By Anonymous - 01/01/2011 06:08 - United States

Today, I am pregnant, sober, designated driver, and puke cleaner. Yay for the New Year! FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 748
You deserved it 7 409
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

CaptainPat 0

well if your pregnant you shouldn't be drinkin anyway. and if your the sober one it only makes sense to be the DD. the only FMLish part is the opuke cleaner.

36 2
perdix 29

Well, the pregnant -> sober -> designated driver, but you should be clever enough to convince your baby daddy that you can't be the puke cleaner. Tell him he has to clean up his own puke or HIS CHILD WILL DIE! Give him some jibber-jabber about toxoplasmosis -- he'll be too drunk to look at Wikipedia.

26 4

Comments

jasonsexcema 3

see i just wouldn't have a baby in the first place. problem solved

1 4
yourmurderscenex 13

maybe you should learn to keep your legs shut and you wouldnt be having this problem. plus you didn't have to go. but really, what'd you expect... everyone to be sober with you??

2 3
Writingislife16 1

OP being pregnant does not make her a ****. She could very well be married and ready to have children. That is after all what most people do once they are married. A durrr.

4 2
TrimKibbles 12

deal with it. it's one day. shit happens.

3 1
jimbawa 1

whats with all the negative feelings for the OP? Its just the culmination of a lot of unfortunate / stressful things. Sorry you had such an unpleasant new years OP, I figured someone should say it.

6 1
partychix246 0

well at least you can now tell all the people u drove to watch ur kid cuz u cleaned up their puke

3 1
hatster 4

Poor little ***** isnt allowed to kill her fetus on New Years Eve. Poo ******* Whoo.

1 0