Miscellaneous: Today, I dreamed that I was kidnapped by Charlie Sheen. FML

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By woahitbechels - 25/04/2011 01:10 - United States

Today, I dreamed that I was kidnapped by Charlie Sheen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 997

You deserved it 12 594

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My life is average

By Karen - 24/01/2025 16:00 - United States - Solon

Today, I fell asleep while watching Rocky and Bullwinkle. I then had an extremely vivid dream that I was going after Russian spies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 124

By gonavybeatarmy - 31/05/2012 05:28 - United States - San Diego

Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 667

You deserved it 4 989

Panic in the sheets of Luton…

By Anonymous - 06/07/2021 19:00 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, I had a dream in which I was having a panic attack. When I woke up, I was actually having a panic attack. Double the fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 117

Night terrors

By Anonymous - 25/09/2015 20:14 - Germany

Today, I brutally stabbed a guy to death for smiling at me, then puked and fainted. Then I woke up in bed, panicking, sweating like a pig and crying because I thought my dream was real and I was going to go to prison. I'm never taking sleeping medication again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 575

You deserved it 2 521

By BrittUnicorn - 06/07/2015 15:14 - United States - Morristown

Today, I was having a dream about Chris Pratt. Instead of having a sexy dream that I would have enjoyed, I dreamt he was a supervisor at my work. He kept telling me how much I sucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 648

You deserved it 3 679

By Anonymous - 21/11/2015 10:03 - United States - Norwalk

Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 050

You deserved it 2 327

By Anonymous - 07/01/2014 21:24 - United States

Today, I woke up to my psycho roommate trying to baptize me in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 375

You deserved it 5 214

By Anonymous - 11/08/2013 18:11 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I had a dream in which I was being mugged. I started fighting the muggers off, while in reality, my fist smacked my wife in the face. Now she has a black eye, nobody believes my story, and they think I'm a wife beater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 408

You deserved it 5 963

By imawesomeokay - 20/07/2013 05:53 - Mexico - Zapopan

Today, I went to watch a movie. In the middle of it, I accidentally fell asleep. Minutes later, I awoke on a stranger's shoulder. He was caressing my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 253

You deserved it 10 970

First time?

By Anonymous - 23/02/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I had such a realistic dream that I was about to be hanged by the neck until I was dead. I was dropped through the hole and I felt the noose snap my neck at the exact moment I woke up. I ended up crying in my wife’s arms for a solid five minutes. Now I’m afraid to sleep, maybe forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 125

LuckyLogic 0

Monday 25 April 2011 9:00

Did you drink tiger blood?

Bill3485 3

Monday 25 April 2011 9:05

fyl? no way, your life is #winning!

Comments

Nitemare18 0

Monday 25 April 2011 13:32

you're winning

fearlesslexi1 0

Monday 25 April 2011 13:37

hahaha

shadowx41 0

Monday 25 April 2011 13:43

ha ha hell yeah

meowmeowgirl 0

Monday 25 April 2011 13:45

That just made my day! Ahahahahaha :P

bindee2211 2

Monday 25 April 2011 13:56

oh wow you had a dream oh yer **** YOUR life!

KjoeLjan 4

Monday 25 April 2011 13:58

I bet it was a wet dream

TaylorTotsYumm 10

Monday 25 April 2011 19:41

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.

NextBigThing5044 0

Monday 25 April 2011 14:04

Laugh my ass off

skeezle 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 7:14

lmao

proxy630 0

Monday 25 April 2011 14:04

ITS BECAUSE HE'S WINNING!!!!!!

sviperv 0

Monday 25 April 2011 14:19

how does this constitute a FML? nothing happened to you. did you just really want to post something?

BWill9014 4

Monday 25 April 2011 16:53

omfg it's a joke dude... calm your **** and update your knowledge of Internet memes

tr3vst3r 5

Monday 25 April 2011 14:28

#bi-winning

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The Top

Today, as I was ringing in a customer, I noticed that the Febreeze spray can was wet. Noticing this, I sniffed my hands because they had got wet, and said to the customer, "Oh, the can is leaking… want to go get another one?" He then said, "No it's OK, I just sweat a lot." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 409

You deserved it 5 793

Today, I was walking around in a park when I passed some kids playing soccer. One of them kicked the ball as hard as he could at me. Luckily, I caught the ball, then I drop-kicked it, intending to say, "Go get it." Instead, it bounced off a nearby tree and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 876

You deserved it 47 218

The Top

Today, I mentioned on Facebook that I'll be out of town over the weekend, because I am attending my grandmother's funeral. I soon got comments saying "Pics or it didn't happen" and "Killed her for the inheritance, eh?" followed by a solitary "LOLLL". FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 916

You deserved it 5 657

Today, I thought it'd be fun to kick open one of those unisex bathrooms in my workplace. I'm not sure who was more surprised, me or my boss who was in there taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 329

You deserved it 39 762

Today, my current boyfriend was so impressed by my blowjob abilities he sent my ex-boyfriend a message saying thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 074

You deserved it 6 440

Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 078

You deserved it 8 345

Today, while shopping, my dad asked me to walk further away from him, saying I was cramping his style in front of all the chicks there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 353

You deserved it 2 864

Today, I was practicing soccer at my school. My team was practicing penalty kicks. It was my turn up and this cute girl that I like was watching off ten feet away from the goal. I was running to take the kick when I slipped and kicked the ball. It hit her head and now she won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 345

You deserved it 10 735