Miscellaneous: Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've...

By LondonKitsch - 26/06/2009 16:51 - United States

Today, I finally got into a yoga class with the instructor I've been crushing on for 2 years. As he walked closer to greet me, I lifted my leg over my head into a full split, and queefed obnoxiously loud. He responded with his gag reflex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 833

You deserved it 29 770

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/12/2010 13:05 - United States

Today, for the first time, a good looking guy was in my yoga class. Today also marked the first time I farted during yoga class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 812

You deserved it 5 607

Dancing queen

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 16:44 - Switzerland

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 104

You deserved it 6 401

By belle_arina - 08/10/2009 05:05 - United States

Today, we were doing stretches in dance class where you are on your hands and doing the splits in the air while your partner helps hold you and stretch your legs further. Right as I lift my left leg up, I farted hugely right in my partner's face. I couldn't make eye contact for the rest of class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 423

You deserved it 8 519

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 250

You deserved it 14 868

Core

By Anonymous - 18/03/2023 16:00

Today, I went to the gym and accidentally farted during yoga class. Everyone looked at me and the instructor said, "Let's all take a moment to appreciate the power of core strength." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 110

You deserved it 164

By mooned - 03/02/2018 01:30

Today, I went to a yoga class for the first time in a few years. When I went to change afterwards, I realized I'd split my pants at some point during the class. I think I understand why the girls behind me were laughing so hard now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 094

You deserved it 392

Class act

By raspberrysachere - 03/06/2019 16:00

Today, I was in yoga class. We were in downward-facing dog pose, and the male instructor stood behind me and gave me an assist/adjustment by pulling upward on my hips. As I left the class, I realized that was the most intimate touch I've ever received from a man. I'm a 25-year-old straight woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 817

You deserved it 249

By Craptastic - 15/09/2018 15:00

Today, at physical therapy, I felt that all-too-familiar gurgle in my gut, but I thought it would a light, silent fart. I squatted for an exercise and shit my pants in front of the cute, single, male physical therapist. He definitely noticed. I still had 30 minutes left in the session. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 815

You deserved it 659

By Anonymous - 27/10/2009 10:28 - United Kingdom

Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old man farted right in my face. The stench was appalling. To make matters worse, a girl I've fancied for ages thought it was me and reported it to the instructor. I was told to leave for 'anti-social behavior'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 620

You deserved it 2 941

By john - 28/01/2009 23:02 - United States

Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for 2 years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 841

You deserved it 5 155

Mandy_fml 0

Friday 26 June 2009 23:17

Haha, that's hilarious! Sucks to be you.

nightswimmer 0

Friday 26 June 2009 23:18

oooh that sucks, you shoulda said to him "it was you"

Comments

fyl4sure 0

Friday 26 June 2009 23:34

QUUUEEEEFFFF! lmao sucks!

GrapefruitZoe 0

Friday 26 June 2009 23:36

Um, he's an idiot...Vaginas are beautiful. Air gets caught in mine pretty much everytime my boyfriend and I get it on, and we just laugh.

bitchfacee 0

Friday 26 June 2009 23:39

shut up

apastry 6

Saturday 27 June 2009 0:02

I lol'd. Vaginas are beautiful? hahahaha

FarSide 22

Saturday 27 June 2009 0:08

OP: Sumbish, that had to be embarrassing. Still, if you did not engage in human intercourse immediately prior to this event, it may suggest that your queefer is the size of a football inflated to 12psi, and is therefore prone to the sudden, uncontrolled, expulsion of gaseous containment. You might consider an appointment with a Doctor who specializes in vaginoplasty. They can often surgically reduce the size of overstretched queefers, or install queefer mufflers. Good Luck!

mendertorsel 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 0:40

Um... Wow. Suggesting invasive surgery because air got trapped in her ladyparts doing the splits? That's a little much, don't you think?

FarSide 22

Saturday 27 June 2009 0:48

Who wants an oversized coffee grinder??

alexm778123 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 6:26

Some people really can't tell when someone is making a joke. Huh, I thought it was a basic skill...

mendertorsel 0

Saturday 27 June 2009 19:08

See, the thing that defines a joke is that it's funny. Otherwise it's just a stupid thing someone says. In that case you generally take it at face value.