By whoops - 02/09/2016 14:49 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Spicy
Today, I accidentally sent my boss an explicit text message. She replied saying, "Very detailed, if only you put that much effort into your work". FML
I agree, your life sucks 12 619
You deserved it 6 149
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Top comments

Tripartita 44

I'm wondering how detailed you actually were. I mean, I'm nothing special, but I tend to include the standard, "I'll turn you π radians clockwise perpendicular to my **** before oscillating with a frequency of 144 thrusts per minute, attenuating at a rate of negative 4.8 thrusts per second near climax. Baby."

286 8

Comments

ThunderLightTSV 31

Hey you got a lesson out of it. Work, and then more work. By that I mean work hard, and then after that you can *work* hard.

25 4
SpyroMello 29

Maybe you should work just as hard at work as you do in the bedroom.

19 0
delichick 27

YDI for not double checking who you were texting

29 2
Tripartita 44

I'm wondering how detailed you actually were. I mean, I'm nothing special, but I tend to include the standard, "I'll turn you π radians clockwise perpendicular to my **** before oscillating with a frequency of 144 thrusts per minute, attenuating at a rate of negative 4.8 thrusts per second near climax. Baby."

286 8
crudeandrudeguy 29

I wish I was smart enough to tell if this could be done or not...

30 7
Tripartita 44

It's not too far off from being accurate. • If one was erect and somebody was laying in front of them, you'd probably want them to rotate around an axis /parallel/ to the **** instead of perpendicular. • Pi radians is equal to 180°, so they'd just be laying on their stomach. • 144 thrusts per minute is a little more than a couple thrusts per second. • Thrusting 4.8 less times per second means you'll have decelerated to a stop around thirty seconds (4.8*30=144) near climaxing.

66 1
delichick 27

Dude the fact that you went into that much detail upgraded you to my favourite person :)

33 2
Tripartita 44

There was a FML a little while ago (it's currently the second result if you search "envelope") on which I posted a comment. You told me then I was your favourite person, so how could you "upgrade" me now? Did you even remember me?! I… I thought what we had was special…

64 1
delichick 27

Oops, when you get to be my age, you start getting memory loss. Ill correct myself and state you are still my favourite person

24 2
Jaelkus 28

It is ok. You can be my favorite person. I won't forget you.

8 8
preston55 7

I don't think thrusting over 2 times a second is possible but I'm no expert.

4 4
anonymuse_fml 31

Oh, baby. Talk geometry and frequency to me.

30 1
rivimatt 20

Holy ****, 2.4 thrusts per second would be mechanical

0 0
Teyros 24

Better start working harder OP! And double checking who you are texting..

10 0
chosha_fml 26

Great reply from your boss, and it sounds like YDI.

8 0