Intimacy: Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob...

By Anonymous - 08/05/2015 16:59 - India - New Delhi

Today, at a party I got blind drunk and I gave a guy a blowjob for the first time. I'm a 100% heterosexual male. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 215

You deserved it 42 518

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/11/2010 05:20 - United States

Today, the girl that I have been trying to get with for over a year told me she was drunk and just gave her first blowjob to some guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 623

You deserved it 4 799

By cumguzzler - 06/03/2009 16:14 - United States

Today, I was at this awesome party and I was dancing with this really attractive girl who started making out with me all of a sudden. Five minutes later, my friend told me that the girl had just given him a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 711

You deserved it 11 940

By Anonymous - 19/02/2011 21:29 - United States

Today, I woke up next to my best friend after lots of drinking and the best sex I've ever had in my life. The only problem is we're both straight males. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 100

You deserved it 44 835

By kklaucen14 - 06/08/2012 01:15 - United States - Connersville

Today, my boyfriend and I went to a party. He got drunk and started talking about how his hot blonde girlfriend gives him great blowjobs. I'm a brunette. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 081

You deserved it 3 270

By milkybear - 15/06/2010 07:11 - United States

Today, I went to a party where I met an amazing guy. After having great conversation all night and what I thought was a serious connection, I leaned in to kiss him. He screamed, forcefully pushed my face away with his hand, and said he was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 866

You deserved it 15 889

By Stupid Drunk - 22/12/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 070

You deserved it 49 569

Party hard

By Jason the flasher - 15/09/2018 22:00

Today, I went to a party that my friends were throwing. I had a great time and got blackout drunk. I woke up to videos from my girlfriend from last night. At some point I'd managed to take off my shorts and boxers and spent the rest of the party naked from the waist down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 399

You deserved it 3 262

Late bloomer

By Forever Lonely - 13/06/2023 22:00 - South Africa - Centurion

Today, I saw one of my best friends having sex with a girl at a party. It was the first time I'd ever seen a girl naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 841

You deserved it 246

By homewrecker - 01/08/2009 13:44 - United States

Today, I woke up from a night of crazy drunken sex with a guy I had met at a friends 23rd birthday party. The lights had been off when we had stumbled in to his house the night before. When I opened my eyes today, the first thing I saw was his family picture, complete with his wife and son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 075

You deserved it 64 024

By sexyfreak2510 - 03/09/2009 06:47 - South Africa

Today, at my bachelorette party, I got so wasted, I ended up giving my stripper a lap dance because he "wasn't doing it properly". There's photos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 305

You deserved it 51 901

anniemeece 23

Saturday 9 May 2015 9:07

Maybe not so 100%?

MegasaurusRex89 28

Saturday 9 May 2015 9:07

I don't know if "100%" is an accurate estimate...

Comments

kev1029 22

Friday 4 December 2015 4:26

Being drunk reveals your true self.

deejflat 17

Tuesday 15 December 2015 23:31

You WERE 100%

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Wednesday 6 January 2016 12:52

I hate to break it to you, but what you say or do when you're drunk is what you think when you're sober.

notlad08 7

Sunday 10 January 2016 6:27

I like how he said "first time"

wickedtv10 14

Monday 15 August 2016 23:36

lol i think not sir

ambeerr 14

Sunday 21 August 2016 1:25

I guess your life really does suck

Dubblosephen 2

Wednesday 23 November 2016 19:04

I understand. I'm 100% hetero also, on a 1000% scale. Good for you, better for him!

WarGod01 15

Sunday 14 May 2017 23:29

I guess you can say " That was a dick move" HAHAHA!

lucasj23 11

Thursday 12 April 2018 3:36

no, you re not.

peterblackmer91 12

Monday 24 May 2021 3:56

No you're not.

Keywords

Miscellaneous Relatable Awkward Embarrassing Health Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Love Work Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers

The Top

Today, while driving with my family, the car got stuck in a large patch of mud. My family of seven decided that I, the fifteen year old girl, would be best suited to push it out. After slipping, falling, and getting completely covered in mud, they finally called a tow truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 255

You deserved it 3 821

Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 597

You deserved it 73

The Top

Today, I was playing and laughing with my new baby boy. He was giggling, and it was adorable. Out of nowhere, I said, "You're my favorite!" Now I'm sitting here, talking to my two other children about how what I said earlier I didn't mean personally. They never want to talk to me again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 278

You deserved it 130 934

Today, my girlfriend left me because our "political views don't match" when I told her we needed to share house chores now that we live together. I know, I'm lost too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 515

You deserved it 2 937

Today, I returned home from a three-week vacation. None of my friends realized I'd been gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 464

You deserved it 3 963

Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 619

You deserved it 5 764

Today, I had a very sweet and romantic love note brutally scratched into the door of my brand new car. It was addressed to Cindy. Cindy lives next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 294

You deserved it 134

Today, I noticed a flashy car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 623

You deserved it 42 687

Same thing different taste

Party hard

Late bloomer

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