Intimacy: Today, I came home about two hours early from a friend's party....

By emkatch - 21/07/2009 19:47 - Canada

Today, I came home about two hours early from a friend's party. After I walked in and upstairs, I quickly and quietly left and went back to the party. I guess my parents decided to have a little party as well. It's called a threesome with my neighbor. They still don't know that I know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 835

You deserved it 4 373

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Same thing different taste

By Sofi - 21/08/2018 06:00

Today, I canceled going to a party with my sisters because I had a secret plan to have a threesome. They left for the party, but soon returned thinking it would be no fun without me. By then we were already making a lot of indecent noise. They heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 229

You deserved it 2 996

Self report

By banana12321 - 02/04/2015 04:40 - United States - Fresno

Today, I thought I had gotten away with throwing a party while my folks were gone the night before. They came home and I was as sweet as possible. I could tell they were not buying it, but I thought I was in the clear. Later, they told me I had drunk-dialled them and spilled the beans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 206

You deserved it 30 482

Sorry, what?

By butch - 13/11/2009 07:04 - United States

Today, my upstairs neighbor congratulated me on keeping him up 'til dawn with my girlfriend and the chick in the apartment next to us. He doesn't know how I got them to agree to a threesome. Since I was at my folks all weekend, neither do I. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 137

You deserved it 2 408

Work harder

By zep - 07/06/2009 11:41 - United States

Today, I was hard at work cleaning up from a party I had while my parents were out for the night. Not a bottle of beer or a red cup was left for them to find. However, my parents did find two of my friends in their bedroom, still passed out and naked from beer and sex last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 357

You deserved it 79 665

Self report

By Anonymous - 25/05/2009 14:55 - United States

Today, I snuck out of my house in the middle of the night. I ran into my dad carrying wine into another house. I didn't assume he was cheating until he saw me and said, "I won't tell if you don't tell, please don't tell your mother." FML

I agree, your life sucks 87 044

You deserved it 5 529

Classic lineup

By Phoellie - 28/08/2009 11:43 - United Kingdom

Today, as I arrived at my house after a two week holiday, I opened the door and heard footsteps upstairs. I went up and found my boyfriend naked in bed. We had great sex. Afterwards I found my best friend naked in the wardrobe. Turns out they'd also had great sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 321

You deserved it 5 232

By slondons - 18/01/2011 20:53 - United Kingdom

Today, my friends were acting strange around me. This afternoon, I got a text asking me to meet them out for a couple of drinks. Because of all the strange acting, I decided to tell them I'd go and then not go. I just found out they had been planning me a surprise party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 629

You deserved it 52 354

Mortified

By killmenow - 21/02/2011 01:19 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 000

You deserved it 8 945

Confinement's gonna be fun

By Anonymous - 16/03/2020 23:01

Today, I left the house to get groceries. My parents asked me where I was going and how long I would be gone for. Thinking they were just being inquisitive parents, I ignored them. I got home 20 minutes later to them having sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 822

You deserved it 2 398

By Werner - 02/03/2009 21:04 - United States

Today, I came home after a party to my parents, who confronted me. They said that my phone had made a pocket call to them and they heard a good half hour of people talking about drugs and alcohol. I confessed at that point. I checked my phone after. I hadn't called them in 3 days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 657

You deserved it 67 499

kirbyfan23 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 0:43

Shoulda stayed at the party. LOL FYL, man. kinky, though.

videogamejunkie 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 0:48

Those were YOUR parents?

Comments

kirbyfan23 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 0:43

Shoulda stayed at the party. LOL FYL, man. kinky, though.

animaniatico 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 2:43

i think its a woman fom the fml?

hecuva 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 2:58

or joined in on this party ;)

gregthestrange 3

Wednesday 22 July 2009 4:10

pics or it didn't happen

meme3 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 4:23

Giggity giggity goo.

kg1990 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 20:18

agreed

hama806 19

Monday 13 August 2012 6:55

Some things can not be unseen. Poor OP.

hama806 19

Monday 13 August 2012 6:57

Just gross!

ChaCerCam 14

Wednesday 6 August 2014 7:27

#108 I saw my 84 year old grandma naked, I no longer remember it.

bluedoll 1

Wednesday 22 July 2009 0:44

Oh....Next time maybe you should yell as you come up the stairs? I always call my parents to let them know I;m coming home...just so everyone has clothes on....

splitsides 4

Wednesday 22 July 2009 6:37

i think you missed the part where she was SNEAKING back in...

zargon 1

Wednesday 22 July 2009 6:45

Yeah, I think everyone missed that part, since it wasn't in the FML. In fact, the FML suggests that the parents knew she was out. Where did you get this "sneaking" from?

divineinstrument 2

Wednesday 22 July 2009 9:14

Why do people insist on making up stuff and acting like it's written or even implied in the FML?

thumb_r0ck3r 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 0:47

You should have asked to join 'em (;

bgukusa00 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 9:46

some people have seriously sick parents

bryan8497 1

Monday 19 September 2011 3:27

8======D

sofaqueen_ 14

Tuesday 8 July 2014 6:40

#3 you're also sick for thinking that joining them would be a great idea. FYL op

videogamejunkie 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 0:48

Those were YOUR parents?

zed_eh 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 1:57

Ydi cuz you said "all of a sudden I heard a sigh" "all of a sudden" implies that there was something unexpected and eventful. That sentence just doesn't flow good

bexox 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 2:26

*doesn't flow well. What are you talking about, btw?

caticaticati 3

Wednesday 22 July 2009 2:26

#26 ...What the hell are you talking about?

divineinstrument 2

Wednesday 22 July 2009 9:23

#26- Did you by any chance post this on the wrong FML?

zed_eh 0

Friday 24 July 2009 1:05

Shit wrong fml response. Dam I hate it when that happens.. Ya that was the joke

blabbermouth26 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 0:50

Ew that sucks

robchfra 5

Thursday 21 June 2012 23:13

Yea cause parents stop having sex immediately after the conception of the OP. Get real, parents **** and you should be glad they do.

barakados 11

Wednesday 16 April 2014 17:29

But A threesome? With the neighbor?

Casualt1234 0

Wednesday 22 July 2009 0:51

Today, I found out that even though my parents have been married for 21 years, our "family friend," who routinely accompanies us on family vacations, completes their threesome. Everyone in town has know for years, except for me and my older brother. FML haha oh threesomes are the all rage lately..