Miscellaneous: Today, I complimented a girl on her stockings pattern. Turns...

By jordeshting - 22/06/2011 15:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I complimented a girl on her stockings pattern. Turns out she wasn't wearing stockings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 708

You deserved it 8 614

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Same thing different taste

By AndieApocalypse - 03/06/2011 04:21 - United States

Today, I was complimented on my hat by two different people. I wasn't wearing a hat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 001

You deserved it 6 374

Being nice is so 1968

By Anonymous - 23/06/2017 01:00 - Saudi Arabia

Today, I decided to do something nice and compliment a stranger. I told a girl that I liked her skirt and that it looked good on her. She just rolled her eyes at me and said, "I'm not gay". FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 325

You deserved it 549

By Anonymous - 01/02/2011 02:39 - United States

Today, I politely complimented a stranger's excellent posture. She responded by saying "I have a metal rod in my back." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 585

You deserved it 7 206

By That Guy - 01/11/2014 12:58 - United States - Tampa

Today, I realized why the lady I had complimented the night before on Halloween about her amazing one-armed costume, looked so hurt. She is literally missing an arm. I'm an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 617

You deserved it 14 242

You tried

By Anonymous - 22/01/2021 00:01 - Australia

Today, my colleague was wearing a beautiful dress. I decided that I had to go over and compliment her. As I walked over, my coffee cup flew out of my hand and onto said dress. She had to go home and change, and my boss had to cover for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 973

You deserved it 454

Kinda sus, dude

By Anonymous - 12/10/2021 11:00

Today, I found ladies knee-high socks that weren't mine. I don't even own a pair of knee-high socks. After bickering back and forth with my boyfriend, he said, "Actually now that you mention it, I thought they were yours and I put them there." FML

I agree, your life sucks 816

You deserved it 91

By Rose - 15/06/2012 05:54 - United States - Tenino

Today, I was at the mall with my friend. A lady came up to us and told my friend that she could be a model. Then the lady looked at me and said, "Oh... Nice shoes." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 581

You deserved it 2 668

By anonymous - 11/06/2015 14:37 - Canada - Calgary

Today, my boyfriend and I were downtown when he pointed to a girl and said he wished I dressed more like she did. She was obviously a hooker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 901

You deserved it 2 652

By noname - 04/01/2009 05:39 - France

Today, I went shopping with a friend. She went to try some clothes on and came out to ask for my opinion. "Hell no! That shirt is awful!". She wanted to show me the pants. The shirt was hers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 026

You deserved it 25 347

Locks are useful

By mjayne17 - 21/03/2009 19:04 - Canada

Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house. One thing led to another and we were just getting to the good parts when his mom walked in. After a long, awkward pause, she said, "I like your socks" and walked out. She's a teacher at my high school. I have to see her every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 027

You deserved it 22 282

iAmScrubs 19

Wednesday 22 June 2011 19:11

Your stockings pattern is quite intriguing young lassie.

MrSassypants 33

Wednesday 22 June 2011 19:11

Sunburn or camouflage?

Comments

jpretz 1

Thursday 23 June 2011 5:42

how did this get on FML?

sblhaine 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 5:44

wow...hmmm. I'm wondering how to take this

blastedcamera 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 7:05

I sense a skin condition.

Mr_Wolfberg 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 8:25

Don't Perve over girls legs, it would come across creepy any way you put that YDI

simsimma88 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 21:42

who compliments someone's stockings?

goin4Ayog 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 21:53

lol! ahhh the look of "I lost my razor and havent gotten around to buying a new one yet"

jbswifeyforlifey 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 22:12

what was the pattern??

sarah1741 3

Thursday 23 June 2011 23:59

then what the hell where they, pen drawing???

loverslove123 0

Friday 24 June 2011 7:29

that was me !

LOLLOSERRR 0

Friday 24 June 2011 11:31

omg lmffaaooo

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him "Meow" over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin, and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 634

You deserved it 68 712

Today, I spent an entire hour talking to someone at a party. I was feeling a real connection, only to find out halfway through the conversation that she wasn’t actually a guest, she was the caterer who just happened to be really nice. FML

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You deserved it 187

The Top

Today, my daughter had a vocabulary assignment. She had to find five new words in books and movies. She was watching Shrek, so her first word was "thong". FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 584

You deserved it 2 123

Today, I got married. My husband and I had been waiting until marriage to have sex, and when the time came, we started to undress. As I took my bra off, his eyes glazed over, and he fainted. An hour later, all he could say was, "I don't think we're meant to be together." FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 419

You deserved it 9 613

Today, I woke up and decided that I no longer give a fuck what I look like. Today is also the day a very attractive exchange student joined my private band lessons. FML

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You deserved it 12 884

Today, I used the upstairs bathroom rather than the downstairs one, which was in close earshot of my parents. When I came out, my mom angrily asked why I used that bathroom. I explained to her that I have shy bladder, and she said, "That’s not a real thing. I can go even with someone watching." FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 133

Today, really desperate to get a job, I filled out an application for a dishwashing job. My application got tossed out, because I'm not an economics major like the other guy applying for the same job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 942

You deserved it 2 624

Today, the best friend I grew up with since primary school, who helped me be a single mom to my son, helping with bottle feeds, nappy changing and so on, has been shagging him since he turned 20. They’re getting married next year, despite the 24-year age gap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 276

You deserved it 127