Intimacy: Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing....

By esb - 13/08/2009 15:23 - Canada

Today, I finally had sex with this great guy I've been seeing. I thought I'd found a catch. We get into his room, start kissing, and things heat up. Everything is perfect until he reaches under his bed, pulls out a doughnut and shoves it into my mouth, snarling, "eat it, eat it!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 897

You deserved it 8 334

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Same thing different taste

By jessica - 02/02/2011 20:59 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he stopped, got off, walked into the kitchen grabbed a doughnut, and came back to finish while he ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 363

You deserved it 7 467

Yummy

By lovely - 26/02/2014 18:53 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be cute to put his penis through a doughnut and try to make me eat it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 129

You deserved it 10 619

By scubai - 14/01/2010 20:36 - United States

Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 596

You deserved it 5 731

Wandering

By kmyltd - 14/09/2016 06:18 - Australia - Mount Eliza

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I remembered I had a Reese's Krispy Kreme doughnut in the car. I orgasmed while thinking about a doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 887

You deserved it 3 619

Say yes

By fuckingdonuts - 18/05/2015 02:54 - United States - Edmond

Today, my boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to ask if I wanted to get donuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 068

You deserved it 5 184

By FawnPrincess - 17/11/2017 15:00

Today, my boyfriend bought my favorite doughnuts for our anniversary. After settling down and pouring a glass of wine, I grabbed a doughnut and quickly realized the filling inside wasn't jelly. He thought it would be funny to replace it with toothpaste. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 232

You deserved it 450

Saucy

By donutsex - 05/08/2014 16:48 - United States - Georgetown

Today, since I work at a doughnut shop, I came home smelling like fry oil and had bits of sugar on me. My boyfriend told me he loves having sex with me right after I get off work. He said its like having sex with a hot doughnut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 248

You deserved it 9 073

Kinky

By sandwichsex - 08/08/2009 22:39 - United States

Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 183

You deserved it 12 020

Freak out

By Anonymous - 02/01/2013 19:02 - Canada - Belle River

Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 062

You deserved it 9 901

By Anonymous - 18/08/2015 13:26 - United States - Manchester

Today, I woke up from the most sensual dream I've had in months. Unfortunately, despite it being better than any action I've had in a long time, the dream was about me fucking a donut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 337

You deserved it 4 027

YoStephy123 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 19:16

Kinky.

aback 4

Thursday 13 August 2009 19:20

So dress up like a cop. ...on second thought, an "under the bed" doughnut would be a dealbreaker, anyway.

Comments

wikifoo 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 20:56

was his name Duncan ?

theshinepolice 0

Friday 14 August 2009 1:49

for some reason all this cheesy donut wordplay gets me :] haha this was another one

UnluckyJulie 13

Thursday 13 August 2009 20:58

Hahaha! Thank you esb--this is the funniest thing I've read all week!

ayemami 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:00

that would have been ok if it wasnt from under his bed. :/

BWC1234 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:01

LOL thats hilarius 62

plexico 3

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:01

DOUBLE STUFF!

Intoxicunt 5

Thursday 13 August 2009 22:50

Lol. I think Plexico owns the internet.

shellybean87 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:03

That is soo freaking hilarious!!!

happy_me 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:05

WHAT THE CRAP

YouDontFuckWith 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:06

YDI for being a donuts hater. YOU DONT **** WITH DONUTS!

Sudbey 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:14

Apparently this guy does.

Sunsh1ne 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:55

#75 FTW.

notanazi 0

Friday 14 August 2009 7:47

ahahahahahahahahaha that was amazing, 75. made my day.

intrepid00 0

Thursday 13 August 2009 21:07

"Feeders". Run the hell away. He just wants to make fat so he can play with your folds. Unless you are in a marching band you don't need to practice your "rolls".