Kids: Today, I discovered that my son has an allergy to cats. My partner...

By Anonymous - 20/10/2010 07:11 - New Zealand

Today, I discovered that my son has an allergy to cats. My partner of two years, not wanting to fight, suggested a compromise: that my son and the cat take turns sleeping outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 714

You deserved it 5 890

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Same thing different taste

Don't make me choose

By Ames - 23/05/2009 16:07 - United States

Today, after being diagnosed with cat allergies, I explained to my cat-loving boyfriend that the doctor strongly recommended not allowing the cat in the bedroom. At 1:30 a.m. my boyfriend got out of the bed to go sleep in the spare room because, "the cat is sad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 674

You deserved it 9 053

By BambooLove - 15/07/2010 06:53 - United States

Today, my boyfriend woke up wheezing terribly, aching, and sneezing. He's allergic to cats. I have 2 and they are my babies. He gave me an ultimatum, him or the cats. I haven't figured out how I'm going to tell him that I choose the cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 080

You deserved it 65 917

By fmlsrsly - 25/03/2009 16:43 - United States

Today, I went to the doctor to find out why I've been feeling so sick the past several weeks. Turns out, I'm severely allergic to the cat of my girlfriend of two years. I told her "It's me or the cat." She chose the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 445

You deserved it 30 279

By Cat lover - 23/12/2017 01:30

Today, after 25 years living with my dad, who is highly allergic to cats, I was finally able to adopt two kittens to live in my new place, just like I have always wanted. Guess who else is highly allergic to cats? Me, it seems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 502

You deserved it 996

Summer vibes

By milksquad - 17/07/2017 14:11

Today, my roommates adopted two kittens without consulting me. We're not allowed to have pets in our apartment and I'm severely allergic to cats. Oh well, it's not like I needed to be able to breathe this summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 306

You deserved it 345

By blehhx - 09/04/2011 05:32 - United States

Today, I found out my cat is allergic to ME. No kidding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 008

You deserved it 4 387

By Lola - 23/07/2012 04:31

Today, my boyfriend bought us three kittens. Today, I also discovered that I am allergic to cats. My boyfriend broke up with me because he wanted the cats more than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 791

You deserved it 4 349

Cats rule, boys drool

By achoooo - 07/11/2009 05:34 - United States

Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 443

You deserved it 3 015

By anonymous - 06/06/2016 16:51 - United States - Phoenix

Today, like every other day for the past two weeks, the strange cat that has adopted me inexplicably made its way into my house and curled up next to my head while I slept. I'm horribly allergic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 358

You deserved it 1 590

Itchy and scratchy

By Anonymous - 31/08/2022 12:00 - Australia

Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was there, I started to get really itchy. Turns out they have 5 cats. Guess what I'm allergic to? FML

I agree, your life sucks 959

You deserved it 111

sweet_candy_ 17

Wednesday 20 October 2010 16:07

I think someone needs a partner with a brain.

iloveboyswittats 10

Wednesday 20 October 2010 16:12

It was probably a joke. I can't see anyone saying that seriously.

Comments

Syncopations 3

Wednesday 11 March 2015 0:44

What kind of screwed up person would make this sort of decision? The cat shouldn't have to sleep outside.

Mixed_steel 23

Thursday 26 March 2015 21:48

You might be a redneck if...

VinylScratch 17

Wednesday 29 April 2015 5:35

Haha! King of the Hill!

Gilli2001 9

Sunday 29 November 2015 17:54

Give the damn cat away with out him knowing and tell him it ran away

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I lost yet another girlfriend because my ex tells every girl I go out with that I cheated on her. She DMs them screenshots of what I did. I know I’m no saint, but all that was 6 months ago, and it was an accident. I can’t change the past, but I can be sorry for what I did. I just can’t win in this situation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 992

Today, I rushed home because my wife called to let me know she was feeling horny for the first time after getting over a bad flu. I walked in the door and surprise surprise, her sister had called round, wanting sympathy after her latest fuckbuddy dumped her. Romantic mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 250

You deserved it 207

The Top

Today, my date threw me out because I wouldn’t hit her in the face to really get her excited. I offered to spank her butt if she really wanted to be hit, but she wanted me to beat her until she had bruises and could taste blood. The girl had issues, so I was happy to be thrown out to be honest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 878

You deserved it 233

Today, at work at a farm, we got a new calf. It looked like it had to poop, but was having difficulty. About four hours later it still hadn't pooped. Turns out it was born without an actual butthole. It was there, just sealed up by skin. I literally had to cut this poor calf a new butthole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 88 522

You deserved it 4 671

Today, I was working when an older lady came up to buy a coffee. Her son cried for a cup of whipped cream to snack on. She shook her head, silently telling me to say no. I said we were out. The mother took her drink and said, "I'm sorry honey, but the mean man said you couldn't have any." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 959

You deserved it 3 727

Today, my alcoholic mother decided to finally check herself into rehab. She did it while drunk, and flirted with the front attendant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 291

You deserved it 2 348

Today, my girlfriend left me, saying she'd started to appreciate herself more with the help of a therapist. That I paid for her to visit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 216

Today, I had to help pick a jury for trial. I had to do a roll call to make sure that everyone was present. I stood up in front of a packed courtroom and said, “Okay, I’m going to do a roll call to make sure that everyone is here and pregnant.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 590

You deserved it 676