken back seat to financial well being these days

She said "against my advice," so it sounds like she's told him what she does and doesn't like and he's just ignoring her.

She said, 'Today, against my advice, my boyfriend decided to read Fifty Shades of Grey in an attempt to learn how to please me in bed.' The above means that he decided to read a book against her advice. There is nothing that says that she told him what she likes. If she had told him what she liked why would he bother reading the book to try to figure that out?

perdix 29

Just hope he doesn't pick up the sequel, "Fifty Shades of Brown," unless you're into Boston Pancakes, Dirty Sanchezes and blumpkins.

Perdix, meant to give you a thumb up (on this post, silly!). Don't know why a zero came up instead of a one.

perdix 29

Thanks, you probably thumbed me up just as someone else thumbed me down. I appreciate your support :D

there's kinky and fun, and then there's terrifying!

RedPillSucks 31

Perdix has a thumb fetish ;-/ Who's going to suck his thumb which looks strangely like a penis.

Maybe OP's boyfriend is hinting that he would like her to suck his toes. As another poster said: communication would help here.

xXHollowIchigoXx 17

Sounds like a good book. o.0 I should read it some time.

challan 19

I love having my toes sucked on, but it doesn't cause orgasms, it just sends shocks straight to your girlie parts. He wants to please you, that's a keeper right there.