By seizure_girl - 15/08/2013 13:32 - United States - Pierre

Today, I discovered I have epilepsy. 10 years ago, I told my mother about my frequent fits of vertigo, deja vu, nausea, flashes of memory and strange sounds, smells, and images, coupled with an other-worldly feeling. I thought they were holy visions. So did she. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 476
You deserved it 20 789

seizure_girl tells us more.

Hi there. OP here. Temporal lobe epilepsy involves some pretty freakish seizures that are actually interpreted as religious visions by many. They're a very intense spiritual experience. I was fifteen years old, and spent the next three years as a devout Christian, my own logic at war with my profound sense of purpose. Then I turned 18 and discovered marijuana. Lo and behold, the "visions" disappeared, and I was an atheist again. I made the connection between the drug and the cessation of my fits when I stopped taking it and they came back. Epilepsy never occurred to me until recently, the first time I collapsed into a grand mal seizure in public. I picked myself up off the ground in confusion to meet a lot of stares, and a woman nearby informed me I'd had a seizure. The "aura" that I'd gotten just before blacking out and convulsing was the same as the onset of my previous "visions", the first real clue I'd ever gotten. And yes, my mother is an idiot. When I said that I'd had a seizure while she'd been across the fairgrounds, she accused me of being drunk and said she was disappointed in me for ruining our fun evening at the carnival.

Top comments

Yeah, I think the "holy visions" are as the parents who thought their child was possessed when he was actually suffering from seizures.

Comments

meherm 11

As a religious person even I was in shock that you thought it was "holy visions". The first thing you should've done when you experienced all those symptoms was go straight to the doctors. Especially since epilepsy is a serious matter! Seriously though "HOLY VISIONS"?! Really?! That was the first thing that came to mind!! I can't believe it -_-

Naturelover89 2

I think I understand what you mean by "holy visions," and it seems that almost everyone else who has commented doesn't and so mocks the idea. They don't know what you mean, and neither do most doctors. I'm not at all denying that you have epilepsy and that or saying that you shouldn't treat it. Sometimes, in times of crisis or turmoil, people have what are often called "spiritual experiences." There is nothing wrong with them, they are not personal, and they are not the same as religious institutions or beliefs. (Though, people sometimes experience them in meditation or prayer.) You don't need to treat them as hallucinations or as anything wrong. What they do is reassure you that everything is okay at the deepest level no matter what happens. Peace be with you.

pazuzus_intern 10

Okay great, except this was epilepsy, and one of several illnesses that can cause hallucinations. I'm not trying to knock your faith but if someone experiences "holy visions" on a regular basis, they should see a doctor, not wait for it to get worse because they think they are some kind of holy prophet.

Naturelover89 2

I did NOT say that she didn't have something serious that needs medical attention. I believe she had A LOT of hallucinations and other serious symptoms and that it's good that she saw a doctor. However, I don't believe that ALL of what she experienced was hallucinations, etc.. Hallucinations have a very different quality from "spiritual experiences," and the latter can be experienced in a wide variety of scenarios (in health or in illness). It seems that you don't understand their nature because you've never had them. They are human experiences that anyone can have given the circumstances; they don't make anyone special or produce psychological highs like a drug. They don't get in the way of life, but enhance one's ability to live it to the fullest. The profound feelings/sense of holiness are not exclusive or directed at anyone (though they're more likely to be felt by those with open minds and hearts and less ego/reactive tendencies). I'm someone who has come to see all of life as sacred and special.

graceinsheepwear 33

You apparently didn't bring the so-called visions to the attention of your minister, as I am certain they would have brought some objective clarity to the situation and sent you to a doctor.

pazuzus_intern 10

Depending on the community, you wouldn't believe how some sects will delude themselves into thinking that anything is a sign of divine intervention. I saw on episode on law and order where a young epileptic boy was killed because his minister believed "exorcizing the demon" would be more effective than medical treatment.

RedPillSucks 31
pazuzus_intern 10

I'm aware of that but that does not by any means indicate that is has never happened, ever. I was just using that as an example.

No, there is some truth to this ''exorcise the epileptic'' bullshit - but it's mostly in the past, people are now slightly more educated about epilepsy. But generally those fictional crime-solving series are based on real happenings.

raindropzproduct 3

it would've better if she thought you were psychic, at least she could've gotten you checked out 10 year ago

Those sound like some pretty painful holy visions OP :/

She's from South Dakota where there's a high Indian population to this day. Culturally, holy visions are common and still accepted buy many people. OP just wasn't lucky enough to get a real one

Holy crap! you've been suffering epilepsy for 10 year, I can't imagine how bad it was! sorry for you OP, hope you are ok now! I don't mean to be disrespectful bur "holy vision" made me laugh so bad! fyl!

pazuzus_intern 10

How on earth is OP spreading the word that religious people are crazy? By having a serious illness he or she can't do anything about? That was very hateful and insulting of you. If your going to get uppity on the subject how about this particular community for filling OPs head with lies about such a serious condition?!

Being superstitious can have negative side effects. In this case, having undiagnosed epilepsy for a decade.

myeviltwin 20

You know how to tell if you are having holy visions? Hold this poisonous snake till it bites you and if you live (without medical attention) god is protecting you and they were indeed holy visions. Great way to weed the stupid out of the gene pool.