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My kids are 14 and 13 (birth control fail) and I tell them both they are lucky to have lived through infant hood. The older they get, the better I like them. Not everyone just thinks babies are the best thing ever. I've never been the "OMG a BABY!" type and I never will be. All they do is scream, eat, poop, and never ever sleep. And it's not like they can tell you what's wrong. At least mine were. Not all babies are bundles of joy. Some are colicky little monsters that seem determined to drive you insane. Post partum depression doesn't help. Especially if the mom has to go back to work and is getting no sleep and trying to work 40 hours a week. And plenty of women don't get any help from their spouses or partners. Even as a police officer, when I see a news story about some woman that snapped and killed her baby all I can think is that someone dropped the ball on getting her some help before the tragedy occurred. Infanticide occurs all throughout nature. Most stressed mothers have those thoughts. Like Doc said, it's a stress coping mechanism.
Even with people who are "OHMYGOD! BABY!" types, having one is extremely stressful. My mother has seven children, and at one point had 5 under the age of 6 and was pregnant again. I can't count the number of times she looked at me and said "I need some help. Or I will snap...and hurt something."
I was eleven when my mother gave birth to my brother and she practically stopped taking care of him and the family. I had to pick up the slack: going to school, doing homework, tending the baby, cooking, cleaning, and laundry. As time went on it got worse. After almost two years I finally broke down in sobs after one of my school teachers noticed my slipping grades and asked me to stay behind and explain what was going on. Even though it's been many years since then, I can't help but feel a little resentful towards her for her neglect. I understand now that it wasn't her fault but after being a surrogate mother for a couple of years, especially at such a young age, it's hard for me to look at a child without remembering those horrible days.
She was having post partum depression op. No need to worry, a lot of women go through that and have those experiences.
Bet you would throw a fit if it was the other way around. Her snooping in your diary, parents diaries should only be read when they are cold in the ground.
I'm not sure if this is true or not, but I think that there is a fairly common depression that mothers sometimes get when they have newborns. this depression can cause mothers to want to leave their babies or even worse, like what your mother wrote about. Don't take it personal, OP!
Yeah, I think I've heard about that somewhere...like in the last 44 comments.
It's called exaggeration, it was used to illustrate a point. It had been mentioned several times as early as comment #5.
Almost every parent sometimes says bad things about their kids in private like that, especially when they are newborns. I love my first biological son to death, but man, when he was newborn to 5 months old(before he started to sleep through the night), I couldn't give you an exact number of times(its in the millions I bet), that I wanted to go into his room and duct tape his mouth shut, or to lay him on his stomach and hope he suffocated, but I never did. Its very normal when parents are new to babies and almost all parents go through it for awhile, but very few actually go through with it. I may not have gone through Post Partum Depression, but the ex wife did, she left me and the kids, which is why I do not despise her as much as I should, she just couldn't handle it.
I had wicked post-partum with both pregnancies. The 1st lasted almost a year but the second ended pretty quickly. Have a 6 year old and 7 month old twins. The twins are the most exhausting things ever!! I say truly awful things to them when Im sleep deprived but in a sweet voice with a smile so they coo and I feel better! Would I actually hurt my kids? Hell no. Is it a stress-induced fantasy that I enjoy in the wee hours with 2 screaming, teething babies? You betcha! Lol
I would be scared too... But don't worry about it! It is just a lot of work to have a child and she was just writing out her frustration instead I'd actually hurting u!!
She might have had post natal depression.
Keywords
That's true motherly love
I'm sure you'll understand one day, not that every mother wants to use violence, but how stressful having a child can be. Maybe your mother went through post natal depression but wasn't diagnosed, it happens. Just let it slide, I'm sure she's happy now. She might not want to remember the feelings she had. :)