Health: Today, I discovered after four hours of vomiting that it is very...

By Anonymous - 04/01/2011 07:12 - United Kingdom

Today, I discovered after four hours of vomiting that it is very much possible to vomit so hard you can't help but shit in your trousers. My boyfriend is currently staying over, too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 289

You deserved it 2 975

New Year, New Blunders
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Same thing different taste

By Jenn - 24/09/2017 10:00 - United States - Fort Wayne

Today, I had my first astounding orgasm during which I simultaneously shit myself and vomited. So thankful my new partner was present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 321

You deserved it 645

By fionna_fiamma - 12/12/2015 13:33 - Slovenia - Maribor

Today, my boyfriend came to my house for the first time. Today was also the day my body decided to throw up violently for four hours while he awkwardly sat beside me, waiting for his ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 496

You deserved it 1 641

By Anonymouse - 07/11/2015 02:03

Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 919

You deserved it 2 172

By sadddddd - 11/09/2011 01:54 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 883

You deserved it 3 270

By Anonymous - 09/11/2010 07:08 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend got so drunk that he was sick in the taxi, sick on me, then sick on himself when he was sitting on the toilet. What's more, I can't get into bed because he's been sick all over my half of the bed. So I'm sleeping on the sofa tonight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 558

You deserved it 5 369

Hot lava from both ends

By SickBoi - 30/03/2021 14:01 - United States - Cambridge

Today, I was suffering from food poisoning and had constant diarrhea, along with feeling nauseous. I couldn't hold my vomit in and rushed to the toilet, but due to the pressure, I pooped while still in pajamas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 979

You deserved it 96

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 22:08 - United States - Marsing

Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 472

You deserved it 12 274

Bro moment

By Anonymous - 11/11/2021 11:00

Today, I had a stomach bug and had to run to the restroom because I messed my pants. My boyfriend's words of comfort? "Don't worry, bro. I've crapped my pants at least twice since we've been together." FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 170

Gross out competition

By shattysituation - 31/12/2012 22:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 438

You deserved it 4 059

Put the booze down

By Anonymous - 13/08/2020 14:01

Today, I shat myself in front of my girlfriend's family, after drinking too much the previous night and waking up with major stomach problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 561

You deserved it 2 085

nicknesser 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 12:09

Hey maybe he's into that shit.

Wuhuh 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 12:14

At least he can take shit from you.

Comments

indiecolor 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 13:29

that happened to me it sucked.

GavinRoskamp 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 13:29

YDI for calling them trousers. Get out of the 1700's already.

Rocksygen 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 13:46

She's from the UK and they call them trousers there. Get out of that ignorance field.

devileyekill 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 15:28

I visited the UK a while back and it was like going back 10 years. Either they are behind America in fasion or they were going through some retro phase. Either way it was fun.

Bagel09 11

Tuesday 4 January 2011 18:51

maybe America went back in time.

MzKylz 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 14:25

just go have a shower and chuck your pants in the bin on the way lol.

RyNo24 4

Tuesday 4 January 2011 14:55

girls don't poop...

BoCo_fml 9

Tuesday 4 January 2011 15:19

Be happy that this didn't happen at his place. Get in the shower, clean up and stop whining. If you feel too awful for company just send him home. I don't see what the problem is. Unless he doesn't live that close to you and you don't see eachother often, then that's just shitty indeed!

relyo 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 15:22

Don't worry. He won't be your boyfriend for much longer.

mytralala_fml 7

Tuesday 4 January 2011 15:37

that happened to me. minus the bf. cause im forever alone.

ladybuuggy 0

Tuesday 4 January 2011 17:23

At least you have someone to take care of you! Just don't puke on him and I'm sure he'll help out

shaniqualee 2

Tuesday 4 January 2011 18:52

If I were you're boyfriend, I would take one look at you and your shitty pants and say, "Ok so...let's do anal right now" and I would pound you in the butt, but it would help you vomit more.

SayPeanuts 29

Tuesday 2 August 2011 16:04

You failed at being funny.

sallen0046 4

Wednesday 5 January 2011 1:21

You could have easily asked your boyfriend to leave so that you could be sick in peace. Men understand the need to be sick alone. It's your home - throw your clothes in the washer and get in the shower. It's unpleasant, but happens to nearly everyone at some point. You just clean yourself up and get on with things.