Miscellaneous: Today, I asked my mom if I could join my friends in getting lessons...

By anonymous - 01/06/2009 07:05 - Korea Republic of

Today, I asked my mom if I could join my friends in getting lessons in self defense. My mom told me that I didn't need them because my face was a better weapon to repel anyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 219

You deserved it 5 299

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Same thing different taste

By Username - 28/09/2010 16:16 - France

Today, my mum suggested that I should take self-defense lessons just in case I ever get attacked. Jokingly, I said, "As long as I walk under street lamps, no one is going to touch me." She replied, "Well, you never know, they might mistake you for someone good looking." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 379

You deserved it 4 864

Not so Karate Kid

By Matthew - 09/03/2020 19:00 - United States - Juneau

Today, my mom told me to do karate with her, and so I said no. Now my mom won't let me do anything until I go do karate with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 346

You deserved it 346

'Murica

By Maryann - 08/02/2018 01:30

Today, I told my dad I started taking jiu-jitsu lessons. He responded by laughing and saying, "Martial arts are for pussies, you should just get a gun." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 337

You deserved it 651

By Anonymous - 29/09/2015 22:50 - United States - Howell

Today, my mom was watching me during my Taekwondo lessons. She was yelling at me to focus on my own work and to quit hanging out with the little kids. I'm the instructor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 873

You deserved it 1 812

By mommy_issues - 29/08/2009 16:46 - United States

Today, I was curious as to whether or not my mom was off of her medication. When I asked her, she pulled a knife on me. Looks like I got my answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 174

You deserved it 4 528

By inpain - 17/03/2016 04:56 - United States - San Francisco

Today, in my self-defense class, we did an attack simulation. As I began to hit my attacker, my fist hit the top of his helmet, dislocating my shoulder. I then spent the next hour in the ER sobbing until it was popped back in. I need to learn to defend myself against myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 893

You deserved it 2 408

By Anonymous - 24/09/2011 04:40 - United States

Today, I received a serious concussion and several stitches to the back of my head. The attacker? My mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 573

You deserved it 2 947

Karate Kid

By Anonymous - 29/10/2021 08:00

Today, I took out a thief using my martial arts training. Everyone thanked me, even the police. My mom spent the rest of the day moaning that if I’d minded my own business, the thief would've been gone in two minutes, but thanks to me we had to waste an hour of her day off talking to the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 362

You deserved it 106

By -_- - 05/07/2013 21:59 - United States - Munith

Today, at a family dinner, my mother-in-law talked me into showing off some moves that I've learned in martial arts. I gently did a restraining hold on her. She screamed that I was trying to break her wrists, and kept the wounded act up all night, smirking as everyone gave me death glares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 583

You deserved it 5 226

By Anonymous - 31/12/2014 20:29 - United States

Today, my mom tried to give me a pep talk to boost my self confidence. Somehow, it ended up turning into a conversation about how much of a loser I am and how I have no friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 087

You deserved it 2 894

fortytwo 0

Monday 1 June 2009 15:58

Inform her that you got all your looks from her.

Dogmaw 0

Monday 1 June 2009 15:57

Start leaving brochures for the worst nursing homes in town laying around the house.

Comments

BaldOuting 0

Monday 1 June 2009 19:23

i bet it's cus mom is a cheap ass and figures she can just project onto your low self-esteem.

420bliss 0

Monday 1 June 2009 19:24

well, if you're fighting and you want to use that to your advantage, wear a mask at first so when you take it off it's like a surprise attack of ugly

hahayou12345 0

Monday 1 June 2009 19:36

Wow, that's just totally...amazing. I mean, what sort of mom is that?

bosco_kk 0

Monday 1 June 2009 19:36

I thought ugly people were the one who got teased and what not. So yeah, if you are "that ugly" better get some lessons. And your mom is an ass.

bosco_kk 0

Monday 1 June 2009 19:42

At least your mom is realistic, and honest. I know moms who are always flattering their children saying OMG YOU ARE LIKE THE BEST LOOKING KID IN THE WORLD, when those kids look like a modern version of Frankenstein and Fiona. One thing is confidence..and another one being delusional. FYL anyway lol.

Hellcrapdamn 0

Monday 1 June 2009 20:12

Your mom's funny.

sarcasticbitch 7

Monday 1 June 2009 20:13

OMG xD hahahaha... U should consider plastic surgery ;]

altna 4

Monday 1 June 2009 20:24

ahaha #3 #9; omfg are you serious, ofc not all of them know kung fu. >:0 They know taekwondo. ;D "From a luxury limited to the wealthy a decade ago, according to ARA, plastic surgery has become so common that an estimated 30 percent of Korean women aged 20 to 50, or some 2.4 million women, had surgical or nonsurgical cosmetic procedures last year, with many having more than one procedure." See www for source.

robodoll 0

Monday 1 June 2009 20:37

Even though your mom doesn't have to tell you that you look like a supermodel, I don't think it was very nice of her to say something like that. I wouldn't say that was a great example of parenting, and I can't even fathom what kind of lesson you could learn from a comment like that.