Miscellaneous: Today, I accidentally texted the girl I like, "Oh god, I just...

By Boneo and Juliet - 16/07/2015 19:22 - United States - Amherst

Today, I accidentally texted the girl I like, "Oh god, I just choked on a boner." I meant bone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 840

You deserved it 5 012

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Same thing different taste

Nice try

By Proof-Reader - 15/12/2009 08:32 - United States

Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 415

You deserved it 31 987

By in big trouble - 23/08/2014 12:28 - Australia - Sydney

Today, I had an argument with my boss and tried to text a friend about it. I accidentally texted my boss instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 392

You deserved it 25 975

By kingmetal42 - 09/02/2010 19:10 - France

Today, I texted my girlfriend that I'm going to 'lick my professor's ass' instead of 'kick' due to auto-correction on my phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 978

You deserved it 27 874

By Anonymous - 11/03/2017 12:00

Today, after a brief FaceTime session, I accidentally texted my father what was meant for my boyfriend. I had to downplay it, but it still made me want to crawl 50 ft below the earth and stay there a few days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 607

You deserved it 1 326

I'm a weirdoooooo

By Anonymous - 18/07/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I sent a text to the girl I like, asking if she wanted to "hang out." Autocorrect changed it to "hand out," and she responded by asking what I was handing out. I panicked and replied, "My love." Now she thinks I'm a weirdo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 500

By tinypenis - 04/06/2013 12:15 - United States - Jamaica

Today, while sexting my girlfriend, I accidently sent a picture to her father instead of her. He sent back a link to a penis enlargement company's website. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 821

You deserved it 71 864

Freudian slip

By Anonymous - 24/02/2023 14:00

Today, I accidentally sent a text message meant for my best friend to my boss. The text was about how much I hated my job and my boss's constant micromanagement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 1 052

By randomgirl - 07/01/2012 14:12 - United Kingdom

Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe". FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 109

You deserved it 14 823

Just a prank, again

By momaaa1342 - 21/10/2013 03:51 - United States - Elmwood

Today, I got a call from my daughter’s school today. She had been telling the teacher, "I have a huge boner." Apparently, some of the kids at school told her it meant 'headache' and she's been saying it all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 721

You deserved it 3 605

By drpepperking10 - 02/07/2016 23:27 - United States

Today, I was kissing my crush for the first time and her tooth fell out into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 357

You deserved it 3 264

BlackFames 16

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Stick with your story, man. That's what I always do.

hotheadslav 17

Friday 17 July 2015 0:35

Just text her back and say you meant bone. I'm sure she'll understand it was a mistake and maybe you guys can laugh about it!

Comments

MJD14 13

Saturday 18 July 2015 0:17

Haha, texting/words are "hard" =P

kpetrovski 24

Saturday 18 July 2015 2:17

Pfft... We know what you actually meant. You're not fooling anyone :p

cowsgowoof 9

Saturday 18 July 2015 7:49

sorry but this is hilarious! so sorry for what happened to you

nobodyer 16

Saturday 18 July 2015 18:45

why would you send her that you choked on a bone anyway?

venterd 13

Sunday 19 July 2015 0:05

At least you tried

nightfall8705 33

Sunday 19 July 2015 2:24

Damn You Auto Correct is a popular website for a reason. Social awkwardness at its finest!

NotFrench_AtAll 11

Sunday 19 July 2015 3:12

Jeez You gotta love auto correct. But seriously you gotta re-read your texts from time to time, there is no excuse unless you aren't sober.

LuckyLila 4

Tuesday 21 July 2015 8:20

auto correct is EVIL! ?

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I got back the essay I wrote about how my country's education system is fucked. At one point, I made a spelling mistake. My teacher wrote a note about it, basically calling me illiterate, and telling me to pay attention in school instead of whining about it. She misspelled "school". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 025

You deserved it 4 661

Today, my boyfriend took me home to have dinner with his parents. I couldn’t eat a single bite after watching his mom let her three dogs taste all the food off her hands, while she also licked her own fingers while cooking. Later on, he dumped me for being rude and “too high maintenance." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 256

You deserved it 139

The Top

Today, I found out that my roommate of 4 years is sleeping with my ex of 7 years. Yesterday, she showed up to court as a witness for him and lied on the stand to try to get the protection order dropped. She's on the lease, so I have to live with this snake for 2 more months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 410

You deserved it 303

Today, I asked my friend what form of birth control she used the first time she had sex. She stared at me like I was from another planet and said, "You can't get pregnant the first time..." This moron is my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 859

You deserved it 7 867

Today, after my stepdaughter warned me that she’d get rid of me, she's finally successfully driven such a large wedge between me and my wife that we haven’t spoken in a month, and today she asked me for a divorce. Well played, stepdaughter, well played. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 782

You deserved it 338

Today, I put up lost dog signs and even posted a Facebook post regarding my lost dog. I keep getting “Restricted” calls taunting me, saying they found my dog and are not giving her back. I’m unable to trace the calls and this is making me more upset and frustrated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 858

You deserved it 107

Today, after a risking my life on the way to Europe and saving every penny I made as an illegal worker to send home, I found out that my brother used the money to open a small business, get pretty successful, and is going to marry my all-time love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 297

Today, my best friend of 18 years decided to end our friendship in order to continue sleeping with her brother-in-law, who is also my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 521

You deserved it 104