Miscellaneous: Today, I dreamed that I was kidnapped by Charlie Sheen. FML - FML

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By woahitbechels - 25/04/2011 01:10 - United States

Today, I dreamed that I was kidnapped by Charlie Sheen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 997

You deserved it 12 594

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Same thing different taste

My life is average

By Karen - 24/01/2025 16:00 - United States - Solon

Today, I fell asleep while watching Rocky and Bullwinkle. I then had an extremely vivid dream that I was going after Russian spies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 124

By gonavybeatarmy - 31/05/2012 05:28 - United States - San Diego

Today, I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 667

You deserved it 4 989

Panic in the sheets of Luton…

By Anonymous - 06/07/2021 19:00 - United Kingdom - Luton

Today, I had a dream in which I was having a panic attack. When I woke up, I was actually having a panic attack. Double the fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 117

Night terrors

By Anonymous - 25/09/2015 20:14 - Germany

Today, I brutally stabbed a guy to death for smiling at me, then puked and fainted. Then I woke up in bed, panicking, sweating like a pig and crying because I thought my dream was real and I was going to go to prison. I'm never taking sleeping medication again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 575

You deserved it 2 521

By BrittUnicorn - 06/07/2015 15:14 - United States - Morristown

Today, I was having a dream about Chris Pratt. Instead of having a sexy dream that I would have enjoyed, I dreamt he was a supervisor at my work. He kept telling me how much I sucked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 648

You deserved it 3 679

By Anonymous - 21/11/2015 10:03 - United States - Norwalk

Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 050

You deserved it 2 327

By Anonymous - 07/01/2014 21:24 - United States

Today, I woke up to my psycho roommate trying to baptize me in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 375

You deserved it 5 214

By Anonymous - 11/08/2013 18:11 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I had a dream in which I was being mugged. I started fighting the muggers off, while in reality, my fist smacked my wife in the face. Now she has a black eye, nobody believes my story, and they think I'm a wife beater. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 408

You deserved it 5 963

By imawesomeokay - 20/07/2013 05:53 - Mexico - Zapopan

Today, I went to watch a movie. In the middle of it, I accidentally fell asleep. Minutes later, I awoke on a stranger's shoulder. He was caressing my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 253

You deserved it 10 970

First time?

By Anonymous - 23/02/2025 11:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I had such a realistic dream that I was about to be hanged by the neck until I was dead. I was dropped through the hole and I felt the noose snap my neck at the exact moment I woke up. I ended up crying in my wife’s arms for a solid five minutes. Now I’m afraid to sleep, maybe forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 125

Next

Top comments

LuckyLogic 0

Monday 25 April 2011 9:00

Did you drink tiger blood?

Bill3485 3

Monday 25 April 2011 9:05

fyl? no way, your life is #winning!

Comments

makkwheel 0

Monday 25 April 2011 11:53

that's a bad thing?? everywhere I go bitches always know that Charlie sheen has gotta Winnie that he loves to show, bitch.! (=

makkwheel 0

Monday 25 April 2011 11:55

eww wait it is a bad thing haha I'm sorry

skeezle 0

Tuesday 26 April 2011 7:04

you're talking about the wrong Charlie haha

t765234 10

Friday 29 April 2011 3:08

Charlie SCENE not sheen, fail.

Riemurasia 0

Monday 25 April 2011 12:07

The horror!! xD

lazerdude07 0

Monday 25 April 2011 12:28

high priest Vatican assassin warlock...

stayawakee 0

Monday 25 April 2011 12:44

So? How is this an FML? It's just a dream.. You're pathetic.

BWill9014 4

Monday 25 April 2011 14:05

The whole fml is a joke... watch Charlie sheens winning song and latest interviews and you will understand the meme

imnotcraZ 0

Monday 25 April 2011 12:49

that wasn't a dream

rallets 22

Monday 25 April 2011 13:10

different DNA, hes from a whole nother world, a different dimension tiger blood DNA is it just me or is E.T. about Charlie Sheen? o_O

Disembob 16

Monday 25 April 2011 13:14

Winning

rewshrew 0

Monday 25 April 2011 13:18

#winning

Emmy_The_Great 2

Monday 25 April 2011 13:21

I HAVE A DREAM... where Charlie Sheen kidnaps me. (;

oolama 2

Monday 25 April 2011 13:25

...this is an fml how?

BWill9014 4

Monday 25 April 2011 14:08

god how many of you idiots are going to post "how is this an fml?" just because you don't get the Internet meme... it's a joke bro... type "Charlie sheen" in YouTube and you might understand

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The Top

Today, I went to a Hobby Lobby with the director of the play my daughter is in. He leaned in to grab a bottle of blue paint, and I mistook it for a hug. When he looked perplexed, I hugged him again, this time jumping in celebration of finding the blue paint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 509

You deserved it 558

Today, someone tried to break into my dorm room while I was in class. Ramming the metal door with their shoulder just dented it, so they pissed on my welcome mat and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 316

You deserved it 2 529

The Top

Today, I was working in a call center when I smelled perfume. I'm allergic, and it triggered my asthma. When I came back, some jerk had sprayed it all over my work area. I couldn't go near it for the rest of my shift, therefore I had to go home early, and got my paycheck docked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 692

You deserved it 2 266

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I are divorcing because HE had an affair. He now wants a paternity test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 464

You deserved it 3 645

Today, I came home from three months off the continent. My parents drove me home, and when we drove past our house, I assumed we were going for a welcome home supper. Instead, we drove to a dilapidated trailer and my parents said, "Welcome home." We used to live in a large, beautiful two-story house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 182

You deserved it 203

Today, my husband spoke enthusiastically about his day to my sister-in-law, who doesn't care about us or our family, and who I hate due to it. While I've been trying to get him to talk, ask him questions, and share about his day for years now, the most response I get is, "Leave me alone with my coffee" or literal snores. FML

I agree, your life sucks 374

You deserved it 115

Today, I was coming home from a date, I saw my ex standing in my drive-way. He had dumped me 2 months ago saying he couldn't talk me. To make him jealous, I made out with my new guy before greeting him. Turns out he couldn't talk to me because he had had cancer and had been afraid to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 266

You deserved it 79 367

Today, while babysitting a girl, I told her to be quiet so she wouldn't wake her little brother. In reply, she told me that she would kill me, wake her brother up to show him my dead body, then draw all over my face. I'm stuck with her for another two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 896

You deserved it 3 812