By nullpointer - 03/08/2016 04:38 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I farted so loud that my cat thought that I was growling at him, and bit me in self-defense. FML
I agree, your life sucks 13 808
You deserved it 1 990
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

tygerarmy 35

Did your cat think you were growling, or did your fart destroy his little cat nose, and he bit you in retaliation?

129 3
Steve95401 49

The cat might rip his schlong to shreds in retaliation.

30 0

Comments

vinnie_boombotz 15

Haha I imagined the sound in my head with your cat growling back

5 15
Steve95401 49

The cat might rip his schlong to shreds in retaliation.

30 0
bickdig69 8

One time i got drunk and pee'd on my cat he saw my dick dangling and tried to claw it

2 1
hellobobismyname 24

#15 - I just saw you comment on another FML about you peeing during sex. Do you just pull out your schlong and take a piss all willy nilly wherever you go? Or do you have some weird idea that these comments are funny?

0 0
tygerarmy 35

Did your cat think you were growling, or did your fart destroy his little cat nose, and he bit you in retaliation?

129 3
MetalxSoldier 26

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
5 25
The12thPaladin 8

Yes, because a cat would totally think that.

18 2
Lalala579121 27

"**** man, this dude is shooting a bazooka at me. I know the best thing to do, bite him on the ass."

8 0
ulissey_fml 22

What else do you expect , with a Fart Guild type cat ?

0 10
jcash52426 5

Is your car part dog?

1 14
ImKimitheEmo 21

Well carts can be aggressive and smelly so your cat was saying." TAKE IT OUTSIDE!"

4 1
Ladisa 28

It's okay, your phone just fused "cats" and "farts".

0 1
liquifiednate 21

Just curious OP but is your username a reference to C++?

4 1
LyricaSilvan 29

I'm sorry you earned accidental rage from your cat (and got bitten for it,) but this FML is one of he funniest things I've read in a long time.

7 1
EvilLittleMan 23

Actually your contribution to the 1% of the atmosphere could fall into the category "Growler", thus the reason why you pissed off your cat and the little F -er bit your ass.

2 1