Health: Today, due to my allergies I can't stop sneezing. It wouldn't...

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By Anonymous - 22/05/2013 05:38 - United States - Livingston

Today, due to my allergies I can't stop sneezing. It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for my hemorrhoids making each sneeze feel like I'm getting a cactus shoved up my ass. FML

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You deserved it 3 868

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Same thing different taste

Ace in the hole

By Anonymous - 09/05/2022 06:00

Today, I have a hemorrhoid and a cold. Every time I cough or sneeze, it feels like someone is stabbing me in the anus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 98

By monkers - 06/10/2012 07:12 - Canada - Westlock

Today, I have such bad diarrhea that every time I sneeze I poop. I've discovered it's very hard to run to the bathroom every time I feel the urge to sneeze. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 271

You deserved it 1 782

By all arsed out - 06/03/2016 16:50 - United Kingdom - Spalding

Today, I suffered an uncontrollable sneezing attack. I have the runs. It wasn't exactly as bad as I'd have expected. Just a lot worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 661

You deserved it 1 560

By radiating - 09/03/2012 04:53

Today, my hay-fever started. I'm five months pregnant, and every time I cough, sneeze or blow my nose I either fart or wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 780

You deserved it 3 220

By Anonymous - 23/06/2019 20:30

Today, I was on my way to work. Out of nowhere, my period started. Due to allergies, I had uncontrollable sneezes. Now, I have blood all over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 021

You deserved it 145

Side effects

By Anonymous - 19/06/2021 18:59 - United Kingdom - Runcorn

Today, I sneezed so hard, I farted. During my vaccine appointment. I hate hayfever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 146

By Anonymous - 26/04/2016 08:00 - Spain

Today, my seasonal allergies started. Most annoying thing by far this allergy season? I only get the urge to sneeze when I have food in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 607

You deserved it 1 782

That blows

By Oww - 23/07/2022 22:00 - United States

Today, I have a zit on the edge of my nostril, along with severe allergies. I can no longer tell if my tears are from pain or hay fever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 96

Bless you

By Achoo - 31/01/2023 02:30

Today, I've been having really bad seasonal allergies. I was at work, and feeling just about to sneeze for at least a full minute, but thought I could stop it. A customer came up to me, I opened my mouth to greet her… but instead sneezed right in her face. Several seconds before my addled brain caught up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 713

You deserved it 192

Say it, don't spray it

By Anonymous - 05/10/2024 06:00 - United States - Warren

Today, as I was trying to get into the grocery store, I had a sneezing fit. I've typically never had one, so I didn't really know how to handle it. This one was a new record: 11 sneezes and I hadn't had the foresight to bring tissues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 338

You deserved it 98

greeneyesFTWlol 8

Wednesday 22 May 2013 12:07

My booty just tightened up from reading this.

fsomelife 26

Wednesday 22 May 2013 12:12

I guess either your nose regrets what your ass does, or your ass regrets what your nose does.

Comments

perdix 29

Wednesday 22 May 2013 13:40

You ought to shove a cucumber halfway up your ass to hold your 'roids still when you sneeze. And it will reduce the swelling which is while people put cucumber slices on their eyelids. I don't know if it will work, but I'd sure like to see you walking around. :D

Kitten_Calderon 14

Wednesday 22 May 2013 14:00

Geez OP, I Am so sorry you are going through these. I hope you find ways to remedy both your allergies and your hemorrhoids.. At least the hemorrhoids would be nice if they went away.. I'd pick allergies over those any day

aidem1988 7

Wednesday 22 May 2013 14:43

it is time for operation ass cream!

Jemm_fml 29

Wednesday 22 May 2013 14:49

Ow, my anus :( Man, I laughed but this is some seriously painful stuff. FYL, OP. Get some prep.H!

JennNoVa 8

Wednesday 22 May 2013 14:53

Time to get a referral from your doctor to a surgeon for those hemorrhoids. Insurance will cover it and you'll be glad you did it!

JoshuahColins 19

Wednesday 22 May 2013 15:02

Oh that's nasty...

olpally 32

Wednesday 22 May 2013 15:13

That's an interesting visual... Can't you get some sort of cream for the hemorrhoids? Or better yet, take some Claritin to stop the sneezing!

firefly319 7

Wednesday 22 May 2013 15:33

Sit with the inside of a banana peel on your hemorrhoids. It's sounds strange but it makes them settle down and usually stops them hurting completely. *shrug*. This is my shot and random stuff that works in weird ways... Hope you feel better OP.